"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Read more...

SoSuave writes a story. Post 1-2 sentences continuing the previous post

A

Alle_Gory

Master Don Juan
Joined
May 25, 2008
Messages
4,194
Reaction score
79
Location
T-Dot
DogFashionDisco said:
a group of carolers, telling them to "keep it down". Immediately realizing that this group of carolers were in fact...
Click to expand...
...clones of John McCain and Sarah Palin. As they sang of baby Jesus...
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

P

Pathgen

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 8, 2008
Messages
331
Reaction score
6
Location
San Fran
... they noticed that the Palin clone was pitching a tent in her pants and while the McCain clone suddenly simotaneously realized that he was missing his set of tools (while looking at Palin). the cloning scientists had gotten the sexes wrong which meant....
 
D

Da Realist

Master Don Juan
Joined
Sep 1, 2005
Messages
798
Reaction score
23
Location
Memphis, TN
...Hillary actually stained Bill's dress while Monica vidoetaped a pig raping a goat, resulting in the creation of...
 
A

AlexTheGreat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2004
Messages
497
Reaction score
7
...the next hit video on YouTube. With this horrible discovery of who their past presidents had actually been, Americans decided to ...
 
D

Darth

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 20, 2005
Messages
1,626
Reaction score
98
Age
36
elect Chuck Norris. Chuck Norris takes over Mexico and Canada and colonizes Mars during his first week in the White House.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

A

AlexTheGreat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2004
Messages
497
Reaction score
7
But when Andy came back from his 40 days in the desert after the transgender war, and survived the wrath of TouchMeThere, he became the man everyone was attracted to. Everyone... including Master of the Universe Chuck Norris.

Chuck proceeded to offer Andy a cigar and pulled the most widely frowned upon ....
 
penkitten

penkitten

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 14, 2001
Messages
8,255
Reaction score
235
Age
49
Location
at our house
AlexTheGreat said:
But when Andy came back from his 40 days in the desert after the transgender war, and survived the wrath of TouchMeThere, he became the man everyone was attracted to. Everyone... including Master of the Universe Chuck Norris.

Chuck proceeded to offer Andy a cigar and pulled the most widely frowned upon ....
Click to expand...
everyone that didnt go vote yesterday, and then
 
A

AlexTheGreat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2004
Messages
497
Reaction score
7
he unleashed the now forceful mangina armies onto the hordes of voting virgins. The massacre was terrible, yet Chuck Norris enjoyed the show. Andy couldn't take the hit however and decided to ...
 
A

AlexTheGreat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2004
Messages
497
Reaction score
7
Andy had just had his first taste of the Dark Side. Whenever he would be walking from now on, an Imperial March would be breaking the silence. This only brought him more strength and conviction in order to ...
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

Read more...

E

ExcelNPrevail

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 13, 2007
Messages
143
Reaction score
3
Location
Houston
only later to give light to his sex change operation that he always wanted, since he now has a vagina, but he wants to change his face so he goes to the.....
 
penkitten

penkitten

Master Don Juan
Joined
Nov 14, 2001
Messages
8,255
Reaction score
235
Age
49
Location
at our house
magazine stand to see who is the prettiest chick on the cover, and then rushes off to
 
Z

Zaraza

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Oct 6, 2005
Messages
282
Reaction score
2
Location
Oregon, USA
To her new highschool where hundreds of young average men are drooling over anything that has a hole. This new direction leads her to find...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

A

AlexTheGreat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2004
Messages
497
Reaction score
7
.... and tries to f-close her within 2 minutes of approaching her. To his biggest surprise, she accepts. So he goes "huh what? You're not supposed to say that" and leaves.

Andy stares in awe, but even his now feminine looks could not stop him from trying. He picks up where ElStud left off and ...
 
A

AlexTheGreat

Senior Don Juan
Joined
May 9, 2004
Messages
497
Reaction score
7
... Andy felt a weird vibration in the purse and heard a little growl. Taking his eyes away from the mosquito bites and throwing them into the bag, he saw Paris' dog with a dildo stuck up her ass really enjoying the shakes of the snake-shaped rotating shaft.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top