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allergictobs

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It's not really much of a mystery as to how couples meet, at least not according to the chart below. The data is 4 years old, so just assume roughly half or more of all couples meet 'online.'
Note that "online" may refer to many different things. I strongly doubt it's the swipe apps. This figure most likely includes asking an acquaintance to be a friend on facebook and starting to chat with them, meeting on different online social groups, online discussion forums, etc. Moreover, it includes older people who met their partner in their 40s or 50s.
 

SW15

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I doubt the veracity of the above mentioned graph as the shown final percentages add up to 113%…
In survey design, there is something called multiselect questions where respondents can select multiple answers to a question. With that said, I think that needed to a single select question where a respondent is only allowed one answer.

Something else to consider is that many young people, millenials and genz, are relatively picky compared to the generation of their parents. I can think of tons of examples of baby boomers who all settled into these super weird and dysfunctional marriages/relationships in order not to be single and alone. I personally always felt that their standards were pretty low in regards to selecting not only a mate but in regards to tolerated behaviors, which is one of the reasons their divorce rate was so high. Millenials grew up in divorced households and I personally feel their response to this was to be very selective with who they date and get into a relationship with, let alone marry or have children with. I can think of a few male boomers that were married and had kids who I guarantee would be totally dateless incels for the remainder of their lives if they were millenials lol.
As a Millennial, I would agree that Millennials tend to be fussier than Boomers or even Gen X. I don't foresee that changing much in Gen Z.

I agree that I have known Boomers that have had better relational histories with women on account of being Boomers and not Millennials. A beta male Boomer generally has had a better time in relationships than a beta male Millennial.

Millennials were the first large generation to grow up with divorce as a commonly established practice, though the smaller Gen X cohort was on the early wave of divorce as it was rising tremendously during the 1970s. There's been some fear of commitment among Millennials as a result of experiencing their Boomer parents divorcing during the 1990s.
 
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derby1

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I find @sangheilios to be an interesting case study because at 6'4" and muscular, that is the type of guy "on paper" that is supposed to melt panties just by being in the same room with them.
Im 6 foot 2 , I can tell you this women are over exposed.

nothing is special to them anymore.

I walked through the supermarket earlier I was heavily outnumbered by women, the only choosing signals i got was from 40+

men have devalued themselves so much, women dont care.
 

zekko

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Modern culture and dynamics have destroyed dating.
 

SW15

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Im 6 foot 2 , I can tell you this women are over exposed.

nothing is special to them anymore.

I walked through the supermarket earlier I was heavily outnumbered by women, the only choosing signals i got was from 40+

men have devalued themselves so much, women dont care.
There's a lot of talk about IOIs and choosing signals. I think they were more common prior to 2000, when Boomers and X'ers made up the majority of daters. I turned 18 in 2001 and became aware of the concept of IOI and signaling somewhere around 2001-02. Over time, I've looked for signals and I've never been impressed with the quantity of signals I received. Since 2001, I have never had a BMI above 25, so my weight has been normal.

I did see more choosing signals from 2002-2006 then I've seen in the years since. Even my 2002-2006 quantity disappointed me and most of that period was spent as an undergraduate in college. Since the smartphone and earbuds gained popularity, I've seen my choosing signals fall. I've come to the conclusion that Millennial women are poor at signaling.

When I moved to a new city in 2011, I soon made friends with a 6'4", white former college athlete in a non-major sport. At this point, he was racking up many notches. He was running spam game at night. He never made one day approach. Whereas I have always valued the IOI/choosing signal, he never did. He acknowledged that women in our age bracket (we're both earlier Millennials) are typical not good at signaling. Because of this, he figured that he'd run spam game. He didn't see much benefit in waiting for any woman to signal him. He's a 6'4" guy so if he's acknowledged a decade ago that signaling isn't great, then there's an issue with signaling amongst the younger generations of women.

Things have only gotten worse since that 2011-12 era conversation. In 2012, I remember having a conversation with my uncle about how I noticed women's behavior had gotten worse since the 2004-05 era.
 

derby1

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When I moved to a new city in 2011, I soon made friends with a 6'4", white former college athlete in a non-major sport. At this point, he was racking up many notches. He was running spam game at night. He never made one day approach. Whereas I have always valued the IOI/choosing signal, he never did. He acknowledged that women in our age bracket (we're both earlier Millennials) are typical not good at signaling. Because of this, he figured that he'd run spam game. He didn't see much benefit in waiting for any woman to signal him. He's a 6'4" guy so if he's acknowledged a decade ago that signaling isn't great, then there's an issue with signaling amongst the younger generations of women.
he had a good idea,

my observation wasnt looking to run game, it was an observation that women D.G.A.F anymore. Even fat toxic chics have been railed by a muscular stud at some point.

women have fake abundance, its quite tragic.
 

SW15

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it was an observation that women D.G.A.F anymore. Even fat toxic chics have been railed by a muscular stud at some point.

women have fake abundance, its quite tragic.
I agree with the observation.

I'm not sure I'd call the abundance fake. The abudance comes from a global surplus of men in the 20s/30s age range and tech assisted platforms. In 1990, women had far fewer options when they dated so their standards and evaluating of their own worth in the marketplace were more realistic. Any woman now putting herself out on a website (if older) or swipe app (the 21-45 age set) now has hundreds of options at any time whereas her 1990 equivalent would be lucky to have 5 options at any time.

The surplus of men has led to men dating down to get laid. So yes, subpar looking chicks have been railed by above average looking men and they think that they are entitled to the rating caliber of man that has pumped and dumped them.
 

zekko

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I'm not sure I'd call the abundance fake.
I think what he's saying is that while a low value woman might always be able to find a hot guy to rail her, she's not going to be able to secure a LTR with him. Of course, she may not even care about that, depending on what phase of life she is in. And there are also women who will always avoid attachments throughout life. They were somewhat rare in my day, but I'm guessing they are more plentiful now.
 

lost_blackbird

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What percentage out of the 100% are just done with it all and are just vol-cels? I can't be the only one
who doesn't want sex/relationship/companionship... I've said it before, I simply don't like todays
women, they're just fvcking awful. A wet hole isn't enough reward for putting up with their bollocks.
 

sangheilios

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There's a lot of talk about IOIs and choosing signals. I think they were more common prior to 2000, when Boomers and X'ers made up the majority of daters. I turned 18 in 2001 and became aware of the concept of IOI and signaling somewhere around 2001-02. Over time, I've looked for signals and I've never been impressed with the quantity of signals I received. Since 2001, I have never had a BMI above 25, so my weight has been normal.

I did see more choosing signals from 2002-2006 then I've seen in the years since. Even my 2002-2006 quantity disappointed me and most of that period was spent as an undergraduate in college. Since the smartphone and earbuds gained popularity, I've seen my choosing signals fall. I've come to the conclusion that Millennial women are poor at signaling.

When I moved to a new city in 2011, I soon made friends with a 6'4", white former college athlete in a non-major sport. At this point, he was racking up many notches. He was running spam game at night. He never made one day approach. Whereas I have always valued the IOI/choosing signal, he never did. He acknowledged that women in our age bracket (we're both earlier Millennials) are typical not good at signaling. Because of this, he figured that he'd run spam game. He didn't see much benefit in waiting for any woman to signal him. He's a 6'4" guy so if he's acknowledged a decade ago that signaling isn't great, then there's an issue with signaling amongst the younger generations of women.

Things have only gotten worse since that 2011-12 era conversation. In 2012, I remember having a conversation with my uncle about how I noticed women's behavior had gotten worse since the 2004-05 era.
A lot of women have really bad social skills, particularly with men, which is a result of all of these things you've mentioned. A few years back I approached this woman at the gym who constantly made eye contact with me, she was around 22 or 23. Anyway, the interaction was a bit awkward and I went for the number, to which she said she had a bf. I then said "It was nice to meet you" and walked away. This woman literally would go out of her way to approach me, flirt, smile, etc. and after a couple months I tried again, as any man would. She rejected it and had 0 clue why she was getting asked out lol. She was just an attention ***** but she was so social miscalibrated that she didn't understand her own behavior, how it was causing mixed signals and that she had been leading on a man that had made a quite clear exit after getting rejected.
 

SW15

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What percentage out of the 100% are just done with it all and are just vol-cels?
Isn't vol-cel MGTOW?

All incels are MGTOWs but not all MGTOWs are incels.

Anyway, MGTOW is growing. I don't identify with MGTOW at all but the community has a couple of ideas that make sense.

I think what he's saying is that while a low value woman might always be able to find a hot guy to rail her, she's not going to be able to secure a LTR with him. Of course, she may not even care about that, depending on what phase of life she is in. And there are also women who will always avoid attachments throughout life. They were somewhat rare in my day, but I'm guessing they are more plentiful now.
That makes sense. That's part of the growing number of female insols. Insols are different than incels. Insols usually have an active social life with their female friends and are able to get laid without much difficulty.

Millennials are good at avoiding attachments. The percentage of never married, childless at age 35 is higher than it was in past generations. In the 2020s, there's going to be a wave of Millennials turning 40 without ever having been married or having had children.

A lot of women have really bad social skills, particularly with men, which is a result of all of these things you've mentioned. A few years back I approached this woman at the gym who constantly made eye contact with me, she was around 22 or 23. Anyway, the interaction was a bit awkward and I went for the number, to which she said she had a bf. I then said "It was nice to meet you" and walked away. This woman literally would go out of her way to approach me, flirt, smile, etc. and after a couple months I tried again, as any man would. She rejected it and had 0 clue why she was getting asked out lol. She was just an attention ***** but she was so social miscalibrated that she didn't understand her own behavior, how it was causing mixed signals and that she had been leading on a man that had made a quite clear exit after getting rejected.
Women are credited as the gender with superior social skills.

There have been times where I approached women at the grocery store who couldn't seem to process the occurence of a man starting a conversation with them in public for the purposes of romance.

It is best to always push back when you get the "I Have a Boyfriend" line. A good portion of the time, the relationship is fictional. Also, many times, the relationship isn't on good footing and there's an opportunity. Google "boyfriend destroyer lines" for help with that. I know you are referring to a past incident, but you will hear this line again.

I agree that we're seeing worse social skills among Millennial women, who can struggle to operate outside of the tech world.
 
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timmyroni

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There's a lot of talk about IOIs and choosing signals. I think they were more common prior to 2000,

Things have only gotten worse since that 2011-12 era conversation.
I've had the opposite experience in that I've seen IOI's and in particular female approaches, skyrocket in the same period, esp. in the 2010's.

Everyone has been inundated with explicit hardcore porn but also with softcore porn in mainstream media 24/7 for decades now. Women are not immune to these influences and my impression is that (prior to 2020 for obvious reasons) women are far more sexualized and assertive than ever.

Before 2020, I was regularly accustomed to having multiple women often a half dozen or more, either approach me or show blatant signs of sexual interest in a single night. Often it was more than that.

It was getting to the point that I was getting totally passive, never approaching and yet women would come to me with regularity. One night I was doing nothing as usual in a bar, and within 15 minutes of closing, I was surrounded by a group of a half dozen girls or more who had all surrounded me and were grinding on me from every angle.

I live outside of a major metro area, and this oddly enough probably works to my advantage where there aren't as many single younger good looking men.


What percentage out of the 100% are just done with it all and are just vol-cels? I can't be the only one
who doesn't want sex/relationship/companionship... I've said it before, I simply don't like todays
women, they're just fvcking awful. A wet hole isn't enough reward for putting up with their bollocks.
I noticed the behavior of women becoming insufferable around 2018 or so. Too much to go into here, but just about every woman I met over the age of 25 was pegging the crazy meter so hard conversations became utterly pointless.

As in hyper-aggressive, passive-aggressive, extremely blatant cheating, entitlement overload, getting enraged if you acted too quickly, enraged if you didn't act quickly enough, total unpredictable, trigger-sensitive insanity.
 
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SW15

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I live outside of a major metro area, and this oddly enough probably works to my advantage where there aren't as many single younger good looking men.
Yes, that helps. Women in major metro areas are inundated by attention and they tend to be more apathetic towards men. I didn't notice this apathy until the 2010s in my current city. I've made the apathy observation before and I have had other men in my personal life tell me without prompting that they've experienced an increase in female apathy during the 2010s. Since 2001, I have been in mid-sized or large metro areas. The larger the metro area, the worse women typically behave.
 

DonJuanjr

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Isn't vol-cel MGTOW?

All incels are MGTOWs but not all MGTOWs are incels.
I would agree that all volcels are MGTOW. But not incels. Incels are not choosing to go their own way. Players can be MGTOW also, if they are interested in pump and dump only. I would say @DEEZEDBRAH is MGTOW.

At least based on the original idea MGTOW.
 

lost_blackbird

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Oh I won't try and pretend my own social skills aren't almost completely non existent. I have just
two or three friends in the the whole wide world, both of whom live well over 100 miles away from me.
I blurt things out in social situations that just make people think "this guy is a weirdo..." and I can see
it on their faces but by then the damage is done. Not everyone is wired to be a social animal, I'm
certainly not. I have taught myself over the years that I am not compatible with other people, be they
friends, colleagues or potential romantic interests. It's easier to just draw a line under it all and remove
any expectation or hope that things can be any different than they have always been for me.
It keeps me from getting hurt, betrayed and rejected if I pre-reject everybody first. I keep some kind
of control that way. Perfect example, I was at a pub on Saturday night with one of my friends from miles
away and spot a brunette on another table who was aesthetically appealing to me. I pointed her out
to my mate and said as much to him. He replied "Come on, lets go over there and talk to her." which
I flatly refused to do despite him trying for the next 20 minutes to talk me into it. He couldn't understand
why I wasn't having any of it and stayed firmly in my seat. I had already made my mind up that -
a. She wouldn't appreciate me lumbering over there and bothering her.
b. I'm too old for a young girl like that.
c. She would think I was a creep.
and
d. She's probably a complete fvucking b1tch anyway.
Job done, I stayed sat where I was and finished my beer, leaving my mate somewhat exasperated with
my actions or more notably lack of them.
 

Velasco

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I soon made friends with a 6'4", white former college athlete in a non-major sport. At this point, he was racking up many notches. He was running spam game at night. He never made one day approach. Whereas I have always valued the IOI/choosing signal, he never did. He acknowledged that women in our age bracket (we're both earlier Millennials) are typical not good at signaling. Because of this, he figured that he'd run spam game. He didn't see much benefit in waiting for any woman to signal him. He's a 6'4" guy so if he's acknowledged a decade ago that signaling isn't great, then there's an issue with signaling amongst the younger generations of women.
Maybe has something to do with not starting actively going out to pickup women until 2015, but I've never been good at noticing signals. I just approach who I think will be receptive and is down to fck. Maybe my subconscious sees something I don't see, but if it can see it, then I'm not too concerned with not being able to consciously recognize signals.

Anyway. I see some shaming language here with regards to your friend's success (read: actually getting laid), so I'll address them.

"Spam game"

Reality: spam game actually increases your odds of finding a girl who is receptive to you. When you only approach girls who signal you, you may think you are being more efficient ("got laid after only approaching 3 girls. That's a 1 in 3 hook-to-lay ratio, while my friend had to approach 10 girls to get laid. So therefore I have better game than him, cuz for me it takes less girls to approach in order to get laid") but in reality is less efficient because 1) as you've noted, girls are sht at signaling (girls that may have been receptive to you, you ignored only because she didn't send signals) and 2) false signals).

"never made one day approach"

The implication here, as I'm well aware you like to preach on here, is that daygame is real game. Reality: out of all the ways of meeting women (daygame, nightgame, social circle game, online game), daygame is by far the worst in terms of racking up notches (inb4, muh quality. That title goes to social circle game. Not daygame).
 

Velasco

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I was at a pub on Saturday night with one of my friends from miles
away and spot a brunette on another table who was aesthetically appealing to me. I pointed her out
to my mate and said as much to him. He replied "Come on, lets go over there and talk to her." which
I flatly refused to do despite him trying for the next 20 minutes to talk me into it. He couldn't understand
why I wasn't having any of it and stayed firmly in my seat. I had already made my mind up that -
a. She wouldn't appreciate me lumbering over there and bothering her.
b. I'm too old for a young girl like that.
c. She would think I was a creep.
and
d. She's probably a complete fvucking b1tch anyway.
Job done, I stayed sat where I was and finished my beer, leaving my mate somewhat exasperated with
my actions or more notably lack of them.
 

corrector

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Im 6 foot 2 , I can tell you this women are over exposed.

nothing is special to them anymore.

I walked through the supermarket earlier I was heavily outnumbered by women, the only choosing signals i got was from 40+

men have devalued themselves so much, women dont care.
What part of the world is this?
 
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