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Once the respect is gone is there any way to get it back?

Striker_93

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The nature of women is ruthless, so when they recognize ruthlessness within you they somehow respect you
Someone gets it.....

Most men are too soft to deal wit these women of today, glad I don't have that issue.
 
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Pan87

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That mentally is how feminism started to take hold. In general women should submit to men. That is how it has been throughout history. 50 years ago when a woman got married she was expected to submit to her husband (sex whenever he wanted, get dinner ready, don't talk back, etc.); if she didn't do those things society looked down on her.

The man was also expected to treat his wife lovingly/protector her or else other men/society would punish the man (jail; relatives of the wife would beat the man up if he was a wife beater, etc...) This is almost the same mentality in Asia right now. Heck even in societies that practice arranged marriages, the woman would submit. And I dare say, the majority of women submit to their men in these societies and they have one of the highest rates of happiness IN THEIR MARRIAGE even though both the husband and the wife didn't choose who their spouses would be. This is the same mentality in religious sects like the Amish, the Mennonites, LDS, etc... and there are scientific studies that say religious women are more happy than unreligious ones.

Most men are NOT "absolute dogsh1t"; most men are average and the average man is not a bad person. Just like how the average woman is not a bad person. However, men and women in general are NOT built the same. Men are built to be protectors. Women are built to submit. For most of human history, this was the way it work. Heck, the majority of societies in the world works like this. Remember there are Islamic societies, Buddhist societies, hindu society, etc.. Western ideology is not the major ideology. In those societies, women submit.
In societies where women submit, what are the consequences of not submitting? Usually pretty severe.

is it real desire for submission to all men that these women have, or threats of extreme violence?

I can tell you right now. Women hate being controlled by men they don’t like. They will naturally rebel. It doesn’t turn them on. Women get turned on the most when they are dominated by a man she respects.

Women only submit to worthy men. Like it or not. If you want women to submit to all men then you can only do it through enforced violence.

Men have always been trying and failing to control women. It started with Adam and Eve and the forbidden fruit. Eve couldn’t even submit to God. Satan came along (player) and Eve switched to what she considered a more worthy man.

This allegory is very important in understanding that women are not all-round submissive. Only to certain men. To the men she is not submitted to then she is chaos.

Unworthy men, who have failed in their burden of performance, demonstrating they can’t even master themselves. These men should not be controlling anything, let alone women.
 

Slowhandluke

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In societies where women submit, what are the consequences of not submitting? Usually pretty severe.
Some religious sects, they will kick the woman out of their society -- the amish, the menonites, etc.. Some countries, they will put the woman in jail.. and obviously worse. If a norm of society is broken, expect there to be consequences. In our society, if you kill your neighbor, or possess child pornography, we would expect there to be grave consequences. That being said, in some countries not submitting to men, the consequences are small. Women who do not submit are just ignored by society and shun. Men don't want to date them. This is relatively true in parts of SE asia.

is it real desire for submission to all men that these women have, or threats of extreme violence?
At the end of the day, threats of violence keeps people in check. While most people don't want to commit murder, those that do know that there will be grave consequences i.e., threats of extreme violence by society if they do (death sentence, long jail time, etc.). At the end of the day, it doesn't matter. The fact is women living in societies where they are submissive are more happy and content then those that don't. There have been numerous studies on this. If these women were worried about "threats of extreme violence" and that is the only reason they were submissive, their happiness would be lower, but that is not the case.

I can tell you right now. Women hate being controlled by men they don’t like. They will naturally rebel. It doesn’t turn them on. Women get turned on the most when they are dominated by a man she respects.

Women only submit to worthy men. Like it or not. If you want women to submit to all men then you can only do it through enforced violence.

Men have always been trying and failing to control women. It started with Adam and Eve and the forbidden fruit. Eve couldn’t even submit to God. Satan came along (player) and Eve switched to what she considered a more worthy man.

This allegory is very important in understanding that women are not all-round submissive. Only to certain men. To the men she is not submitted to then she is chaos.

Unworthy men, who have failed in their burden of performance, demonstrating they can’t even master themselves. These men should not be controlling anything, let alone women.
The average man is worthy of the average women. Don't buy into the propaganda that the average man is bad and only a small percent of men are good. For as long as man is alive; woman is the more "agreeable" sex.. the more feminine sex. For the most part, they did not fight wars, they did not build roads, they did not innovate or bring new technologies to MANkind. They were the passive gender, and men were the active one. Only within this generation have we had women trying to act like men and not be submissive.. not be feminine.


Throughout history, agree or disagree if it's a bad thing, but women were treated and acted more like how the Taliban treated their women. And for the most part, the women didn't mind.

 
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TB24

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Once the respect is gone is there any way to get it back?
Wrong question. Respect vanishes because of missing competence and wrong decisions. If you don't gain competence and make right decisions, priorities, etc. why should someone suddenly react in a different way (=respect you)?
Thus, work on your skills. Your body, mind, habits, you name it. It may take months, or sometimes years. Consistency is crucial. This is no 2-week-makeover.
If you do that, you may probably not even want that particular person back. You probably won't care about her anymore. But that's the place where you want to be. If you stay where you are, your next relationship will probably be similar to this one.
 

Bigpapa

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The average man is worthy of the average women. Don't buy into the propaganda that the average man is bad and only a small percent of men are good. For as long as man is alive; woman is the more "agreeable" sex.. the more feminine sex. For the most part, they did not fight wars, they did not build roads, they did not innovate or bring new technologies to MANkind. They were the passive gender, and men were the active one. Only within this generation have we had women trying to act like men and not be submissive.. not be feminine.


Throughout history, agree or disagree if it's a bad thing, but women were treated and acted more like how the Taliban treated their women. And for the most part, the women didn't mind.

You have a point , but also men till recently had a very low life expectancy as there were a lot of wars for example

We should stop glorifying the average guy . The average guy does a lot of stupid things and usually never learns from his mistakes

the only way forward is for the average guy to improve , not to become vaginized and complain ( like most guys here )

things are how they are , good or bad this is the life . You can go above the problems ( like your predecessors did in time of great need ) , or you can complain and become bitter ( like women do ) . There is no middle path

if women do not like you it is more a problem with you than with them

guys perform and women choose . This is the Circle of life
 

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Slowhandluke

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You have a point , but also men till recently had a very low life expectancy as there were a lot of wars for example

We should stop glorifying the average guy . The average guy does a lot of stupid things and usually never learns from his mistakes

the only way forward is for the average guy to improve , not to become vaginized and complain ( like most guys here )

things are how they are , good or bad this is the life . You can go above the problems ( like your predecessors did in time of great need ) , or you can complain and become bitter ( like women do ) . There is no middle path

if women do not like you it is more a problem with you than with them

guys perform and women choose . This is the Circle of life
Lets agree to disagree. Men are not bad. When I say "men" we are taking about the average man. He's not perfect, but than the average woman isn't perfect. However, society demonizes "men" while the average woman gets a pass. That's not fair or a good thing to do. We have to demonize ALL people -- the average man and the average woman; or we don't demonize anyone.

It's not ok for the average woman to tell the average man: "you average guys suck. See that top 10% guy? Be more like him".

What makes the average woman so much better than the average man? Some of these women ***** around; blames everyone except herself for her decisions; she hits "the wall" and then, and only then, finally decides to give the average man a chance...etc... I could go on and on; people are not perfect.

Average women who think they deserve the top tier men, this is bound for failure. In societies where arranged marriages exist, people (both women and men) are happier in their marriages. What women think they want, doesn't necessary mean that is what will make them happy. There has been research that a lot couples in arranged marriages did not initially love their spouses (they were mostly ambivalent). However, as time passes, they fell in love with each other. They had a higher rate of marriage satisfaction compared to spouses who chose their own mates. Those are the facts. I'm sure if a lot of these women had to choose their spouses, they would not have chosen the man that they were arranged to get married to because he was "too poor"... "too ugly"... "didn't make her laugh"... etc... etc...

I see nothing that would say the average man is not qualified to date the average woman. They are both flawed and they are both awesome at the same time.
 

mrgoodstuff

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Wrong question. Respect vanishes because of missing competence and wrong decisions. If you don't gain competence and make right decisions, priorities, etc. why should someone suddenly react in a different way (=respect you)?
Thus, work on your skills. Your body, mind, habits, you name it. It may take months, or sometimes years. Consistency is crucial. This is no 2-week-makeover.
If you do that, you may probably not even want that particular person back. You probably won't care about her anymore. But that's the place where you want to be. If you stay where you are, your next relationship will probably be similar to this one.
You can do all right and someone can CHOOSE not to respect YOU. Another person can behave as you do and that person can choose to respect them. So it's not as cut and dry as you do x y and z and always on point and everyone will "respect" you, everyone will not "respect" you, but some will.
 

Bigpapa

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It's not ok for the average woman to tell the average man: "you average guys suck. See that top 10% guy? Be more like him".
This happens because the average guy accepts the old average woman

feminisem is already at the 3rd generation . If men 2 generations ago would have not accepted this , women would have stopped behaving like they do now

men did not do that and started simping as a mechanism of survival

since women can hoe around without baring any consequences ofc they do not care and start having this crazy demands

a guy that trades his entire existence for some old smelling vagina does not deserve any treatment . He deserves what he gets

and also coming to the average guy , the average guy did not do anything . He mainly died in the wars of the rich and powerful so they can accumulate more wealth

so makes no sense to glorify someone like that . The world was changed by a handful of people , not because of the average guy .

the only time when the average guy was glorified was during communism , and we can all agree that it was a failed socio economic experiment

as a summary , what you seed is what you get and most importantly being truly red pilled is about knowing and accepting the human nature , not to say that women are hoes

women are how they are and in different circumstances would have been caring , loving and supportive to their man
 
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Slowhandluke

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This happens because the average guy accepts the old average woman

feminisem is already at the 3rd generation . If men 2 generations ago would have not accepted this , women would have stopped behaving like they do now

men did not do that and started simping as a mechanism of survival

since women can hoe around without baring any consequences ofc they do not care and start having this crazy demands

a guy that trades his entire existence for some old smelling vagina does not deserve any treatment . He deserves what he gets

and also coming to the average guy , the average guy did not do anything . He mainly died in the wars of the rich and powerful so they can accumulate more wealth

so makes no sense to glorify someone like that . The world was changed by a handful of people , not because of the average guy .

the only time when the average guy was glorified was during communism , and we can all agree that it was a failed socio economic experiment

as a summary , what you seed is what you get and most importantly being truly red pilled is about knowing and accepting the human nature , not to say that women are hoes

women are how they are and in different circumstances would have been caring , loving and supportive to their man

So according to you, average men suck. They deserve everything coming to them. Since only a few exceptional men change the world, those are the only men that count. Therefore average woman should get with those few exceptional men even though he will pump and dump her since in our society polygamy is looked down up and in a lot of places illegal.

Also, average women, once you are done getting pumped and dumped by the handful of exceptional men and your looks have faded; have your box of wine ready, be sure to obtain some cats/dogs and be happy at home watching TV, sad and lonely? Without a family.. without a spouse.. without meaning?

What kind of mystical bullshiet is this? I also don't understand your statement on communism. Average men being capable and deserving of average women have nothing to do with communism. Lots of society have average men pairing off with average women, but yet those societies are not communist. If that was the case, than almost all society would be communist because in almost all societies woman and men pair off.

Men have created a society that if full of abundance as compared to the past. Starvation is almost a thing of a past EVEN though just a few generations ago, it was a real threat. Men have created a cleaner environment (indoor plumbing, sewage system, etc)... and they as a group for the most part maintain this environment for society.

Take away the average man from society, and society will fall. A lot of those average women who complain that average men are not good enough, they would be on their knees asking for why their foods aren't on the store shelves... why the roads are no longer working.. or why they don't have any heat or air in their houses.

Shiet, do a Thanos snap on the average man, and western society would fall. Do that Thanos snap on the average woman, and society will still continue. Albeit, a more depressing, and less passionate world. Fewer family... fewer opportunities for the average man to exercise his abilities to protect and to provide. But as a group, the average man will survive.

Throughout history.. For hundreds and thousands of years. The average woman paired off with the average man. During this time most of these men were NOT 6 feet tall. Were not making 6 figures.. or even have a fancy car. But yet, those people hooked up. They had a family. They enjoyed their life together until one of them died. What's up with the average women's attitude today? Why isn't the average man good for her today while in the past he was?
 

Bigpapa

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So according to you, average men suck. They deserve everything coming to them. Since only a few exceptional men change the world, those are the only men that count. Therefore average woman should get with those few exceptional men even though he will pump and dump her since in our society polygamy is looked down up and in a lot of places illegal.

Also, average women, once you are done getting pumped and dumped by the handful of exceptional men and your looks have faded; have your box of wine ready, be sure to obtain some cats/dogs and be happy at home watching TV, sad and lonely? Without a family.. without a spouse.. without meaning?

What kind of mystical bullshiet is this? I also don't understand your statement on communism. Average men being capable and deserving of average women have nothing to do with communism. Lots of society have average men pairing off with average women, but yet those societies are not communist. If that was the case, than almost all society would be communist because in almost all societies woman and men pair off.

Men have created a society that if full of abundance as compared to the past. Starvation is almost a thing of a past EVEN though just a few generations ago, it was a real threat. Men have created a cleaner environment (indoor plumbing, sewage system, etc)... and they as a group for the most part maintain this environment for society.

Take away the average man from society, and society will fall. A lot of those average women who complain that average men are not good enough, they would be on their knees asking for why their foods aren't on the store shelves... why the roads are no longer working.. or why they don't have any heat or air in their houses.

Shiet, do a Thanos snap on the average man, and western society would fall. Do that Thanos snap on the average woman, and society will still continue. Albeit, a more depressing, and less passionate world. Fewer family... fewer opportunities for the average man to exercise his abilities to protect and to provide. But as a group, the average man will survive.

Throughout history.. For hundreds and thousands of years. The average woman paired off with the average man. During this time most of these men were NOT 6 feet tall. Were not making 6 figures.. or even have a fancy car. But yet, those people hooked up. They had a family. They enjoyed their life together until one of them died. What's up with the average women's attitude today? Why isn't the average man good for her today while in the past he was?
man , no offense … but your ancestors were not happy living together . There might be some that were , but most of them were not . They were marrying for money between them first of all . Not that different than nowadays :)

have no idea what is this romantic view on the old time , but human beings were sh1t 3k years ago and are sh1t also in present days

back In the days Also knowledge about how to build things for example were passed from generation to generation ( masonry for example )

it was quite a binary thing , either you were a farmer ( in most cases having the same rights as a slave or slightly better than a slave ) , either you were born in the higher echelon

dunno from where you got the idea that the average man built things . When it was peace he was working the fields for his master , and when it was war he was dying for his master

if you ask me , the average guy should be happy in present days that he does not have to work the fields , not to complain that women are difficult when basically they are giving them get out of jail free passes to hoe around during their youth years

to me the average guy entitlement to sleep with women is as cringy as the entitlement fat ugly women have to date male models

this is the circle of life and always it has been

men display and women choose

if you are not good enough you have to become good enough

the average guy in present days only simps and becomes a sex tourist , he does not want to improve . He is obsessed with respect , money and status . Things that he is not really putting any effort towards to

sorry man , but this is not something worthy of respect both from other men and women
 
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Slowhandluke

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man , no offense … but your ancestors were not happy living together . There might be some that were , but most of them were not . They were marrying for money between them first of all . Not that different than nowadays :)

have no idea what is this romantic view on the old time , but human beings were sh1t 3k years ago and are sh1t also in present days
That's a nihilist opinion... You must be fun at parties. :) Why even bother with seduction at this point? The warm comfort of empty, timeless space sounds much more interesting than this current construct that we are living in ;-) hahahahahahah
 

Pierce.Manhammer

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Been there bro, I feel ya. Last night I finally blocked my version of your gal. She’ll probably email me begging back, but **** her. Such a shame great piece of arse.

Just walk it ain’t worth it.


So my BPD LTR ended today, posted about it last year and ended up staying with her for another year. I rationalised it by assuming her out of control behaviour was just typical woman stuff and the sex was great, probably the best Ive had so that kept me going.

So normal behaviour for her is starting a fight (usually out of nothing), grabbing all her things (and any gifts she has given me) storming out of the house and going no contact for days sometimes up to a week. I used to call her during these breaks but found out pretty quickly that it just made it worse so now I deal with it by doing nothing and eventually she calls me back pretending nothing happened and nothings wrong. We bang and hang for about another week then she'll start that process again. I could go into details about the BPD craziness but thats not on topic.

Lately its been getting worse, fighting over more stupid **** then usual (thats saying something) and the level of disrespect is getting brutal. Previously I was able to deploy a level of stoicism, grit my teeth and wait for the storm to pass but this new level is starting to get to me. Im losing my ****, yelling back etc and today's breakup was a direct result from that. The question is what to do from here?

Her BPD will force her to reach out eventually but probably not before she starts monkey branching (she ended up ****ing some guy last year after one of these breakups which I forgave as I was doing the same because technically we were broken up). I mean is my standard to low or is this normal woman behaviour?

Is there anyway to get this thing on track or should I just get over it? Its day 1 so Im feeling miserable and if she called now I probably would take her back.
 

Foe

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Been there bro, I feel ya. Last night I finally blocked my version of your gal. She’ll probably email me begging back, but **** her. Such a shame great piece of arse.

Just walk it ain’t worth it.
What happened? What was it that finally made you block her? I miss my great piece of ass man, god damn she was hot. Saw mine on bumble this morning, that's a total of three days it took her to start up the single life. Its kind of funny cause she asked me once how long it would take to get over her and I said probably about a month, she got so offended yet here she is three days later.....
 

Bigpapa

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That's a nihilist opinion... You must be fun at parties. :) Why even bother with seduction at this point? The warm comfort of empty, timeless space sounds much more interesting than this current construct that we are living in ;-) hahahahahahah
I do not take things seriously , that is the entire catch

life is too serious to take it seriously

same thing with the career . When I was young I want to prove myself , make money etc

people were afraid of me and my career stalled . Since I started not caring my career exploded

same thing with women , I do not care if I sleep with them or not , but I always push for sex and things improved massively because women can smell when you are too eager and will try to stall it so they can negotiate the best deal for them

that is why playing the lover card and not the boyfriend one is the most rewarding card that you can play with women

basically what chads or bad boys do

it is not nihilistic view , it is a stoic one
 

Slowhandluke

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it is not nihilistic view , it is a stoic one
Most of your opinion regarding the average man/woman and about relationships are at irrational; are not based on facts (you barely specify any while I hint at numerous scientific studies). Instead, these opinions come off as being very emotional, very Misanthropic.

Stoic people are very rational and not emotional. They see how the world is base on facts and to a lot of people they seem ambivalent about the world. You don't seem to fill this definition by your posts.



Your posts verge on nihilism, but definitely come off as being Misanthropic. Your hatred and disgust with the common man is palpable. This is not how a stoic should act or feel.

Whatever, you be you. Perhaps your posts do not really reflect who you are, but going only by your postings, you lean more towards being a misanthropist.
 

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Bigpapa

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Most of your opinion regarding the average man/woman and about relationships are at irrational; are not based on facts (you barely specify any while I hint at numerous scientific studies). Instead, these opinions come off as being very emotional, very Misanthropic.

Stoic people are very rational and not emotional. They see how the world is base on facts and to a lot of people they seem ambivalent about the world. You don't seem to fill this definition by your posts.



Your posts verge on nihilism, but definitely come off as being Misanthropic. Your hatred and disgust with the common man is palpable. This is not how a stoic should act or feel.

Whatever, you be you. Perhaps your posts do not really reflect who you are, but going only by your postings, you lean more towards being a misanthropist.
Read the history , then come back with something relevant

right now you only have an emotional response to something that you never thought about and you do not like , as most likely it will just destroy whatever universe you built for yourself if you would accept
 

Slowhandluke

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Read the history , then come back with something relevant

right now you only have an emotional response to something that you never thought about and you do not like , as most likely it will just destroy whatever universe you built for yourself if you would accept
These are the facts I mentioned and that you could easily verify:

1) studies show in arranged marriages, the people report higher levels of happies.
2) more men work within jobs that support western culture infrastructure (like building roads, trucking food, plumbing, etc.)
3)there are more societies throughout history that have men pairing of with women. Other forms of relationships are a minority.
4) average men are AVERAGE by definition. This hasn't changed throughout time. This is the same for the AVERAGE woman.
5) the majority of cultures throughout history, the woman submitted to the man.
6) Presently, societies that practice feminist ideas are a minority. Ideas like woman should sleep around.. talk back to their husbands, etc.. these ideas are not practice by the majority of society TODAY. Feminism is not rampant in China, it's not rampant in India, eastern europe, asia, etc..


The above are just some of the facts I have posted in this thread. you on the other hand, rely on grand statements and opinions based on your views personal views like the following excerpts:

"man , no offense … but your ancestors were not happy living together . There might be some that were , but most of them were not . They were marrying for money between them first of all . Not that different than nowadays :)

have no idea what is this romantic view on the old time , but human beings were sh1t 3k years ago and are sh1t also in present days "

A lot of what you say is very emotional. Based a lot on assumptions that lean towards either being nihilist or misanthropic. How do you know our ancestors were happy or not happy living together? According to a lot of biographies and old written records (the bible, koran, stone tablets, papaya scripts) , people did seem to want to pair up. Obviously, your last statement from the excerpt is very emotional and very misanthropic.

You can say your a stoic. I don't think you know what that word means.

 
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