"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Read more...

Need help gaming a shy 21 year old hb 8.5

Niterider450

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 13, 2014
Messages
49
Reaction score
2
I met this tall hot chic about a month ago. I am very attracted to her and she seems interested but she is extremely shy and acts as if she has been abused all her life. She has very bad body language and is afraid to open up? I am trying to take baby steps with her. Any advice?
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

Warrior74

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 25, 2008
Messages
5,106
Reaction score
230
Sounds like too much work to me. I'd let it simmer on the back burner (aka baby steps) while I did other more important things/women.
 

apprenticedj

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Sep 17, 2013
Messages
416
Reaction score
43
Location
The Golden State, USA
Warrior has it right, don't put a ton of effort into this one. Work the long game with her, the seed is planted, now slowly water it. This isn't a problem if you're banging other girls, you're mind will be occupied and your needs will be fulfilled.
 

Niterider450

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 13, 2014
Messages
49
Reaction score
2
I got several other girls I'm currently talking to. I am just very attracted to her.
 

Victory Unlimited

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 3, 2005
Messages
1,357
Reaction score
313
Location
On the Frontlines
Niterider450,


We understand that you're attracted to her---BUT, you also said she's interested in you. Then you went on to describe her as shy, closed off, bad body language, and uncommunicative.

So my question is:

Where is the evidence that you've found that SHE'S actually interested in YOU?

If the evidence is all in your imagination, then I suggest that's where you LEAVE your interest in HER---until she shows you otherwise.


V.U.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

VladPatton

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 26, 2012
Messages
3,246
Reaction score
232
Location
NYC
Drop it, she's damaged goods and you're going to need extra time to get anywhere with her. In that time frame you can be going out with a chick that's definitely into you, bangs you, and is mad fun. I say leave it alone and don't sign up to be her psychiatrist.
 

Malcontent

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Mar 15, 2014
Messages
206
Reaction score
51
VladPatton said:
Drop it, she's damaged goods and you're going to need extra time to get anywhere with her. In that time frame you can be going out with a chick that's definitely into you, bangs you, and is mad fun. I say leave it alone and don't sign up to be her psychiatrist.

^^Yes. You could be setting yourself up for white knightedness if you head down the road of trying to get her to change her behavior. Don't accept the challenge she presents.
 

Niterider450

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 13, 2014
Messages
49
Reaction score
2
Victory Unlimited said:
Niterider450,


We understand that you're attracted to her---BUT, you also said she's interested in you. Then you went on to describe her as shy, closed off, bad body language, and uncommunicative.

So my question is:

Where is the evidence that you've found that SHE'S actually interested in YOU?

If the evidence is all in your imagination, then I suggest that's where you LEAVE your interest in HER---until she shows you otherwise.


V.U.
She does talk to me and smile at me while I'm talking to her and her facial expressions appear to be positive while I'm talking to her.
 

VikingKing

Banned
Joined
May 17, 2013
Messages
2,148
Reaction score
89
Location
America is best
Hang out with her alone and see what happens. You haven't been on one date? If so, what happened?

I mean all you said is you met a hot tall chic a month ago. Ok good for you. But if you dont give details, how can you get advice?
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

Niterider450

Don Juan
Joined
Feb 13, 2014
Messages
49
Reaction score
2
noobolgy said:
Hang out with her alone and see what happens. You haven't been on one date? If so, what happened?

I mean all you said is you met a hot tall chic a month ago. Ok good for you. But if you dont give details, how can you get advice?
I have not got her on a date yet. Like I said she is very timid and shy and she always looks down and is slumped over and never looks anyone in the eye(except me) so something has hurt her along the way. That's why I;m taking baby steps with her.
 
Top