Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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Recovering

RyGuyFly

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Hi guys,

I just stumbled across this forum.

My backstory is that I come from a highly controlling religion that was very anti-sex anti-dating. My mother was controlling and suffocating and I recieved a lot of verbal abuse relating to dating and girls etc. My father was largely absent.

I had never been on a date until I was 29. Im 30 now. I feel so lost and discouraged. I feel like I won't ever learn how to find or date women I'm attracted to. I don't often feel attractive but objectively I think I'm ok looking. Thinking about this I feel so depressed.

Due to my upbringing i suffered extreme low self esteem and self worth. I'm looking for some guidance and support. Is this the right place? In the real world I feel like no one is supportive.

Where should I start even?
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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wifehunter

Master Don Juan
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1. Make sure negative and controlling people are out of your life. OUT!!!

2. Start building....hobbies, passions, career, goals, etc.

step #1 is crucial to progressing to step #2
 

fanatic22

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Hey dude, start by seeing a therapist, they can be very helpful in unwinding deeply rooted problems. The good news is that your life will only get better from here on out. I'd read the DJ Bible and Book of Pook to avoid early dating mistakes. Relax and don't take it too seriously - dating is fun and you'll get into the swing of it soon enough.
 

RyGuyFly

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Hey dude, start by seeing a therapist, they can be very helpful in unwinding deeply rooted problems. The good news is that your life will only get better from here on out. I'd read the DJ Bible and Book of Pook to avoid early dating mistakes. Relax and don't take it too seriously - dating is fun and you'll get into the swing of it soon enough.
Already have but as far as women and dating they are useless. I escaped the religion in late 2015. Went on my first date in early 2016. Any suggestions people give seem to be totally out of touch with reality.
 

wifehunter

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Hey dude, start by seeing a therapist, they can be very helpful in unwinding deeply rooted problems. The good news is that your life will only get better from here on out. I'd read the DJ Bible and Book of Pook to avoid early dating mistakes. Relax and don't take it too seriously - dating is fun and you'll get into the swing of it soon enough.
Therapists often have their own issues, so take care when selecting one.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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lizardking82

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He doesn't need to see any therapist. He needs to get out in the real world and eat some dirt. That will teach him better than any kind of therapist.
 

Murk

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What country do you live? What’s your living and employment situation?
 
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