Recent observations on Confidence.

[mrgoodstuff]

That's why I think it's almost pointless for a guy to focus on "improving confidence." Men and women can't even agree on what confidence is.

If a guy wants to focus on conversational skills, dressing better, getting in better shape, getting rid of his negative attitude, etc., great. His "confidence" may well improve as other areas improve. But "confidence" shouldn't necessarily be the goal.

Assuming women can "read your mind" always seemed a bit superstitious to me. Or that they can "size you up in seconds" sounds a bit overblown.

Thinking like that puts you in their frame.

 

[zekko]

If a guy wants to focus on conversational skills, dressing better, getting in better shape, getting rid of his negative attitude, etc., great. His "confidence" may well improve as other areas improve. But "confidence" shouldn't necessarily be the goal.

I agree "confidence" is a fairly vague concept as defined by PUAs. I would strive for decisiveness, bold action, taking right action, taking ownership of your actions - that sort of thing instead, along with those you mentioned.