Now that I realize everything I was doing wrong in the past with women I still find myself having thoughts feelings or actions that are consistent with the guy that wants to be nice or maybe even a jerk etc. etc. How do I flush that stuff out? See to be honest I gotta tell ya some of that stuff has worked for me in the past. Yet I'm realize the philosophies here have a more consistent pay off.
"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
See the matrix but still can't unplug
- Thread starter sosilky
- Start date
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Vice
Master Don Juan
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Yeah, you need reprogramming.sosilky said:
I'm seventeen, my brain is still developing, so by the time I'm your age my attitude will be hard to change.
Have you read/watched David DeAngelo's material? It's geared towards older guys, and it's got some great material that'll help you realize that what you're doing is utterly stupid. You attitude will literally change overnight. Read his eBook
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Joe The Homophobe
Master Don Juan
sosilky, realize that you only got 1 life to live and if you keep being a wuss instead of acting like a man around woman you will lose time which you can never get back. The clock is ticking, enjoy your life.
everywomanshero
Master Don Juan
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- May 2, 2005
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- 1,814
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This doesn't require becoming a behavioral scientist. If you act like an escapee from the penal system for the criminally insane, most women will avoid you (people in general for that matter). If you seem like you've been living in mom's basement for the past 10 years, most people will think you a bit strange. If you act like you're gay, well, most people will assume you might be gay.
So I can tell you've already realized it's a continium.
WussBag <-----------------------------------------> Psycho
I don't imagine you want to be at either extreme. It's not easy to consistently hit the sweet spot, but when you do you'l know it because you'll feel talkative, alive, and want to interact with people. When you've hit that spot, at least in my experience, interactions take care of themselves... no weirdo, PUA, pretending to be someone else stuff required. A big part of this is realizing your own & others' intrinsic values and to stop obsessing with external indicators of "success" or "failure" as defined by corporate culture. By those external standards one is never good enough and it leads to a striving for superiority where one never feels quite good enough but always believes that just one more lay, degree, promotion, etc will provide that sense of inner security.
So I can tell you've already realized it's a continium.
WussBag <-----------------------------------------> Psycho
I don't imagine you want to be at either extreme. It's not easy to consistently hit the sweet spot, but when you do you'l know it because you'll feel talkative, alive, and want to interact with people. When you've hit that spot, at least in my experience, interactions take care of themselves... no weirdo, PUA, pretending to be someone else stuff required. A big part of this is realizing your own & others' intrinsic values and to stop obsessing with external indicators of "success" or "failure" as defined by corporate culture. By those external standards one is never good enough and it leads to a striving for superiority where one never feels quite good enough but always believes that just one more lay, degree, promotion, etc will provide that sense of inner security.