"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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She wants to be exclusive?

djceta21

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So I've been talking to a girl recently, we've made out and everything. She's asked me a few times about "What we are" and whether we're just friends, but every time I sort of just brushed the question off like I don't want to answer it. She's even told my friends that she wants me to ask her out but she doesn't want to keep bringing up the topic.

Is this the hint she's dropping that she wants to be exclusive? I know guys are never supposed to ask, but in this case has she already indirectly asked?
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Matthew Lyon

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djceta21 said:
So I've been talking to a girl recently, we've made out and everything. She's asked me a few times about "What we are" and whether we're just friends, but every time I sort of just brushed the question off like I don't want to answer it. She's even told my friends that she wants me to ask her out but she doesn't want to keep bringing up the topic.

Is this the hint she's dropping that she wants to be exclusive? I know guys are never supposed to ask, but in this case has she already indirectly asked?
Just tell her, "Not everything needs a label. All I know is that I'm enjoying the time we share together and I have strong feelings for you. Anything else beyond that I do not know. I just know how I feel."
 

PrettyBoyAJ

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She is indirectly asking you to ask her out. If you want to be exclusive with her just go ahead and make it official.
 

bigneil

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Matthew Lyon said:
Just tell her, "Not everything needs a label. All I know is that I'm enjoying the time we share together and I have strong feelings for you. Anything else beyond that I do not know. I just know how I feel."
The first part is good, but I would stop with "I'm enjoying the time we share together". A man should avoid using the 'F' word (feelings).
 

Matthew Lyon

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bigneil said:
The first part is good, but I would stop with "I'm enjoying the time we share together". A man should avoid using the 'F' word (feelings).
I can see where you're going with this. If you don't have much experience with women, then avoid using the feelings word. But if you're confident in yourself and don't say it in a needy or wussy way, nothing wrong with saying feelings. I've even told girls, "I'm enjoying the friend zone with you. I've had thoughts about taking things further but prefer to get to know you better." And that night or 2 days later we're sleeping together. And I say it with confidence and sincerity. So it doesn't matter so much what you say but how you say it. You can even buy her a drink if you just met her, pay for all dinners, and give her compliments, but it can't come from a place of neediness. That's just my experience. I'm very nice and elaborate with women. I even tell them how I used to be very insecure with women while out on dates with them, lol. They love it!
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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