"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Alle_Gory

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DogFashionDisco said:
a group of carolers, telling them to "keep it down". Immediately realizing that this group of carolers were in fact...
...clones of John McCain and Sarah Palin. As they sang of baby Jesus...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Pathgen

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... they noticed that the Palin clone was pitching a tent in her pants and while the McCain clone suddenly simotaneously realized that he was missing his set of tools (while looking at Palin). the cloning scientists had gotten the sexes wrong which meant....
 

Da Realist

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...Hillary actually stained Bill's dress while Monica vidoetaped a pig raping a goat, resulting in the creation of...
 

AlexTheGreat

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...the next hit video on YouTube. With this horrible discovery of who their past presidents had actually been, Americans decided to ...
 

Darth

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elect Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris takes over Mexico and Canada and colonizes Mars during his first week in the White House.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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AlexTheGreat

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But when Andy came back from his 40 days in the desert after the transgender war, and survived the wrath of TouchMeThere, he became the man everyone was attracted to. Everyone... including Master of the Universe Chuck Norris.

Chuck proceeded to offer Andy a cigar and pulled the most widely frowned upon ....
 

penkitten

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AlexTheGreat said:
But when Andy came back from his 40 days in the desert after the transgender war, and survived the wrath of TouchMeThere, he became the man everyone was attracted to. Everyone... including Master of the Universe Chuck Norris.

Chuck proceeded to offer Andy a cigar and pulled the most widely frowned upon ....
everyone that didnt go vote yesterday, and then
 

AlexTheGreat

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he unleashed the now forceful mangina armies onto the hordes of voting virgins. The massacre was terrible, yet Chuck Norris enjoyed the show. Andy couldn't take the hit however and decided to ...
 

AlexTheGreat

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Andy had just had his first taste of the Dark Side. Whenever he would be walking from now on, an Imperial March would be breaking the silence. This only brought him more strength and conviction in order to ...
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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ExcelNPrevail

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only later to give light to his sex change operation that he always wanted, since he now has a vagina, but he wants to change his face so he goes to the.....
 

penkitten

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magazine stand to see who is the prettiest chick on the cover, and then rushes off to
 

Zaraza

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To her new highschool where hundreds of young average men are drooling over anything that has a hole. This new direction leads her to find...
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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AlexTheGreat

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.... and tries to f-close her within 2 minutes of approaching her. To his biggest surprise, she accepts. So he goes "huh what? You're not supposed to say that" and leaves.

Andy stares in awe, but even his now feminine looks could not stop him from trying. He picks up where ElStud left off and ...
 

AlexTheGreat

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... Andy felt a weird vibration in the purse and heard a little growl. Taking his eyes away from the mosquito bites and throwing them into the bag, he saw Paris' dog with a dildo stuck up her ass really enjoying the shakes of the snake-shaped rotating shaft.
 
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