"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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On Pregnancy

TheBandito

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Gents and other creatures,

I have been enjoying myself over in the fitness section, highly recommend it :D Good guys over there. To the core matter of my post, I got a girl pregnant. We have been in an open relationship and riding bareback, things happen. You're welcome to rant. I'm not writing this post to take a rant about my choices but just let people know what I did so they have somewhere to start. First talk of pregnancy was when the condom was about to come off. I asked what she thought and of the consequences. We both agreed to deal with pregnancy with abortion and STD's in a rational manner. I got a text last nite saying we need to talk. Talk is good gents, trust me. I rang her and asked what about. Took her a bit and she said she was pregnant. I said this was a subject that required a talk and walk. I met her and we talked about her test and what she had already done. She had seen family planning and had a test by a doc. Doc said she was pregnant and seven weeks along. This explained why she felt sick and some of her grumpiness. I asked her about her abortion options with how far she had been along and timeframes. I listened to this and the rest of the story and gave my input on what I needed to. She has another appointment next Tuesday.

So that's the story so far. She didn't react badly or very emotionally as I didn't either. What I have learned so far is this is our problem not just her problem. We made a choice and we will go through this together. When you hear "I'm pregnant" it's not the end of the world. Remain calm. See her in person and talk about it in a rational manner. Keep your emotions as far away as possible. She wanted trust, and someone to look after her. This one of the big steps towards growing up as I am now responsible for someone else in a much bigger scale. Be a nice guy, throw any pick up **** out the window and fess up. It's my turn to grow up and be responsible.

I may add more to try and make a whole picture for the folks of the forum.

Good nite,
The Bandito
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

classy broadside

Don Juan
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Consider:

1. How do you know it's yours?

2. Have you actually seen the test results?

3. Abortion really messes up a girl's head. Adoption might cause regret later on, especially if the kid comes looking for you. Hard choices indeed.
 

Warrior74

Master Don Juan
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TheBandito said:
G Be a nice guy, throw any pick up **** out the window and fess up. It's my turn to grow up and be responsible.

I want you to explain what you mean by be a nice guy, throw any pick up **** out the window and fess up.


What does that mean?

If you are an adult taking care of yourself you are already grown up and responsible. You are just taking on more responsiblity. That shaming language implies that you weren't before. Do you believe that you were a child and irresponsible before this pregnancy?


btw. I am a father, so I may have a slightly different view on this, which is why I ask.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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TheBandito

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I want you to explain what you mean by be a nice guy, throw any pick up **** out the window and fess up.


What does that mean?
I was running around **** in hand doing as I pleased. I really didn't think as to the consequences of my actions. We know many "adults" that live by themselves, aren't bankrupt, and have a missus but are they mature?
 

snowdog

Master Don Juan
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Some lyrics for you (these are actual real lyrics. The band's name is AC, which is short for two words that would get censored here. The name of the song is "You're pregnant, so I kicked you in the stomach":

There were no stairs to throw you down
There was no roof to throw you off
There were no coat hangers around
So I kicked you in the stomach



I'm sorry, I think this sh*t is funny, so I probably have a sick sense of humor haha.
 
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