Dink
Don Juan
i doubt little girls dream about marrige, but when i was a little boy the last thing on my mind was women and marriage. their smoking dope.
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
"Stay Single"
- Thread starter RKTek
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
studmuffin15
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 13, 2000
- Messages
- 606
- Reaction score
- 2
penkitten:
u r right. not ALL guys are good and not ALL girls are bad. <BUT> this topic was slanted for guys to stay single as an alternative to being with women. so thats why most of these posts are a little critical of women.
dink:
i dunno. ever look at a little girls coloring books? theres plenty of examples to little girls of brides being put on a pedestal. besides, just look at the wedding itself. EVRYBODY knows who the bride is. the groom? well, u do have it narrowed down to 1 of 15 guys in tuxedos. like i said before, go figure.
u r right. not ALL guys are good and not ALL girls are bad. <BUT> this topic was slanted for guys to stay single as an alternative to being with women. so thats why most of these posts are a little critical of women.
dink:
i dunno. ever look at a little girls coloring books? theres plenty of examples to little girls of brides being put on a pedestal. besides, just look at the wedding itself. EVRYBODY knows who the bride is. the groom? well, u do have it narrowed down to 1 of 15 guys in tuxedos. like i said before, go figure.
penkitten
Master Don Juan
Originally posted by studmuffin15:
penkitten:
<BUT> this topic was slanted for guys to stay single as an alternative to being with women.
i guess my point was alot of us want to stay single forever also
Ivan Drago
Senior Don Juan
I too am against the process of marriage but I believe in a life partner. I am going to wait as long as possible to finally settle on one woman and I am not going to marry her - but I will live out the rest of my life with her.
Think about it - do you really want to grow old by yourself? Do you really want to die alone?
Think about it - do you really want to grow old by yourself? Do you really want to die alone?
The Scorpion King
Don Juan
Visit the old folks home and you will see that most of their mate is dead and they are alone. Don't get married for the fear of being alone because it will catch up with you eventually...unless you go before everyone else.... or you can always be the DJ at the old folks home, probably will have to change the 3sec rule to like 6 sec or something....
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
andresdj
Don Juan
To stay single READ
"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle
or to now that if you get dumped happiness is within you.
"The Power of Now" by Eckhart Tolle
or to now that if you get dumped happiness is within you.
The Dominated1
Don Juan
Bump!
DJinArizona
Senior Don Juan
One other statistic to remember - of the 49% of marriages that don't end in divorce, 99% of the men are unhappy.
I always thought I'd be married by now (I'm just about 30) but there comes a point in every relationship where the b.s. and hassles simply are no longer worth it, and of course sex always becomes a rare commodity after a while, despite the fact that all the women I dated wanted it 3 times a day, every day in the beginning. By 6 months, once a week is lucky, and it's all downhill after that.
I'm not 100% closed to the idea of getting married, but with each successive breakup I become a little more picky and a little less tolerant of women's behavior. I also appreciate the single life more each time I "re-discover" it.
I always thought I'd be married by now (I'm just about 30) but there comes a point in every relationship where the b.s. and hassles simply are no longer worth it, and of course sex always becomes a rare commodity after a while, despite the fact that all the women I dated wanted it 3 times a day, every day in the beginning. By 6 months, once a week is lucky, and it's all downhill after that.
I'm not 100% closed to the idea of getting married, but with each successive breakup I become a little more picky and a little less tolerant of women's behavior. I also appreciate the single life more each time I "re-discover" it.
Cool topic. As for myself, I would like to get married but with all the crap involved I would not do it till I'm in my late 30ies.
I will never marry out of 'love'. It will be a cold calculated guess with a contract attached to it which dives me freedom in case of divorce.
You say 50% end with divorce. It does not mean that there's 50% chance of your marriage ending in divorce. People can marry more than once in a lifetime.
So lets say the average person marries 2 times in a lifetime. It means that 66% of couples will make it work from the first try, but 33$ will divorce and marry againand then divorce again. Only by doing this they will make 50% divotce rate.
So the odds are in your favour.
------------------
_-=/Comrade Vronski\=-_
I will never marry out of 'love'. It will be a cold calculated guess with a contract attached to it which dives me freedom in case of divorce.
You say 50% end with divorce. It does not mean that there's 50% chance of your marriage ending in divorce. People can marry more than once in a lifetime.
So lets say the average person marries 2 times in a lifetime. It means that 66% of couples will make it work from the first try, but 33$ will divorce and marry againand then divorce again. Only by doing this they will make 50% divotce rate.
So the odds are in your favour.
------------------
_-=/Comrade Vronski\=-_
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Um, no, actually, I think that the 50% number is for first marriages. The divorce rate for second marriages (where the first ended in divorce) is even higher supposedly, although I'm too lazy to research this right now, I do remember stats to that effect. It appears that for second and later marriages, the fear of getting divorced (one of the things that keeps first marriages together longer) is no longer there and the couples are less apt to put up with a lot of b.s. from the second spouse.
Ivan Drago
Senior Don Juan
I don't believe anyone here is still going to be out picking up women when they are 65. But ideally you still have about 25 years to go before you die. Do you really want to spend your last 25 years by yourself slowly falling apart?Originally posted by The Scorpion King:
Visit the old folks home and you will see that most of their mate is dead and they are alone. Don't get married for the fear of being alone because it will catch up with you eventually...unless you go before everyone else.... or you can always be the DJ at the old folks home, probably will have to change the 3sec rule to like 6 sec or something....
I don't believe in marriage, but I am not going to spend my last 25 years alone. So I will have to find a woman I want to spend the end of my life with. I just need one that doesn't believe in marriage herself.
( . )( . )
Banned
couldnt let this one die, great post btw RK
Marriage makes sense if you want to have kids. If not, why bother. The beauty of becoming a DJ is that you are able to consistantely attract quality women (this took quite some time for me to accomplish). Once you have the necessary skills, you will realize that there are numerous beautifull women out there that would be great for a LTR. Armed with this knowledge, I believe that I will better be able to avoid the marriage trap. Maybe by the time I am 40-45 I will be ready to marry some Hot 30 year Old and start a familly.
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
-HPNOTIQ-
Master Don Juan
Gotta give props to ( . )( . ) and fan27 for bumping this older thread. I read through all four pages of responses and have to say that this is the most interesting thread I've read on this board in a long time.
As for marriage, yep, the odds are right on 50/50 that it will turn into divorce. Will I take those odds in an airplane crash? Certainly not. Will I take those odds in marriage? Absolutely. However, will I be hasty in my decision? Never.
Marriage isn't a big social event where you and your wife can finally feel "all grown up" and climb some social hierarchy. It is a commitment few people understand. It is a commitment emotionally, physically, spiritually, and most importantly financially (as proved by many a divorce case).
So why do I believe that marriage can work for me? The answer is simple...I believe in marriage, of this Holy Union, because I believe I have the ability to give the Love that drives a marriage to work unconditionally. And, if I have the ability to carry this love, then, in a world with millions of women...I believe I will find one. Plain and simple.
Am I ready for marriage now? Maybe not. I still enjoy the single scene. I still enjoy the freedom to go to the gym after a long day at work. I still enjoy having a Nuked TV dinner in front of the TV while I watch old re-runs of Three's Company and Married With Children.
But, in due time, the woman who can match what I have to offer in marriage will be mine...in time. My definition of a DJ isn't the number of women I can bed, I'd rather read books than worry about STD's. My definition of a DJ is to be an independant, well-rounded man - who in the end - will ultimately find his match in a woman.
As for marriage, yep, the odds are right on 50/50 that it will turn into divorce. Will I take those odds in an airplane crash? Certainly not. Will I take those odds in marriage? Absolutely. However, will I be hasty in my decision? Never.
Marriage isn't a big social event where you and your wife can finally feel "all grown up" and climb some social hierarchy. It is a commitment few people understand. It is a commitment emotionally, physically, spiritually, and most importantly financially (as proved by many a divorce case).
So why do I believe that marriage can work for me? The answer is simple...I believe in marriage, of this Holy Union, because I believe I have the ability to give the Love that drives a marriage to work unconditionally. And, if I have the ability to carry this love, then, in a world with millions of women...I believe I will find one. Plain and simple.
Am I ready for marriage now? Maybe not. I still enjoy the single scene. I still enjoy the freedom to go to the gym after a long day at work. I still enjoy having a Nuked TV dinner in front of the TV while I watch old re-runs of Three's Company and Married With Children.
But, in due time, the woman who can match what I have to offer in marriage will be mine...in time. My definition of a DJ isn't the number of women I can bed, I'd rather read books than worry about STD's. My definition of a DJ is to be an independant, well-rounded man - who in the end - will ultimately find his match in a woman.
THA REALNESS
Banned
Just b carefull!
Most pple are looking 2 settle down 1 day. So I tell ppl 2 b carefull and analyze all the details ,and ins and outs of that possibility> ME personally right now i'm in that PLAYA 4 life way of thinking ,but i would perfer 2 have a gf and have my eye open 4 a possible candidate.
Most pple are looking 2 settle down 1 day. So I tell ppl 2 b carefull and analyze all the details ,and ins and outs of that possibility> ME personally right now i'm in that PLAYA 4 life way of thinking ,but i would perfer 2 have a gf and have my eye open 4 a possible candidate.
-HPNOTIQ-
Master Don Juan
Re: Just b carefull!
Did you read all the responses? Or did you just read the original post and the last page of responses? If so, re-read this material, you might learn a bit. And please, leave the ebonics at home. Ok Playa Playa on the heezy fo sheeze johny blazin hot nickelzzz fo shizzle? I'm audi 5000 g money!
hitop
Senior Don Juan
I'll consider marriage, IF she's got it together that is. If she proves that she would become just as good a wife as she would be a mother. I believe that many women long to be a mother but when it comes down to it, realize that they have no aspirations to be a devoted wife.
This is where the beginning of the end starts to occur and is rather irreversible. This is where the feminist spin pollutes the female "think and decide by committee" mind. Because my God, They think that to be a devoted wife to a man would relegate them to a life of oppression by the evil male patriarch.
Good Article on marriage
This is where the beginning of the end starts to occur and is rather irreversible. This is where the feminist spin pollutes the female "think and decide by committee" mind. Because my God, They think that to be a devoted wife to a man would relegate them to a life of oppression by the evil male patriarch.
Good Article on marriage
iqqi
Master Don Juan
I've read alot of posts on here saying that men are unhappy in marriage, but I think the truth is that those men are JUST UNHAPPY PERIOD.
Maybe they thought a woman would make them happy, but there is no key to happiness. If a man cannot show himself happiness, no woman or man can either. Happiness comes from within, and if you depend on someone else then that is just a burden on them, which results in even more unhappiness. And this is vice versa.
Find happiness before you find a wifey, and make sure she has found happiness too.
If you can't be happy alone you can't be happy with anyone else either.
Get right.
Maybe they thought a woman would make them happy, but there is no key to happiness. If a man cannot show himself happiness, no woman or man can either. Happiness comes from within, and if you depend on someone else then that is just a burden on them, which results in even more unhappiness. And this is vice versa.
Find happiness before you find a wifey, and make sure she has found happiness too.
If you can't be happy alone you can't be happy with anyone else either.
Get right.
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.