"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Sex cheat sheet

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diplomatic_lies

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Hey does anyone remember that Seinfeld episode where George is having sex with this girl, and he wrote down crib notes on his hand for a sex move?

I just saw it at work today, it was absolute funny, especially the expression that women gives him when she sees it.

Girl: "Crib notes? You used crib notes??? I'm leaving!"
George: "Well it's not like this is the SATs!"
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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O

Oxide

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I remember when I was watching American Pie, I would pause the DVD, and try to zoom in and figure out what was written on those pages in the "Holy book of sex secrets"

God damn Tara was hot in that movie
 
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DJDamage

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Deus ex Pianoforte said:
It's not that hard to remember either, as long as you get that counterclockwise swirl at the end!
Click to expand...
I prefer using the pinch :D.

Yeah most women wouldn't approve crib notes as much as they wouldn't approve that you visit a site called sosuave to help you improve your game.

Girl: What is this website sosuave?? oh my gawed you used the 'gunwitch method' on me!!??? and then you made my cry and suck your d1ck like Player_supreme did??? I am leaving!!!
 
R

realsmoothie

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Oxide said:
I remember when I was watching American Pie, I would pause the DVD, and try to zoom in and figure out what was written on those pages in the "Holy book of sex secrets"

God damn Tara was hot in that movie
Click to expand...
Remember where that book was hidden in the library?

Under the section marked "fluid dynamics".
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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V

ValleyDJing

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DJDamage said:
I prefer using the pinch :D.

Yeah most women wouldn't approve crib notes as much as they wouldn't approve that you visit a site called sosuave to help you improve your game.

Girl: What is this website sosuave?? oh my gawed you used the 'gunwitch method' on me!!??? and then you made my cry and suck your d1ck like Player_supreme did??? I am leaving!!!
Click to expand...
^^yeah I always wonder about that. That would look pretty bad if a chick found out about that s.hit.
 
D

diplomatic_lies

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I've done it once too, wrote some general techniques my friend told me about in bed. I basically wrote a bunch of sex techniques on my arm, but the ink smeared and I ended up with a blue arm instead.

Man, I really miss those first few times of sex, when everything was so mysterious and scary!
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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