yes yes I know. I should have had a plan on what to do after the opener. anyways I messaged a girl on Facebook. I used an opener I saw a forum somewhere that said " is that a wig or your real hair??" she messaged back with "its mine??" the guy on the forum said just to say you were just wondering and then to go straight into an opinion opener but I don't think that would be good since usually opinions need to be spontaneous. so what should I say next to transition?
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
stuck in transition on Facebook
- Thread starter adamw5963
- Start date
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Packers2010
Master Don Juan
just be real man. say something like.
haha, hey i was just messin around there. i thought you wa cute so i had to message you.
then just talk about whatever. i would keep it short. then ask her for her number.
i hope this helps. ( this should come with a warning though. i am still a noobie so. take it was you will.)
haha, hey i was just messin around there. i thought you wa cute so i had to message you.
then just talk about whatever. i would keep it short. then ask her for her number.
i hope this helps. ( this should come with a warning though. i am still a noobie so. take it was you will.)
Yeah I'm a newb too. I thought it would be pretty obvious that I was hitting on her by asking her opinion when there are millions of other girls on facebook. So why not just come out and be direct. But then again what do I know. haha
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.