logicallefty
Moderator
My daughter just turned 17. Her BF is 19 and she has been with him for 3 years. I've spoken on this forum many times about how much I love the BF almost as if he was my own kid. He's a hard azz worker with a great job as a mechanic at an elite car dealership. Treats her like a dad wants his daughter to be treated in every way, but also, calls her on her female BS when she needs it. He was having issues with his family a month or so ago so I let him come stay with me temporarily. She goes back and fourth 50/50 between me and her mother's place. He didn't move in much of his stuff as the plan was to be here for maybe 3-6 months to take a break from his family who lives about 40 miles away. And that part has been working well as he is getting along better with his family now.
So in the past couple weeks he and her have not been getting along. Last night was the first chance I got to pull my daughter asside and ask "What the fvck is going on with you two?" She said she is thinking about dumping him. After a short conversation with her beating around the bush a little bit I got her to spill the beans and her answer was both simple and complicated at the same time "He's getting too fat and I'm not attracted to him anymore". And she is correct on that, he has put on a lot of weight at my house. I cook really good healthy things like grilled meats, crock pot roasts, salads and I always offer him some 100%. I have told him that my food is his food. But most times he gets fast food, orders pizza, and other bad stuff. I asked her if he lost weight if she would likely not want to dump him and she said yes.
Needless to day this is hard on me. I don't want to be biased and tell her not to dump him. Then one part of me says "he deserves to know the problem and have a chance to fix it".. But then other side of me is like if a woman came to me and said loose weight or I dump you, I would send her packing. Then I would loose the weight and find another chick just cuz of the disrespect element of it.
I really don't know what to do, if there is even anything I should do? Maybe I should just stay out of it?
So in the past couple weeks he and her have not been getting along. Last night was the first chance I got to pull my daughter asside and ask "What the fvck is going on with you two?" She said she is thinking about dumping him. After a short conversation with her beating around the bush a little bit I got her to spill the beans and her answer was both simple and complicated at the same time "He's getting too fat and I'm not attracted to him anymore". And she is correct on that, he has put on a lot of weight at my house. I cook really good healthy things like grilled meats, crock pot roasts, salads and I always offer him some 100%. I have told him that my food is his food. But most times he gets fast food, orders pizza, and other bad stuff. I asked her if he lost weight if she would likely not want to dump him and she said yes.
Needless to day this is hard on me. I don't want to be biased and tell her not to dump him. Then one part of me says "he deserves to know the problem and have a chance to fix it".. But then other side of me is like if a woman came to me and said loose weight or I dump you, I would send her packing. Then I would loose the weight and find another chick just cuz of the disrespect element of it.
I really don't know what to do, if there is even anything I should do? Maybe I should just stay out of it?