So looking for some advise on my current situation. I hooked up with this girl a while back, maybe 7 months, and did not know at the time she had a boyfriend. Hooked up then went cold after that b/c just against my ideas. Anyway we stayed friends and just 3 months ago she broke up with him, their relationship was 3 years. She recently hit me up this week about hanging out and doing some studying, which was not out of the norm because we were friends throughout. Although after that its become a daily thing, this is the 3rd time we have gone out on these "study dates" in the past 2 weeks. I want to make moves but Im skeptical on how to proceed. Inviting her out to the bar is no big deal and shes down to drink with me anytime. Do i make the move while we are at the bar, on one of these study dates, or take her out to someplace then go in?
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
Old Fling is back?
- Thread starter Swerve90
- Start date
"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Krueg
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2012
- Messages
- 1,278
- Reaction score
- 134
- Age
- 37
I'd be careful, she already cheated on her ex with you in the past. Now that their broken up.. she could just use you for sex, help get over her ex or make him jealous. If you only want to be fvck buddies let her know right up front. I dont think this chick is "girlfriend" material..
Appreciate the concern, I was thinking **** buddies and see where it goes. So I guess if i went that route the bar would be the scene of choice for that. I just got out of a relationship that was 2 years a few months back as well so its basically the same for each of us. My concern is that if I go for it to early, since their breakup was recent, that she might pull the " idk its just to early for me to be hooking up with other people" or some line that girls usually use after a night out with a guy to not hookup.
Krueg
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 6, 2012
- Messages
- 1,278
- Reaction score
- 134
- Age
- 37
Well, she did reach out to you, showing some interests, but be warned who knows why she is running to you first. Will you be her next victim???
I'd play it cool and dont come off too strong and seem desperate..Think about if she is someone even worth investing your time with.. But, this is completely up to you.
I'd play it cool and dont come off too strong and seem desperate..Think about if she is someone even worth investing your time with.. But, this is completely up to you.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
TheSlasher
Senior Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 5, 2014
- Messages
- 224
- Reaction score
- 11
You sound to me like you're trying to deny that you've got some feelings for this woman, judging by how you're secretly hoping for something more. But that's just a gut feeling for me, nothing more.Swerve90 said:
That's what you think right now. But things like this could take a complete 360 turn, you know. Tread lightly.Swerve90 said: