So looking for some advise on my current situation. I hooked up with this girl a while back, maybe 7 months, and did not know at the time she had a boyfriend. Hooked up then went cold after that b/c just against my ideas. Anyway we stayed friends and just 3 months ago she broke up with him, their relationship was 3 years. She recently hit me up this week about hanging out and doing some studying, which was not out of the norm because we were friends throughout. Although after that its become a daily thing, this is the 3rd time we have gone out on these "study dates" in the past 2 weeks. I want to make moves but Im skeptical on how to proceed. Inviting her out to the bar is no big deal and shes down to drink with me anytime. Do i make the move while we are at the bar, on one of these study dates, or take her out to someplace then go in?
"The Kiss of Death Mistake"
You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?
Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.
One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.
Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Old Fling is back?
- Thread starter Swerve90
- Start date
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Krueg
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I'd be careful, she already cheated on her ex with you in the past. Now that their broken up.. she could just use you for sex, help get over her ex or make him jealous. If you only want to be fvck buddies let her know right up front. I dont think this chick is "girlfriend" material..
Appreciate the concern, I was thinking **** buddies and see where it goes. So I guess if i went that route the bar would be the scene of choice for that. I just got out of a relationship that was 2 years a few months back as well so its basically the same for each of us. My concern is that if I go for it to early, since their breakup was recent, that she might pull the " idk its just to early for me to be hooking up with other people" or some line that girls usually use after a night out with a guy to not hookup.
Krueg
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Well, she did reach out to you, showing some interests, but be warned who knows why she is running to you first. Will you be her next victim???
I'd play it cool and dont come off too strong and seem desperate..Think about if she is someone even worth investing your time with.. But, this is completely up to you.
I'd play it cool and dont come off too strong and seem desperate..Think about if she is someone even worth investing your time with.. But, this is completely up to you.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
TheSlasher
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You sound to me like you're trying to deny that you've got some feelings for this woman, judging by how you're secretly hoping for something more. But that's just a gut feeling for me, nothing more.Swerve90 said:
That's what you think right now. But things like this could take a complete 360 turn, you know. Tread lightly.Swerve90 said: