She wants a second public date before coming to my place.

[Glassguy]

Very well said man thank you. I totally agree about the part where she was initiating a lot of sexually charged things (through convo, kino, practically begging to come to my place for our third date before our 2nd date was even over, etc.) then suddenly she was the 'victim' because I made a move accordingly.

I like the idea of saying something about her attitude regardless of what happens. Do you suggest going out of my way to text her about her attitude, or only say anything if she reaches out to me?

I would only recommend saying something if SHE reaches out and SHE mentions getting together. I would NOT reach out nor would I offer any more dates.......that is only rewarding her good behavior.
Her: Hey blah blah
You (Several hours later): Oh hey whats up
Her: Blah blah blah.......so are we going to see each other again?
Me: Oh wow I dont know. You got pretty upset at me for no reason. I mean if we were to become romantically involved with each other is that what I would be expecting to happen again? I didnt think it was cool that you got mad and stormed out like that.

That in itself is smacking her upside the head on how she acted.

But no I wouldnt reach out. Only reply back after taking your old sweet time.

 

[TheNewStyle123]

I would only recommend saying something if SHE reaches out and SHE mentions getting together. I would NOT reach out nor would I offer any more dates.......that is only rewarding her good behavior.
Her: Hey blah blah
You (Several hours later): Oh hey whats up
Her: Blah blah blah.......so are we going to see each other again?
Me: Oh wow I dont know. You got pretty upset at me for no reason. I mean if we were to become romantically involved with each other is that what I would be expecting to happen again? I didnt think it was cool that you got mad and stormed out like that.

That in itself is smacking her upside the head on how she acted.

But no I wouldnt reach out. Only reply back after taking your old sweet time.

I love this whole conversation hahaha - great stuff man. Now I really hope she reaches out just so I can put her in her place. She made me feel vile and a creep for literally escalating after an entire two nights of sexual tension from her. So yeah b!tch.... you WERE a tease.

 

[deBrito]

I love this whole conversation hahaha - great stuff man. Now I really hope she reaches out just so I can put her in her place. She made me feel vile and a creep for literally escalating after an entire two nights of sexual tension from her. So yeah b!tch.... you WERE a tease.

Interesting story, just goes to say that AWALT, bear in mind that the same happened to me not a long ago and i probably live in a different continent then you do, hahaha.

It makes you wonder why the heck she keeps following you in social media right? That shvt happens to me aswell.

 

[Glassguy]

I love this whole conversation hahaha - great stuff man. Now I really hope she reaches out just so I can put her in her place. She made me feel vile and a creep for literally escalating after an entire two nights of sexual tension from her. So yeah b!tch.... you WERE a tease.

Honestly if you feel that way (or that upset about how she acted) I would just block her or not respond if she does reach out.
I am very aloof and indifferent by nature so I can pull this stuff off when a lot of other guys can't because its not their personality and I totally get that.
After all she acted this way from the start and showed that's who she is.
Most people will show you who they are if you just pay attention. Next her so you don't have to deal with her anymore

 

[BeExcellent]

While you dont want to come out and call her a tease (being covert is better than overt when dealing with women most of the time), you can imply it in a way that she will understand what you're saying.

I date/spin higher quality women. Ones that are attractive, educated (bachelor's degree +) and financially independent. Non smokers and absolutely no drug use (not even weed). They cant have young kids (toddlers). Those are my deal breakers. Not that I wont smash a few here and there that meet my criteria but they arent "dating material". As such, these women of higher quality know what they bring to the table and I dont expect their legs to fly open and pull me on top of them after buying 2 rounds of drinks on the first meet up. However if they do, I will smash and they turn into lower quality in my eyes.
That being said, I have no problems with a woman who doesnt put out on the first date.....or second date.....sometimes even a third date. As long as things are progressing, I will eventually get the goods and have fun on the dates until then.

However this woman was sexual, seductive, brought sex into the conversations, etc. That is totally different. As such she is being a tease. On top of that, she played the victim card after you acted accordingly and escalated for what you thought she wanted, based off of her actions and words.
Normally the victim card is instant dismissal as it shows that she is entitled, crazy or both. She can go play in traffic if she wants to play the poor me game. Not interested.

So I would advise you to play this SLOW and put the issue on her if she reaches out. Expect her to play the victim card again if she reaches out and you dump the proverbial shyte on top of her head. Thats ok too, you simply say "You are not what I am looking for and we arent compatible" and move on without any more conversation with her.
If it were me I would be done with her but still let her know whats up with her attitude on my way out. Its great for your self worth and self respect. A lot of these chicks need a dose of reality sometimes but I only give it to them when I am torching the bridge on my way out and have no intentions of ever speaking to them again.

Good luck.

This is important. Better women and women who are sought after are going to be more discriminating as @Glassguy describes above.

And sometimes guys don’t always pull the trigger or aren’t quite sure how to escalate or when to escalate, especially men who are coming out of a marriage or LTR...they get rusty assuming they knew in the first place.

It was six dates before the man I’m seeing really escalated. I liked him quite a bit...so I was patient...but at the 5 date mark I was starting to wonder. He had just emerged from a 23 year marriage with a dead bedroom though, so it’s been an adjustment for him.

If a woman likes you and truly has high interest it’s going to be harder to mess up. I think this girl in the OPs story was more on the fence the whole time. Women will decide very early on if they can envision fvcking you. They may put it off a while and gauge your interest level (I do this)...but things will progress so you understand her desire level is there.

Sometimes it works to stir tension and let her mind wonder what you would be like in bed. Sometimes less is more. But this is a more nuanced approach...let her seduce you...but she has to desire you to want to seduce you...

Im not sure the desire was really there in the OP, and if it isn’t then escalation isn’t going to win you any favors.

The biggest thing men really need to learn is interest level. How to read interest level. You must get your ego out of the way & disregard how much YOU like HER...and watch her actions to see how much SHE likes YOU.

Actions always tell the story if you can objectively observe them...

 

[King Lion]

This is very simple.

Women don't want Men to see her as "easy" because men don't find promiscuous women attractive, so women have evolved to hide their nature from men.

Men don't find promiscuous women attractive because it's a threat to paternity assurance, in evolution-speak. The existential threat for men is raising another man's children and wasting his resources on another man's offspring. The existential threat for women is being left alone to fend for herself, while impregnated.

Women would prefer a man to think she is highly-selective and chastened because a man is more likely to invest his resources into her.

These are all primitive forces that lurk behind the forebrain.

TRUTH....This is why the institution of marriage exists!

 

[King Lion]

OP stick a fork in it! She is done - With you!

The moment she slapped you and you did nothing about it - She knew you were not man enough for her!

It seems too many simps lose their balls in the pursuit of pvssy - Just makes them softer than tits and weaker than water!

 

[TheNewStyle123]

OP stick a fork in it! She is done - With you!

The moment she slapped you and you did nothing about it - She knew you were not man enough for her!

It seems too many simps lose their balls in the pursuit of pvssy - Just makes them softer than tits and weaker than water!

great point here tbh...

 

[2Rocky]

At some point in the escalation (on a first consummation) , you need to pull back. Invoke the "I don't start something I can't finish" statement. Everytime I do this it has resulted in enthusiastic consent. Especially with strong independent women. In the heat of the moment you want them to be clear and you want them to feel like they can be vulnerable with you.

Given her history, I think I would have made her qualify for the physical attention more. If it was a sales transaction, you wanted to buy more than she wanted to sell. She was thinking maybe her asking price was too low....

 

[TheNewStyle123]

At some point in the escalation (on a first consummation) , you need to pull back. Invoke the "I don't start something I can't finish" statement. Everytime I do this it has resulted in enthusiastic consent. Especially with strong independent women. In the heat of the moment you want them to be clear and you want them to feel like they can be vulnerable with you.

Given her history, I think I would have made her qualify for the physical attention more. If it was a sales transaction, you wanted to buy more than she wanted to sell. She was thinking maybe her asking price was too low....

That is a great way of putting it - thanks buddy!

 

[TheNewStyle123]

Have you heard from her lately?

Thanks for checking in man. Nada. I noticed she unfollowed me on instagram though haha. I unfollowed her too. If she still texts and reaches out I'll respond.. but I have other women that aren't being as difficult as she was. Take the path of least resistance..

 

[TheNewStyle123]

Sorry she didn't work out. I would still text her tonight. Invite her to Starbucks one evening. Talk it out.

You think so huh? You don't think that would show a sign of weakness or being a beta? She left rather abruptly and didn't even answer my text that night when I said "Just let me know that you get home safe."

 

[derby1]

You don't think that would show a sign of weakness or being a beta?

yes she will toy with you and take your brain down the freeway & smack it off every car thats approaching,

look at her current actions, she doesnt think shes missed the opportunity of a lifetime,

 

[King Lion]

You think so huh? You don't think that would show a sign of weakness or being a beta? She left rather abruptly and didn't even answer my text that night when I said "Just let me know that you get home safe."

Don't listen to any simp's advice!

You cooked her dinner and got b*tch slapped for your trouble - That's all you need to know!

 

[King Lion]

@TheNewStyle123 some advice can skew towards 'toxic.' Like this guy's.

Some guys here would have you believe that a woman isn't worth your time and attention if she refuses to lick your b@lls while you take a p!ss.

"Toxic"....I wouldn't expect to hear such a foolish interpretation from a real player - Only from a deluded cvck-sucking pvssy eatin' simp...FOH

 

[King Lion]

Whatever you say giiiirllllfriiiiennnnddddd.......

View attachment 5861

Proves my point.....Now, go eat a gangrene infected d*ck or die tryin' B*tch!

 

[TheNewStyle123]

If I was truly interested in an LTR or more with this chick I think @Hank Moody makes a great point. However, I was so turned off by the end of the night with her making me feel like I did something wrong for escalating things when:

1.) She mentioned sex the whole night and the fact that "My ex only ate me out like 5 times during our whole relationship", and other sh!t like that

2.) She continued to escalate physically with me, but would then pull back every time. When I would stop, she would then initiate things again (grabbing me, pulling me in, etc.), but would yet again back off if I escalated further.

3.) She begged to come to my place, alone, bringing alcohol for our third date before our second date was even over...

This girl has some other yellow flags I didn't mention in the story, but she seems pretty affluent and used to getting her way and controlling men. I could be jaded from my experience. But I have other girls on my radar who are actually submissive and fun to be around.

 

[TheNewStyle123]

Respect. Fair enough.

Appreciate it buddy!

 

[derby1]

1.) She mentioned sex the whole night and the fact that "My ex only ate me out like 5 times during our whole relationship", and other sh!t like that

Dont you just love how they have the worst conversation skills, yet will ghost you over a stray eyebrow

 

[2Rocky]

This. Cooking for a girl that you haven't banged yet is way too much investment. It just makes you look needy and low value in her eyes. Same rules apply for taking a girl to a restaurant.

Eating with a girl is a girlfriend privilege. She gets a coffee or a drink max pre-bang.

Thou (both) doth protest too much...