Study: Men Become Happier Than Women by Midlife

[STR8UP]

You are just pissed cos you cant compete with older guys. We all create our own reality. And we see what we want to see. You dont want to see older guys being succesful with younger women, so you don't. Simple as that.

Here is an article from the NY Times, a little old, but it might explain your bitterness.

Spot on.

These 20 something guys have NO IDEA what is in store for them if they take reasonably good care of themselves into their 30's.

The are simply pissed that the women their age are being scooped up by guys 10 years older.

You can look at primitive tribes who take multiple wives, and see a mirror in OUR culture, if your eye is trained for it.

We might not have a few guys walking around with ten wives, but rest assured the undercurrent of the "older man/younger wom(e)n) dynamic is alive and well underneath the thin veneer of social correctness.

 

[ketostix]

Who gives a fukk if she's not tight or young? ME, that's who.

I definetly agree. I have no use for an old, loose woman.

 

[insidious]

So WTF are we disagreeing about here?
If you read my post, I noted that the only thing those young chicks are good for is a lay. Nothing else. In the realm of physical appeal, any 24 year old chick will easily trounce a woman from any other age group, hands down.

If you, as men, are completely sated with that, good for you. I'm not and that's the way it is.

My attitude would be defeatist if there was an overriding sense of ambivalence in my mindset in which I sabotaged my own strong urge to be with young women with negativity and hopelessness. I have the physical urge like any normal man, I will admit that...I don't have the urge to deal with the mundane 20-something female issues. The trade-off ain't worth it to me.

 

[STR8UP]

My attitude would be defeatist if there was an overriding sense of ambivalence in my mindset in which I sabotaged my own strong urge to be with young women with negativity and hopelessness. I have the physical urge like any normal man, I will admit that...I don't have the urge to deal with the mundane 20-something female issues. The trade-off ain't worth it to me.

There's a happy middle here.

There's a BIG difference between a 21 yr old party girl and a 26 yr old chick who has her life together.

I'm not looking to get into anything serious with a 21 yr old party girl, but 24-25-26-27......different story.

I've settled on 26 as being the "ideal" age. She's likely past the party stage and she's gone through that "transition" that most of us go through around 24-25. She might not be as worldly as an older woman, but that's part of the fun....introducing her to YOUR world.

 

[Jeffst1980]

I'm definitely not speaking out of bitterness. My girlfriend is 24 years old. I have no problems getting girls in their early to mid 20's.

I believe that older men can game younger girls 100%. I don't think that the 20-something club environment is the optimal path for this. This is just what I see.


I will agree with STR8UP on the difference between early and late 20's. IMO, 26-29 is the age where most girls are mature enough to no longer rely on games, test, etc. and thus become better communicators within a relationship. Women in this age, even former AW, seem to calm down significantly and begin to value different things in a partner. For someone in their 30's and 40's that has put together a solid career and life, this is FAR better than being stuck playing games with a 21 year old.

 

[Jeffst1980]

Also, just because an urge has a biological basis doesn't mean that acting on it will bring you the most happiness. You can have a preference for younger women, but if you're in a happy relationship, why would you nix it just to chase a 20 yr old?

Believing that your biological urges should dictate your life is akin to becoming the monkey that pulls the lever to dispense cocaine.

All the Dawkins stuff on this site is interesting and may provide insight to underlying motivations in human beings, but I don't think they're meant to be a blueprint for your life. I really don't care if a girl is a virgin or not (virgins ARE bad at sex, too). I don't care about passing on my genes at all in this stage of my life, either. I just want to do things that make me happy.

 

[MrLuvr]

Sure man, you nailed it.

BTW..I think you transposed the numbers in your age.

And I think the number in your age is your actual age divided by 2.

I would have to be close to 80 before I even consider 45 year old women as a desirable demographic. Go back to the nursing home gramps, I am sure you can find some 60 year old women there that will be even more stimulating to you than these 45 yr olds.

 

[MrLuvr]

I believe that older men can game younger girls 100%. I don't think that the 20-something club environment is the optimal path for this. This is just what I see.

A 20 something club environment is not an easy one even for 20 something guys. The club environment is mostly about looks and game, that is it. The more looks you have, the less game you need and vice versa. A young looking 40 year old man, with a muscular body, sharply dressed etc with good game will be able to pick up in a club over an ordinary 20 something dude with average looks and game. Why dont you see it that much? Maybe because there arent too many 40 yr old guys like that around.

 

[STR8UP]

I've been delightfully surprised at my ability to attract girls in their early to mid twenties, and have enjoyed sleeping with them and spending time with them. A girl at that age might be immature, but she might be a lot of things, including funny, gorgeous, happy, good in bed, whatever. If I find out I don't want her around, just like with any female, all I've lost is some time and effort and a few bucks on ****tails. And I don't think just because a woman is 30+ means she necessarily has her sh*t together.

Couldn't have said it better.

One of my "plates" (and I use that term loosely) is 22, getting ready to move into a college dorm.

You would think that she's immature, chatting on the cell phone and texting all day, but nothing could be further from the truth.

When she comes into town we go out and talk about art and travel and food and all of the other things I would talk to a mature, cultured woman about.

I went on a couple of dates with a 32 yr old recently, and about the only difference between the conversation with the 22 and the 32 yr old was the occasional "jab" made by the 32 yr old toward her younger competition. I get along perfectly with both women and I relate to them on exactly the same level.

Don't lump all younger chicks into he same stereotypical category.

 

[ketostix]

A 20 something club environment is not an easy one even for 20 something guys. The club environment is mostly about looks and game, that is it. The more looks you have, the less game you need and vice versa. A young looking 40 year old man, with a muscular body, sharply dressed etc with good game will be able to pick up in a club over an ordinary 20 something dude with average looks and game. Why dont you see it that much? Maybe because there arent too many 40 yr old guys like that around.

This is a good point. A lot of 20-somethings have trouble picking up in a club. But my point is I see early 20-somethings fairing better than the 30-40 somethings with the early 20-something girls from 10-1 to several 100's to 1 ratio. Out hundreds of people at the clubs I might see one group of obvious 30-40 somethings getting some where with early 20's girls. They seem like old naturals and act like 20 year olds. It just seems like the older guy has to bring a lot more game to bear.

So we're not comparing apples and oranges, I'm mostly talking about the club enviroment and girls being <23 and the guy >30. If we are talking about girls in the 24-28 age range, a 30-year old that looks like a 20-something, or outside the club enviroment then it a different story.

 

[ketostix]

There's a happy middle here.

There's a BIG difference between a 21 yr old party girl and a 26 yr old chick who has her life together.

I'm not looking to get into anything serious with a 21 yr old party girl, but 24-25-26-27......different story.

I've settled on 26 as being the "ideal" age. She's likely past the party stage and she's gone through that "transition" that most of us go through around 24-25. She might not be as worldly as an older woman, but that's part of the fun....introducing her to YOUR world.

I got to agree. There's a difference between an 18-21 year old party chick and a mid 20's girl. If a girl hasn't matured enough by 25 then she's never going to really mature. She just gets older. I thinkj we've talked about the before. And really most of the value a female has is her physicalities, youth etc.

 

[MrLuvr]

. Out hundreds of people at the clubs I might see one group of obvious 30-40 somethings getting some where with early 20's girls. They seem like old naturals and act like 20 year olds. It just seems like the older guy has to bring a lot more game to bear.

Right there is the issue. I know the kind of guys you are talking about. And I have seen them too. And yes you are right, these kinds of guys dont get too far in a club. But, why is that? It is because something about them just doesnt fit right. They have got their beer belly going, they might have hit the bars after work and are still dressed in their khakis and button down shirts and obviously not "part of the crowd". They are all hanging around together, they are not in with the crowd.

The 30-40 somethings that are actually succesful in the clubs are the ones that you dont notice. They are part of the crowd. They have the looks, the clothes, the game. They are working it. You wouldnt even know how old they were unless you actually stopped and asked. So, it is happening. But you have to look harder into the crowd to find these guys.

 

[MrLuvr]

There's a happy middle here.

There's a BIG difference between a 21 yr old party girl and a 26 yr old chick who has her life together.

I'm not looking to get into anything serious with a 21 yr old party girl, but 24-25-26-27......different story.

I've settled on 26 as being the "ideal" age. She's likely past the party stage and she's gone through that "transition" that most of us go through around 24-25. She might not be as worldly as an older woman, but that's part of the fun....introducing her to YOUR world.

I would still not lump all 21 year olds as party girls. I once dated a 19 year old that was more mature than a lot of 30 year olds I know. Didn't party, didnt drink, drink smoke. Nothing. Plus she was hot.

Also, I think the level of maturity varies depending on where they come from. If we are talking about N American women, then yes, you are right, the majority of 21 year olds are very immature. Now if you pick up a 21 year old from East Europe or Russia, you will see a WORLD of difference in their maturity level. I would say that at 21 yrs old, a lot of them are fully mature women. Again, there are exceptions. But, this is what I have noticed in general.

 

[STR8UP]

The 30-40 somethings that are actually succesful in the clubs are the ones that you dont notice. They are part of the crowd. They have the looks, the clothes, the game. They are working it. You wouldnt even know how old they were unless you actually stopped and asked. So, it is happening. But you have to look harder into the crowd to find these guys.

Exactly.

There are plenty of 30-40 somethings that DON'T fit in. Hell, there are some guys in their late 20's that are out of place amongst a younger crowd.

But why so many guys still buy into this "fitting into your age slot" thing is beyond me.

Most of the guys I see who buy this line of BS are the ones who are married or divorced, or guys in their 20's who haven't lived it yet.

Last night I was at this party talking to a 24 yr old guy I know, a friend of a friend. He obviously isn't on the same level as i am with business experience and such, but we talked business. I can relate to him easily because he's into more than doritos, playstation, and nasty beer.

You will find that if you are an interesting, fun, engaging "mature" man, it doesn't matter how big the age gap....younger people, guys AND girls will like you and want to hang out with you.

 

[STR8UP]

I would still not lump all 21 year olds as party girls. I once dated a 19 year old that was more mature than a lot of 30 year olds I know. Didn't party, didnt drink, drink smoke. Nothing. Plus she was hot.

I agree. There are women out there who are mature for their age. I have known several.

But as I stated before, there simply is NO substitute for life experience.

Your point about eastern European women being different is spot on. I've been there twice. Too bad I'm kinda stuck at the moment or I would probably be over there having the time of my life before I am actually PHYSICALLY unable to keep up with the younger crowd.

Lets just hope that day doesn't come anytime soon. Knock on wood.....

 

[MrLuvr]

Your point about eastern European women being different is spot on. I've been there twice. Too bad I'm kinda stuck at the moment or I would probably be over there having the time of my life before I am actually PHYSICALLY unable to keep up with the younger crowd.
.....

One more point though about these European chicks, it is not that they party any less. It is just that they start much earlier. A lot of them start clubbing and drinking at 14 or 15. So by the time they get to 21, they have it out of their system and are thinking about settling down. In N America, 18-19 is when they actually start getting into clubs, so it takes them till their mid 20s to settle down.

I would say, in general, a 21 year old Euro chick, has the same level of maturity as a late 20s N American woman.

 

[Ballie]

Hi Scaramouce

Love to have a couple of frosties - but need to tune the lighties first.

Some of you have got it right. Yes, you can fvck the old bats. But as men always prefer the younger woman. That is the natural way so is it that woman will only have a serious relationship with someone older than them. Think of your teen years (very close to some of you would say).

This weekend only confirmed what I'm about to say. This real hot 34 year old approached me, we had been bumping into each other for some time, but I was still emotionally involved with my ex - that that is only recently history.
AS SOON as she realised that it was over, she dumped her younger boy friend and picked me up. I think for her its an Electra complex (daddies girl), which ALL girls go through. She wants a man not a boy.

Anyway here in SA, our meisies are not as stuck up as the yank chicks, the English ones have absorbed that culture of entitlement.

 

[iqqi]

This is what I've been seeing as well. It's not what I want to say, it's what I actually see. I don't doubt some of the guys here who say that regularly pull 21 year olds. I'm not sure if they're doing it from the cold approach in nightclubs or some other avenue. But there's just not too many older guys I've ever known that were having much success with the early 20's girls. This the MM forum so we should talk about what is really happening and not what we want to happen. That's the only real way to come to the best solutions.

Haha, I've been TRYING ta say this.

Denial! Not just a river in Egypt!

 

[iqqi]

WHY are the main posters ranting on and on about "transcending age" and the "age gap" and "age doesn't matter", and "acting and dressing how old you feel", why are they the MAIN ones... the SAME ones, who are the most hung up about age?!

 

[Rollo Tomassi]

Name a single female actress with the same sex appeal as older men such as Harrison Ford, Sean Connery or even George Clooney (early 50s)? Men can enjoy a slow-burn sex appeal - assuming they play their cards right - well into their 50 and in some cases (Sean Connery) 60s. Now granted those are celebrities, but this slow-burn is exclusively male, whereas a woman of 40 may be able to stay on top of her appeal for a while, her appeal is limited to her physicality where a man's is based on much more than this (physique being one primary element of course).