"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Need a Recover From This

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Sikanhe

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Hello fellow DJs,

Got to knew HB8 from a female friend two weeks back. From hangout with our friends together, she was pretty quite and cold. However, when we were alone she won't stop talking. Last wedsday, I asked HB8 to go clubbing last week. She accepted, but she insisted on bring that friend to go with her so I ended up uninviting her and go with my buds. NC since the uninvite.

Anyone want to give me read on the situation/ proceeding for escalation?

Sik
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Sikanhe

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An update on the situation.

This is between HB8, her friend, and me last friday.

While in a somewhat casual conversation, HB8 complains to her friend in front of me that she is looking for a guy who can get her a passionate relationship. Her friend directly recommends me to her as a good candidate. I smile to the friend and say, "thank you, that is a very nice offer". Meanwhile giving HB8 a glance, she blushes and tries to cover her face with her phone. I did not escalate anything that day and not show too much interest.

Given the situation above how would you fellow DJs recommend proceed?

Sik
 
marmel75

marmel75

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Sikanhe said:
An update on the situation.

This is between HB8, her friend, and me last friday.

While in a somewhat casual conversation, HB8 complains to her friend in front of me that she is looking for a guy who can get her a passionate relationship. Her friend directly recommends me to her as a good candidate. I smile to the friend and say, "thank you, that is a very nice offer". Meanwhile giving HB8 a glance, she blushes and tries to cover her face with her phone. I did not escalate anything that day and not show too much interest.

Given the situation above how would you fellow DJs recommend proceed?

Sik
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You came off as a clueless wimp, congratulations.

Meanwhile while you are wondering how to escalate when she basically threw it in your lap, she is probably banging a real man senseless.

I would have grabbed her away from the friend she was talking to and said "Oh, you mean passionate like this?" And gave her a long, passionate kiss.
 
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apprenticedj

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My suggestion would be to make a damn move my friend!!!! Lol

I would say invite her to the club again, preferably alone, and get that cutie on the dancefloor. Start dancing and work your way into a grind, show her that you're interested in her sexually by your ACTIONS not your WORDS.

Most importantly: you must make a move the NEXT time you hangout. If you keep just being polite and friendly you may find yourself in the friendzone. You DON'T want to be there!

You've done well so far, now you gotta step it up. :up:
 
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Sikanhe

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Noted, I agree with you Marmel I ****ed up that situation and I should have definitely gone aggressive for that. Will be asking her to go out to a lounge for some drinks this weekend, and I will update you guys on it. Thank you guys for the input.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Sikanhe

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Update:

First of all gonna let you fellas know I was shot down. Let me know if I made more mistakes.

Started from a message in the group chat of her asking for someone to go shop with her, but the following is a between me and her.

Sik: Shopping on a Wednesday afternoon huh, what happened to work?
HB8: I am taking the afternoon off, quite bored.
Sik: Shopping is nice, get to go out and relax a bit.
HB8: Haha ya, work has been busy and I have been home a lot.
Sik: Girls who stay home a lot lose their beauty you know.
HB8: I am feeling that way already.
Sik: Do you have something you need to buy? Otherwise, I have a proposition for you.
HB8: I really enjoy shopping, the stuff on display makes me happy haha. What is your proposition.
Sik: Head for home and make yourself look pretty. I will take you out for some fun tonight.
HB8:I am going to go shopping, I am on my way there already haha,
Sik: Your loss
HB8:Haha, how so?
Sik: Looks like you will never find out
HB8:Haha, next time. I am almost there already.

The End

Let me know if I ****ed up more
 
marmel75

marmel75

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That hurt to read that exchange...I don't even know what to say...
 
Rainman4707

Rainman4707

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The way I operate is get phone number. Here's the difference between me & a few posters on SS though. There is a couple threads I've read where the guy is at high school or uni & see's the chicks he's interested in. I don't The only time I see them is when I meet up with them. Just thought I'd mention that. Anyway OP she now knows you're interested so play it cool for a week & see if she counter offers :)
 
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Sikanhe

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marmel75 said:
That hurt to read that exchange...I don't even know what to say...
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Go Ahead point me out, let my mistake be a lesson to all
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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marmel75

marmel75

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Stop trying so hard...its not attractive...

I don't really see a recovery from this...maybe be her friend and go after some of her friends in a better manner...maybe she will get jealous, who knows
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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