"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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She has a boyfriend, but offers to buy me dinner?

teddy

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This old college girl I knew ended up moving to my town several months ago, so we got drinks to "catch up". Though she had the perfect looks, personality, and similar interests as me, she dropped the bomb that she had a long-term boyfriend. I decided to not meet up with her anymore after that (despite the grandiose plans she had for the both of us to go to concerts, movies, fairs, etc.) because it would be a waste of my time.

Fast forward to more than 5 months later. I fell into 2 tickets for a concert for one of her favorite musicians (and one of mine too.) I remember from the conversation we had months earlier how much she liked the musician, so I texted her and asked her if she wanted to go.

Of course she did, and then after saying that, she said that she'd buy me dinner sometime and we can finally hang out again (smileys all over, of course).

Concert got canceled. So.....should I read anything into her wanting to buy me dinner or just let this be?

Should probably also say that her boyfriend lives out of state (and is real). She might just be lonely.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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teddy

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YAboi said:
you are secretly hoping that something happens between the two of you. Be honest with yourself, man up , show some integrity and go after what you want in life. We can't analyze a girl we don't know anything about. ..
I'm not denying it. I just don't know whether to pursue because of the boyfriend part. I don't want to become one of those "surrogate" boyfriends while her boyfriend is away and then he visits and reaps the benefits.
 

Alvafe

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though I would guess she was trying to break from her BF as long she ahve something else to go, and hey if she want to pay you dinner let her, normally is teh guys who does that, try to even the field a little
 

"You Can't Argue a Woman Into Liking You"

You made your case like a lawyer. Stable job. Good guy. Ready for something real. All true. All irrelevant.

She weighed your points, nodded along, felt nothing — then fell hard for some tattooed bartender with a motorcycle and a gambling problem.

Logic is where attraction goes to die. The "22 Rules" work a level deeper, on the subconscious switches that decide within minutes whether you register as a MAN or as part of the furniture.

Stop presenting evidence. Start flipping switches.

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VladPatton

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teddy said:
I'm not denying it. I just don't know whether to pursue because of the boyfriend part. I don't want to become one of those "surrogate" boyfriends while her boyfriend is away and then he visits and reaps the benefits.
Nothing wrong with having a fück buddy, man. That's the best you'll probably get out of this relationship. From years of doing the right thing, I will no longer condemn anyone from banging a chick that wants to be banged. Always go for the gold, life's too short.

Otherwise, just let it go and find an available chick.
 

teddy

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I think all of you have given me good advice. I'm still trying to kill the AFC within me. It's become easier for girls I don't give a **** about, but for girls that I may like just a little, that's the next step.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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