"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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My girlfriend..the female version of a DJ..your thoughts

shark

Senior Don Juan
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Yah it started off where she seemed to be the total AFC. I used my DJ tactics and she became the chasing, AFC girl. Well we were together and after some months I stop being too tough of a DJ and started showing a little more effection and being nicer while still keeping my distance, and making her chase a little.

Anyway, more and more she is starting to turn into the DJ. She seems to ALWAYS be busy..and she is where I am usually pretending (i do a good job of it). She'll go somehwhere and not care if people are with her she'll just go and have fun doing whatever. She doesn't call or msg me excessivly. She acts upset when i do something mean or wrong, but she'll never let it ruin her night TOO much. Only anti-DJ thing of her is she'll apoligze whenever she is "kinda" wrong, as where if I am wrong or w/e..i NEVER EVER apoligize and get away with it.

Now how do I handle her? Do I take someones advice who said it's OK to let her to have some of the power for some time..but then i have to take it back which balanaces the power in our relationship?

OH YEAH--im thinking about this b/c i was talking to one of my friends (not good friend) and he was her x-boyfriend and he said somtin like do you ever talk on the phone, and how she NEVER would initiate phone calls or convo.

Advice needed..thanks guys
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Tazman

Master Don Juan
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Never stop being DJ, most times it will backfire. Compromise is good sometimes, but you should maintain your position of dominance at all times without being too "controlling."
 

shark

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I feel like i am mainting my power, however, before it was me with power + her kinda chasing me more. Now theres not much chase on her part and DJ techniques from both of us..

I feel like were both acting cold towards eachother.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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