So I got the crap beaten out of me last night

[Semtex]

When I went to the ER the first thing the doctors did was diagnose me for fractured cheekbone and orbits, but I was fortunate according to him that though swollen, I didnt fracture anything and would not require reconstructive surgery of any sort.

I think the fact that she got in between us also saved me from getting really ****ed up.

TBH, I dont lay too much blame on him, though the first thing I made clear to him was that I had no idea, absolutley no idea she was married. And it didnt stop him from raging.

 

[HeyPachuco!]

Thats a bunch of crap. The husband was justified in his behaviour. Maybe the Op didnt deserve it, but what do you expect? You think the guy should buy him lunch, for exposing his wife for the hor she is?

Actually, it sounds like the guy went easy on him. A well built guy using knuckles on a 145 lb. guy who was fvcking his wife, and he gets away with only 7 stitches? Think about that for a minute. First of all, he shouldn't have been conscious after the first blow, let alone a whole rage beating. And he was in good enough shape to drive afterwards. The last time I got beat up, I couldnt open my eyes for two days, and that was a bar scrap, with no weapons. I almost want to call bullshyt for that reason, but I'll give the benefit of the doubt.

He's lucky he has any teeth left, and his jaw isnt wired up.

I've seen what knuckles do to people. Its not pretty. You could kill someone easily. I have a pair, but I would only use them in a life or death situation.

I saw a average size guy hospitalize a fvcking NAVY SEAL with knuckles. The guy didnt have a chance. he was down for the count after three punches.

To be honest, I'd probably do the same thing, just out of pure rage. I'd like to think I wouldnt, and I wouldnt plan on it, but coming home to someone banging your wife is enough to make a lot of people snap. And if the dude came back to my house to 'mob' me, he'd be greeted by my .45.

OP, Im not in any way insinuating that you're at fault here, Im just saying a man is justified in freaking out if he comes home to that.

Be thankful it wasn't worse, and consider it a valuable lesson. You might even want to call the guy, and explain the situation you were in, and say that while you cant blame him, you didnt deserve it, and he needs to take care of the medical bills plus P+S, or you will have to sue both of them.

I don't get how you're not insinuating that its the OPs fault, but then say ''he got off lightly''?

This is soley the Wife's faults and problems here. The OP said he had no idea she was MARRIED.

The first person I would go to grab is my Wife, first reason being, is "What is this man doing in my home?" He shot first and didnt ask questions later. I may be coming off a little hypercritical, but I cant see how you cannot see the actions of his wife and condoning such a beating?

Whats the point in all the sueing bravado! Thats prolonged and a waste of time. Personally, me, we would've been there till the cows came home scraping it out left, right and centre like we was in the UFC. Because I am innocent, until proven guilty. I don't care for size. That is assault. He could've been a random guy for anywhere coming in to kill me for no apparent reason, the Husband could've ended up in a serious condition if it was a different guy.

Its the own fault of you're Whorish Wife - This man scored, without knowing the internal situations of what was going on.

Tommorow, ..if I happen to go to my female colleauges home and have wild sex with her, unknowing that she is married. Are you telling me her Husband has the right to put the flames out of me? Must be joking. I understand WHY he reacted like that, but I WOULD, sail at my wife first.

 

[Drewskie]

First off, crazy sh!t man. Second, I don't think you were in the wrong at all. If her husband had any sense, he would have realized the possibility that his wife is lying hor and that you had no idea. Although, in that situation most men's natural reaction would be to kill the other guy. Hopefully when you left he noticed that she hid all indications of her marriage. I'm willing to bet she already told him everything about you, as well as tried to put the blame on you, you seduced her, wouldn't leave her alone, etc...... Since it seems that you were in the right here, you may want to get some authorities involved, it's hard to tell what else the guy is capable of, especially since you have no idea what else is (soon to be ex) wife has told him.

 

[Leisure Suit Larry]

I dated a BPD at work, and she went CRAZY on me one night and threw me out when I was drunk and in a neighborhood I didn't know an hour from my house.

I had to see her at work and it was horrible. I ended up being included in a round of layoffs a few months later. I'm sure she had something to do with it.

I am lucky as hell I found a better new job in this recession. Will never bang a girl at work again.

 

[KontrollerX]

"Whats up with guys like MattS and Warrior74? Is it really necessary to have this chip on a shoulder and call posters 'idiots' and 'dumbasses'? I only came here for mature feedback."

Well you're right its not necessary but at the same time you have to try and look at things from their perspective.

Likely these two guys are deeply caring people and it is that caring which motivates them to such angry terms, they want to quickly convey to a guy that he's going the wrong way and potentially endangering his life.

All of us here see so many dumbass guys and posts over time it can be hard to remain civil as the caring breaks through and you just want to yell some sense into a person and sh!t some people enjoy greatly the tough love approach...not all...so its a hard judgement call to make of what kind of post you are going to construct for a particular person or not.

Usually helps in the decision making process of whether to make an insultive tough love post or not if the topic creator says something like "feel free to let me have it guys if I'm fvcking up majorly by considering this" which some past posters I believe have done indicating they don't mind being torn into.

Anyway the caring comes from these guys gradually themselves learning how valueable their fellow men are and again they just want their fellow men to see their own value and make adjustements to protect themselves thats all.

Its also kind of like them being effected to deeply care because they may remember themselves in a similar position of ignorance and the anger is also motivated at their past ignorant self that could of avoided so much similar trouble and pain if only they'd been taught another path to take.

The angry phrases are the fastest reactions their minds reason will get you to avert course and not harm yourself or anyone for that matter whom they reply to with similar vitriol.

I'm not a fan of the tough love approach myself but I do understand that its sometimes necessary or can simply be an emotional overreaction from a very caring poster that at that moment can't find any other way to express themself that they'd feel would have a powerful impact.

"Anyway what signs should I be looking for if I've only been to her house once before? Two weeks, in which we mostly had our liasions at my place, where she makes no mention of her husband, and obviously no 'couple photos' lying around the house, so what the hell do you want me to do when some woman approaches me under the auspices that she's single and available?"

Your opening post seems to indicate you noticed BPD behaviors in her all along and knew of the BPD condition and if that was the case those behaviors should of been enough for you to eject...then again this may not be the case and you may of just discovered this site and read around and discovered BPD and then had a eureka moment of understanding that this is likely what you were dealing with.

This is a big problem with posters even long time ones and what I'm getting at is not putting enough information in their opening posts so we can give the best informed answers possible.

So anyway my advice to you is read more HPD, BPD, Cluster B threads, learn all those signs and behaviors as well do a forum search for "Red Flags" and learn all of those signs and then you'll be able to tell which women are to be ejected from immediately.

Also you can best avoid BPD and HPD women by hunting for women yourself and not waiting for one to come on to you. In other words you go spit some game to some chick and in that way she's your prey and not the other way around, you can observe her from afar for a while to see if there's any signs of emotional instability or weirdness and maybe ask some vague non creepy questions about her to others before you make your approach getting some idea of what she's all about but the main thing of this paragraph if you get nothing else from it is that if you more often than not go after women rather than waiting for them to come to you, you will usually avoid Cluster B drama as they are natural predators and prey on men they think would be good targets for their games and manipulations.

So instead of waiting around for a potential Cluster B predator to approach you, you be the predator instead and hunt for healthy women to the best of your ability.

Of course this doesn't mean you have to reject all women that come onto you out of the blue but simply keep your eyes more open to their behaviors this time and until you really get to know them for a vast amount of months don't be meeting up with them at places where your safety could be compromised such as their house where an angry husband can bash your head in at a moment's notice.

Go on dates, go to motels, think of excuses for why you never wanna go to her place or yours or simply be vague and say that you don't do those meetup places until you really get to know a woman well and always avoid her whinings and asking you of how long it will take because if she learns it will take say 6 months before you and she can go to eachother's houses she'll simply structure her life to hide her true self for those 6 months and then unleash it when she feels she's got you on her hook.

Don't worry too much over women breaking up with you over this vague not going to eachother's houses approach and instead meeting up at motels after your dates as sure some will stop seeing you over it but the vast majority will get off on the idea that they are your mistress and you are hiding a wife somewhere in the background.

All women love drama to a degree even healthy chicks.

"I wont get fired from work if the relationship is publicized, infact, Im the only person at work who currently knows she's nuts. She pleaded with me today to not tell anyone that she had something to do with my facial injury."

She doesn't want her facade of perfection ruined.

Go ahead and ruin it and let everyone know what happened so they know what a lowlife she is so she can't fvck you over in the future with some form of blackmail which BPD's are prone to use to get their way such as telling you she'll go around screaming that you raped her if you don't give in to a relationship with her.

You've got to immunize yourself against her threat and the way you do that is by letting others know what she is and what happened to you as the result of her scummy cheating behavior and lying to you as well you combine that with as much no contact as possible, not talking to her at all other than any critical work related business you two need to engage in together. Ignoring them makes them even crazier for you but if you don't give up the ignoring routine eventually she will most likely leave you alone.

"she claims this was the first time she cheated. I basically told her I have absolutely no sympathy or respect for her."

Oh no if she's a BPD she's had more c0cks in her than Jenna Jameson and she's cheated on every boyfriend/husband what have you and always will because her illness makes it so she needs to in order to feel attractive and alive as well she needs the attention and drama of it all.

 

[Semtex]

KontrollerX, you truly are a guru...

 

[Da Realist]

TBH, I dont lay too much blame on him, though the first thing I made clear to him was that I had no idea, absolutley no idea she was married. And it didnt stop him from raging.

You have to think for a second that the guy doesn't know if you're telling the truth or not. People will say anyting to get out of a bad situation. I hear the whole "he should only be mad at his wife" thing, but from the practical standpoint, I would make them both pay. Yeah she did it, but I don't know the other so it would be safer for me to assume he was in on it too. Ain't fair, but a man gets what's coming to him when he's not careful eventually.

But to be real, if your really didn't know she was married, leave the revenge part out. Let him deal with his crazy wife and you go on with your business because you'll just be adding fuel to the fire. Plus she wants you to escalate it since she's called telling you how suicidal she is. She wants you to care and, more than anything, wants two men fighting over her. She's even got you to the point where you're shifting the blame from her to him when he did what most married men would have. You may feel your pride is at stake, but this is one of those times you win by not even fighting back. Don't even let that woman get too close to you at work when there aren't a lot of people around. Avoid her. I mean, act like a tailback, stiff arm her in the face, spin off, and keep running if you have to.

 

[Warrior74]

Whats up with guys like MattS and Warrior74? Is it really necessary to have this chip on a shoulder and call posters 'idiots' and 'dumbasses'? I only came here for mature feedback.

Anyway what signs should I be looking for if I've only been to her house once before? Two weeks, in which we mostly had our liasions at my place, where she makes no mention of her husband, and obviously no 'couple photos' lying around the house, so what the hell do you want me to do when some woman approaches me under the auspices that she's single and available?

I wont get fired from work if the relationship is publicized, infact, Im the only person at work who currently knows she's nuts. She pleaded with me today to not tell anyone that she had something to do with my facial injury.

She called me a half hour ago btw, crying her eyes out and contemplating suicide. She hates herself, etc. I did not even have the energy to feign sympathy, I instead asked her wtf was going on. All I could really attain was that her husband was neglecting her inside and outside the sack. They've been married nearly a year, and she claims this was the first time she cheated. I basically told her I have absolutely no sympathy or respect for her.

Don't ask about, ask me. That's what a man does. Don't speak for me, speak to me, Kontroller. That's also what a man does. I don't expect that to happen again from either of you. If any of you are too scared to ask someone a direct question, I need to you reach down and check for your balls. If you think you know why I did something, I need you to keep your thoughts to yourself until you ask me yourself.

So you fell into the trap. Well I apologize for calling you a dumbass for that. Now as for the rest of your petty revenge crap, I know that's just your anger speaking. But if you let it run you, you fail.

As for how she feels. Don't buy it. Fool you once, shame on her....you know the rest.

 

[sodbuster]

Some of you guys talking about fighting really don't know what the he11 you are talking about. Fight like the UFC? BS! Those guys are trained fighters who can take a punch and they are wearing gloves[not much padding,but some],have their faces lubed to avoiid cuts etc. I've seen guys picked up and dropped 6 feet back from where they started[kicked in the stomach]-fight over. A wrestler tried a takedown on a friend-he got picked up,bodyslammed on the pavement and punched 3 times in the face-sounded like a dull axe hitting meat. Eyes were rolled back up in his head, I htought he was killed. Another wrestler put in a headlock and ran into the brick wall of the bar. I've NEVER seen a street fight last much more than a minute.

There are rules in UFC for a reason-it's a SPORT! In a street fight, I'll be looking to take out your knee,break your collarbone,poke you in the eye or other various treats I learned in the dojo,but never got to use.

 

[cola]

dont get killed over a female

Right..
Kill that b!tch.

No in all actuallity though, I have a terrible temper and would have burned the house down.. Especially after he bloodied by beautiful chocolate face. Your a better man than I.

Oh yeah, at sodbuster..
My friend has been practicing muay thai and BJJ for 8 years.. I saw him personally .. In a street fight; Flying knee a guy in the face.. The guy fall to the ground and placed in a nasty arm submission that I don't even know the name of, but I heard the arm snap..

So..
Drunk bar guy Vs UFC fighter I'd put my money on UFC fighter..
Maybe even my life ..

 

[Semtex]

I told 3 of my colleagues at work what happened. The responses ranged from straight up concern, to props for banging the HB9, to reprimanding me for not being careful/fighting back.

She's been absolutely miserable all day, and I made sure not to even make eye contact her way. She's cracking... Im sure her circumstances at home arent optimal at the moment, and if everyone at work comes to find out what a messed up b1tch she is, she'll have no choice but to quit. She already expressed to me in the past that the work environment was a solace for her. (I should have realized that she was hinting at being in an unhappy relationship/marriage then, but oh well, I just thought that she meant that she enjoyed the escapism work provided).

The female colleagues already disliked her from the get go, she was the type of girl that other girls just naturally dislike out of envy or whatever. Now that the men know whats she's capable of, she's going to be isolated with no one, even the most AFC chumps who hovered around her to be seen with her, wont bother.

The stupidest thing I did was having unprotected sex with this cvnt. Will have to pay a visit to the clinic ASAP.

 

[Tazman]

I just can't get over the fact that you got your face punched in WITH brass knuckles. I think I might have gone back to kill the guy, this chick would be the furthest thing from my mind.

 

[HeyPachuco!]

Some of you guys talking about fighting really don't know what the he11 you are talking about. Fight like the UFC? BS! Those guys are trained fighters who can take a punch and they are wearing gloves[not much padding,but some],have their faces lubed to avoiid cuts etc. I've seen guys picked up and dropped 6 feet back from where they started[kicked in the stomach]-fight over. A wrestler tried a takedown on a friend-he got picked up,bodyslammed on the pavement and punched 3 times in the face-sounded like a dull axe hitting meat. Eyes were rolled back up in his head, I htought he was killed. Another wrestler put in a headlock and ran into the brick wall of the bar. I've NEVER seen a street fight last much more than a minute.

There are rules in UFC for a reason-it's a SPORT! In a street fight, I'll be looking to take out your knee,break your collarbone,poke you in the eye or other various treats I learned in the dojo,but never got to use.

LOL, it was just light-hearted sarcasm.

Who cares about wrestling and people being punched 3-times to the head? the point was that i wouldn't stand there or run away getting smashed on when I'm not technically in the wrong. We would be going at it something sick but at 50 I'm sure you're out of your prime for any fighting now :box:

 

[Tyson420]

If I were you and she told me she still loved him while MY FACE WAS ALL BLOODY and ****ED UP. I would have stopped and pushed her out of the car and drove away.

 

[sodbuster]

Cola, I didn't say MMA guys can't fight, I said the rules keep it a sport. Take away the rules,there would be few fights that last long enough to get to the TV commercials. Most fighters know about 30 things they can't use in the ring,but they will show up on the street. I'm betting your friend actually took it easy on him. Ask him if he couldn't have torn out a knee[major reconstruction and 6 month recovery]in his first move,then follow with a hammerfist or elbow strike to the collarbone or jaw to break it, I'm betting he could have.In the sport, you wait for him to tap out-on the street, you break his arm before his friends jump you. You did prove my point though-that fight lasted what 30 sec?

At 50, I'm not the man I was-but I still have a 50" chest and 16" biceps at 6'2",240. I STILL don't have enough body fat to let me float[doesn't look like it though-built more like a Russian powerlifter].BUT, I'll last the minute it takes for the fight to end-one way or the other. With 6 years of karate and 2 years of college wrestling-I plan on winning more than I lose. Wouldn't want to run into Cola's friend though-don't like the idea of running into a younger faster version like I used to be. Although, we could have a beer or 2. Most of the really good fighters are nice guys,not looking for trouble.

 

[Semtex]

I just can't get over the fact that you got your face punched in WITH brass knuckles. I think I might have gone back to kill the guy, this chick would be the furthest thing from my mind.

He must have been suspicious of her actions for a while. He caught her completely off guard when he barged in on us. Im guessing he was preparing for the worst, all I can do is thank god it wasnt a gun.

Im no longer mad at him. I would have done the same... I no longer have the urge to seek revenge by screwing her again. He is burdened with her now, and it was him who got cheated on, it's not like she's my wife. The stitches and bruising is still a hefty price to pay for chasing after BPD poon

 

[horaholic]

He must have been suspicious of her actions for a while. He caught her completely off guard when he barged in on us. Im guessing he was preparing for the worst, all I can do is thank god it wasnt a gun.

Im no longer mad at him. I would have done the same... I no longer have the urge to seek revenge by screwing her again. He is burdened with her now, and it was him who got cheated on, it's not like she's my wife. The stitches and bruising is still a hefty price to pay for chasing after BPD poon

Good for you. Thats the right way to think. It sucks you got beat up over her, but you have it WAY better than her husband. I dont know how people dont understand that its part of the 'game' if you bang a girl and her significant other catches you and socks you up. Physical beatings heal, emotional ones dont.

Its not like the guy hunted you down or anything, he caught you. Anyone who would actually retaliate against a man in his position is downright evil. Shyt like that is part of whats wrong with society nowadays. People want to retaliate against innocent people defending themselves, property, or relationships, and its fvcked up.

These are the kinds of people who do people wrong, then get called out on it, and then get their buddies together to jump the guy who was innocent in the first place. Lets see these people not get violent if they came home their own wife with another man.

A real man would understand. If I banged a chick, and her husband showed up and beat me up, I wouldnt blame him a bit. Doesnt mean I wouldnt fight back, but after the deed is done, I would totally understand, and I would probably buy the guy a beer afterwards, if the chick told me she was single. Its part of the game. Deal with it like a real man, and understand where the husband is coming from, cuz he's the most innocent one in the scenario.

 

[trent81]

Oh my god. I'm seriously happy that I never got caught after reading this. This is nuts. Scares the shivt out of me. What if he had followed her to my place when I was sleeping with her? He would have killed me. This story is an eye opener on how dangerous of a game I was playing.

 

[The Piano Master]

Damn, bro. I say lay into that woman so her husband doesn't even recognize it anymore.

 

[Semtex]

Why the doubt? Im curious...in anycase what matters I think is that I've gotten useful advice which is why I opened the thread in the first case. What doesnt add up, is what about this incident is fishy to some of you guys?

Yeah he ****ed with me, but I always had a knack of putting myself in another's shoes. I would have done the same, or worse had the roles been reversed. I lay the blame not on him, he hasnt stalked me, threatened me, sent his buddies to rough me up, etc etc. Im guessing as of now he's internalizing the pain, and gaining some solace that he atleast decked me (who Im sure he believes knew she was married). Police is not an issue now, because he did not escalate the violence or harrassment. Im more concerned with what his wife will do. A part of me feels sorry for him, you know the pity that comes from the assumption (rightly or wrongly) that you stole a woman from another man because you're just a better lay, etc.

I lay almost all of the blame on her. And about 10% on me, for not being vigilant for the tell tale signs of impending BULLSHYTE.