Hello Friend,

If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.

It will be the most efficient use of your time.

And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.

Thank you for visiting and have a great day!

So I actually had an opportunity with a good looking girl last night

spitfire

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He's not an incel, he's a voincel. He's basically a lady in a man's body. I've never seen so many excuses for not dating or having sex with a lady. I can understand if they looked like Missy Elliott, but if the pics in the past were true, the dude id fvckin nuts in the head. He's gone, by his own admission, nearly 3 years w/o any intimacy. He's in a dead bedroom with himself.
Is it any better than you fvcking repulsive fatties and UG's from meetup?
 

zekko

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bigdave17

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I can understand if they looked like Missy Elliott, but if the pics in the past were true, the dude id fvckin nuts in the head. He's gone, by his own admission, nearly 3 years w/o any intimacy. He's in a dead bedroom with himself.
Can you elaborate here?


I want somebody dateable - no single moms, nobody over 30-31, no chicks who are 4 feet tall (I like women around 5'2 to 5'10), only ladies who workout, nobody stupid or trashy or irresponsible, no smokers, , etc.... and I obviously have a huge preference for dark features and dark hair
 

RickTheToad

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Can you elaborate here?


I want somebody dateable - no single moms, nobody over 30-31, no chicks who are 4 feet tall (I like women around 5'2 to 5'10), only ladies who workout, nobody stupid or trashy or irresponsible, no smokers, , etc.... and I obviously have a huge preference for dark features and dark hair
You've posted pics of ladies who were interested in you in the past, but they didn't meet your standards. The board thought the ladies were doable and attractive. The onus is on you to lower your standards and just start get the ladies flowing to your bed again. We cannot always have what we want immediately out of life. No reason not to reach for it, but if an attractive lady comes along and wants to spend a minute with you, do it.
 

bigdave17

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You've posted pics of ladies who were interested in you in the past, but they didn't meet your standards. The board thought the ladies were doable and attractive. The onus is on you to lower your standards and just start get the ladies flowing to your bed again. We cannot always have what we want immediately out of life. No reason not to reach for it, but if an attractive lady comes along and wants to spend a minute with you, do it.
Doable means nothing if they're not dateable

Female attention doesn't help me if its not from someone dateable. I had this chubby indian chick Saturday who tried to approach me 5 times. What does that do for me? Nothing

I need my Greek or Italian or Latina queen
 

RickTheToad

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Doable means nothing if they're not dateable

Female attention doesn't help me if its not from someone dateable. I had this chubby indian chick Saturday who tried to approach me 5 times. What does that do for me? Nothing

I need my Greek or Italian or Latina queen
Completely understand and you have a point. If you are not attractive to the lady, then you pass. All I am suggesting, and others have as well, is to lessen your standards so you can get some intimacy going. For some reason, ladies can smell it on you. When they do, the man becomes more attractive in their eyes. It's like a sixth sense of theirs or something.
 

bigdave17

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Completely understand and you have a point. If you are not attractive to the lady, then you pass. All I am suggesting, and others have as well, is to lessen your standards so you can get some intimacy going. For some reason, ladies can smell it on you. When they do, the man becomes more attractive in their eyes. It's like a sixth sense of theirs or something.

I slept with like 8 girls in 2015-2017 (all of them way way below my league of course) and it never helped me get with the women I should be dating.
 

bigdave17

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Did you actually approach any of the women you thought you should be dating in 2015-2017 ?
only a few times but the results were always terrible

I think a lot of that is due to my negative/defeatist attitude. It's so hard to turn that off once you get stuck in that cycle of feeling like women are inherently impossible
 

bigdave17

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All women are inherently impossible about something at some damn point. If you try to navigate your life through women trying to perfectly tip toe around all of that, you'll always be stepping side to side and back away from everything in front of you.

Man up and walk straight ahead. Let them bounce off of you, metaphorically speaking.

I go to my sales job thinking that everybody will buy from me and usually a huge percentage does - the few who don't buy don't bother me


I need to have that same attitude with women but it's so difficult once you get stuck in this mental cycle of feeling like women are impossible, are never single and have impossible standards in general
 

bigdave17

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Your mindset is set up on the idea that women know exactly what they want and that it is written in stone. If what you are doesn’t exactly match that stone declaration, you will fail.

But very few women actually know what they want. Most back peddle, change their mind or just don’t even know where to begin or what to think. Most are confused AF, yet they all put on a very convincing show of empowerment. These women will say they want this, that and the other, yet make decisions on their very own that will entirely contradict those very things. I know because I see them do this all of the time with me.

All this time, you have been afraid of these very same women who have convinced you that they know exactly what they want when they don’t.

All this time, you have been molding yourself, worrying yourself, withholding yourself, keeping to yourself based on a form of their power and will that is essentially a mirage.

Women who know what they want, Dave, are very unique. You will most definitely know one when you meet one.

Most guys don’t because they never met one.

Most are timid little wallflowers pretending to be rocks.
it's same thing as my clients - many of them have no idea what they want. You just have to play the process and ride the waves with a great attitude and great energy and then take what it gives you. The better the energy and the attitude is, the more the waves give you good results


you have to understand, I convinced myself at a young age that I am not worthy of getting a girlfriend and that women are never single and are completely impossible. It's so hard to snap out of this. I have to fight myself to take any negative result with women as an instant confirmation in my head that all women are impossible and I'll never meet anybody. My brain is hard wired to be so negative and so defeatist with women, it's unbelievable
 

RickTheToad

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I slept with like 8 girls in 2015-2017 (all of them way way below my league of course) and it never helped me get with the women I should be dating.
There you go. You should continue to sleep with these ladies to help boost your confidence. So and work on your inner demons when you second guess yourself. We all have them, and consistently have to work on mine daily. You will get the lady of your dreams, but you may need to consider setting your aspirations a little more realistic. I'd love to be with Bebe Rexha or Camila Cabello, but I do not think that is something I'd be able to pull off anytime soon. Maybe in my next life.
 

bigdave17

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There you go. You should continue to sleep with these ladies to help boost your confidence. So and work on your inner demons when you second guess yourself. We all have them, and consistently have to work on mine daily. You will get the lady of your dreams, but you may need to consider setting your aspirations a little more realistic. I'd love to be with Bebe Rexha or Camila Cabello, but I do not think that is something I'd be able to pull off anytime soon. Maybe in my next life.
dude I'm really not that picky about the face - the only thing I really really want is a thick, fit body

this girl has a VERY average face but I still consider her a 10/10 to me. Outside of looks, everything else I want is just common sense - i'm 30 so I want somebody just a couple years younger than me, obviously no kids, somewhat classy and intelligent, etc..
 

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zekko

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it's same thing as my clients - many of them have no idea what they want. You just have to play the process and ride the waves with a great attitude and great energy and then take what it gives you. The better the energy and the attitude is, the more the waves give you good results
I don't know why you can't just apply this same attitude to women. Although the percentages with cold approaching are lower than for car sales, sounds like. And it is hard to remove deeply ingrained negative thoughts, but it is possible.

I also don't get this thing you have for freakishly big @sses, but I know you're not the only one.
 

bigdave17

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I don't know why you can't just apply this same attitude to women. Although the percentages with cold approaching are lower than for car sales, sounds like. And it is hard to remove deeply ingrained negative thoughts, but it is possible.

I also don't get this thing you have for freakishly big @sses, but I know you're not the only one.
I love super thick, super fit girls :p:p:p - not just the ass but I love thick, beautiful, shapely legs and calves




but you're correct with the rest of what you said. I convinced myself for so many years that women and dating are totally impossible, that I'm fighting myself against all those beliefs now


when I was a high schooler, I was mocked for my lack of dating experience (I was a fat kid) and I internalized that super hard and made myself believe I would never be worthy of having a girlfriend
 

nicksaiz65

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I love super thick, super fit girls :p:p:p - not just the ass but I love thick, beautiful, shapely legs and calves




but you're correct with the rest of what you said. I convinced myself for so many years that women and dating are totally impossible, that I'm fighting myself against all those beliefs now


when I was a high schooler, I was mocked for my lack of dating experience (I was a fat kid) and I internalized that super hard and made myself believe I would never be worthy of having a girlfriend
I’m right with you trying to break these Self Limiting Beliefs dude. Maybe if you practiced with the women you’re less attracted to and then worked your way up to these hotter ones as your Game/Confidence increases?
 

bigdave17

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I’m right with you trying to break these Self Limiting Beliefs dude. Maybe if you practiced with the women you’re less attracted to and then worked your way up to these hotter ones as your Game/Confidence increases?

you guys have recommended this a million times and I've told you it doesn't help me

I slept with multiple women who are beneath my league a few years ago, it didn't help me at all. It's like my brain puts women into 2 different categories - dateable and not dateable. Getting positive experiences with the not dateable group doesn't help me break through the negative beliefs with the dateable group. I need positive experiences with the dateable group and I'm struggling miserably to get that

I also need to stop putting the p*ssy on pedestal
 

Mike32ct

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Fair enough. But you don’t need positive experiences just yet (with women that are your type). You just need the experience, even if it is negative for a while.

The positive experience(s) will come later when you get more comfortable around that type of chick AND you meet the right one at the right time.
 
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