"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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Need help gaming a shy 21 year old hb 8.5

Niterider450

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I met this tall hot chic about a month ago. I am very attracted to her and she seems interested but she is extremely shy and acts as if she has been abused all her life. She has very bad body language and is afraid to open up? I am trying to take baby steps with her. Any advice?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Warrior74

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Sounds like too much work to me. I'd let it simmer on the back burner (aka baby steps) while I did other more important things/women.
 

apprenticedj

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Warrior has it right, don't put a ton of effort into this one. Work the long game with her, the seed is planted, now slowly water it. This isn't a problem if you're banging other girls, you're mind will be occupied and your needs will be fulfilled.
 

Niterider450

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I got several other girls I'm currently talking to. I am just very attracted to her.
 

Victory Unlimited

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Niterider450,


We understand that you're attracted to her---BUT, you also said she's interested in you. Then you went on to describe her as shy, closed off, bad body language, and uncommunicative.

So my question is:

Where is the evidence that you've found that SHE'S actually interested in YOU?

If the evidence is all in your imagination, then I suggest that's where you LEAVE your interest in HER---until she shows you otherwise.


V.U.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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VladPatton

Master Don Juan
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Drop it, she's damaged goods and you're going to need extra time to get anywhere with her. In that time frame you can be going out with a chick that's definitely into you, bangs you, and is mad fun. I say leave it alone and don't sign up to be her psychiatrist.
 

Malcontent

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VladPatton said:
Drop it, she's damaged goods and you're going to need extra time to get anywhere with her. In that time frame you can be going out with a chick that's definitely into you, bangs you, and is mad fun. I say leave it alone and don't sign up to be her psychiatrist.

^^Yes. You could be setting yourself up for white knightedness if you head down the road of trying to get her to change her behavior. Don't accept the challenge she presents.
 

Niterider450

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Victory Unlimited said:
Niterider450,


We understand that you're attracted to her---BUT, you also said she's interested in you. Then you went on to describe her as shy, closed off, bad body language, and uncommunicative.

So my question is:

Where is the evidence that you've found that SHE'S actually interested in YOU?

If the evidence is all in your imagination, then I suggest that's where you LEAVE your interest in HER---until she shows you otherwise.


V.U.
She does talk to me and smile at me while I'm talking to her and her facial expressions appear to be positive while I'm talking to her.
 

VikingKing

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Hang out with her alone and see what happens. You haven't been on one date? If so, what happened?

I mean all you said is you met a hot tall chic a month ago. Ok good for you. But if you dont give details, how can you get advice?
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Niterider450

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noobolgy said:
Hang out with her alone and see what happens. You haven't been on one date? If so, what happened?

I mean all you said is you met a hot tall chic a month ago. Ok good for you. But if you dont give details, how can you get advice?
I have not got her on a date yet. Like I said she is very timid and shy and she always looks down and is slumped over and never looks anyone in the eye(except me) so something has hurt her along the way. That's why I;m taking baby steps with her.
 
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