MrConfidences thread

[dannowillbookem]

how is it weird to ask a girl how her weekend was on monday?

 

[MrConfidence]

how is it weird to ask a girl how her weekend was on monday?

I meant on any other day than Monday, because most likely, she might of forgotten about it by then.

 

[GaryUranga]

turn it into something funny then, you can go "how was your weekend?" of friday and turn it into something funny because its out of place, just have fun. I know what you mean when you feel really confident and you just FEEL like you can do things.

BTW, some advice, Ive been trying it lately, just about getting good people skills, DD's friend mentioned it, go over to people and have a short conversation doesnt matter how long, just go over to someone talk for 30 secs then leave, do it more and more often, soon youll be able to have longer conversations, if you keep doing itsoon youll be able to handle longer conversations with everyone, will probably take a few months.

 

[MrConfidence]

Thanks for the advice Gary. Not much progress today, those girls apparently didn't care enough to sit next to me today, so I'm pretty much going to forget about them, because I don't have time to be worrying about them, when I could be making friends with other people. There was also this Asian freshman girl on the bus that I tried to approach, but she ignored me, so guess what? Next(Even if she didn't purposefully ignore me, just aint got the time to be worrying. There are plenty of other girls out there that the Mike man could be gaming.)

 

[MrConfidence]

Well, today before band practice, I was just experimenting on the piano, and this girl named Marissa(One of the hottest girls in school IMO), comes up to me, and starts telling me about how she plays piano. Blah blah blah, she shows what she knows on the piano, and I say "Well, you could work on your piano skills" she says something I can't really remember, than I say "Maybe when you get better, we can get together and jam together", and she just says "Yeah" and sort of laughs. Heh, basically after that, I guess she wanted to play piano together with me, but I wasn't really feeling it, because I hardly knew sh*t about the piano. Basically after that she basically gets up, and goes with her group. But why approach me out of the guys in band? Had some other guy been playing the piano, would she have approached him? That's why I doubt she really has any attraction towards me; perhaps she was just bored, and needed a random guy to talk to. Something that surprised me though, was even though she was one of the hottest chicks in the school, I wasn't at all nervous with her. The question also arises, if she WAS interested in me, would we really connect? I really wasn't feeling the whole piano thing. Most likely though, she wasn't interested in me, and she's probably going to act like I don't exist tommorow, like all chicks do(Talk to you one day, act like you don't exist the next day). So yeah, I know you guys obviously can't give me a definite answer, but based on the information I've given you, do you think she might be attracted to me?

 

[GaryUranga]

I'll comment on the acting like you dont exist thing, when girls do it I ignore them even harder, talk to various people, showing off my social proof, did this with 1 chick that ignored me for like 2 weeks though we spent lots of forced time together cause we have friends in common at school, today she staes at me the whole time and plays with her hair, the usual crap, I feel sorry for people like that.

 

[Mr_rogers]

Well, today before band practice, I was just experimenting on the piano, and this girl named Marissa(One of the hottest girls in school IMO), comes up to me, and starts telling me about how she plays piano. Blah blah blah, she shows what she knows on the piano, and I say "Well, you could work on your piano skills" she says something I can't really remember, than I say "Maybe when you get better, we can get together and jam together", and she just says "Yeah" and sort of laughs. Heh, basically after that, I guess she wanted to play piano together with me, but I wasn't really feeling it, because I hardly knew sh*t about the piano. Basically after that she basically gets up, and goes with her group. But why approach me out of the guys in band? Had some other guy been playing the piano, would she have approached him? That's why I doubt she really has any attraction towards me; perhaps she was just bored, and needed a random guy to talk to. Something that surprised me though, was even though she was one of the hottest chicks in the school, I wasn't at all nervous with her. The question also arises, if she WAS interested in me, would we really connect? I really wasn't feeling the whole piano thing. Most likely though, she wasn't interested in me, and she's probably going to act like I don't exist tommorow, like all chicks do(Talk to you one day, act like you don't exist the next day). So yeah, I know you guys obviously can't give me a definite answer, but based on the information I've given you, do you think she might be attracted to me?

She might have been... but she might not have. Overally, I wouldn't really worry about it. Just try talking to her tomorrow. If you get any sort of reaction, then you're good. Otherwise, keep up the good work. You're doing awesome.:rockon:

 

[MrConfidence]

She might have been... but she might not have. Overally, I wouldn't really worry about it. Just try talking to her tomorrow. If you get any sort of reaction, then you're good. Otherwise, keep up the good work. You're doing awesome.:rockon:

Thanks for your input man, although since I have this thing where I only go to band class 2 days a week, and to the games, and practices, I won't see her until Friday before the game. Still, when that time comes, I'll make sure to talk to her. Besides, if anyone acts like a jerk to me, calls me gay, or a girl tries acting like a ***** to me, I won't care, because hey, one of the hottest chicks in the school approached ME. Although, I have been getting a little oneitis over this girl ever since she approached me, definitely something I gotta get over. Ever since I approached her, I've also been getting a little desperate. Still, I just have to work on my inner game, and I'll probably get those 2 things.

 

[Mr_rogers]

Thanks for your input man, although since I have this thing where I only go to band class 2 days a week, and to the games, and practices, I won't see her until Friday before the game. Still, when that time comes, I'll make sure to talk to her. Besides, if anyone acts like a jerk to me, calls me gay, or a girl tries acting like a ***** to me, I won't care, because hey, one of the hottest chicks in the school approached ME. Although, I have been getting a little oneitis over this girl ever since she approached me, definitely something I gotta get over. Ever since I approached her, I've also been getting a little desperate. Still, I just have to work on my inner game, and I'll probably get those 2 things.

Yup, sounds good. Remember: Best way to prevent oneitis is to spend time with plenty of attractive ladies. Pook's Fifteen Lessons talks about that in detail.

Good luck, and keep up the good work.

 

[MrConfidence]

Again, thanks a lot for the advice. However, I love how once I actually start making progress, all those guys who use to flame me, and call me a troll dissapear.

 

[MrConfidence]

Hmm, I'd still like to see others input on this.

 

[MrConfidence]

Girls are a problem for me, but I've got a lot more problems with my inner game, that, if fixed, could help me become more comfortable with approaching women, and overall, more comfortable with myself. First of all, I'm not confident, no matter how many times I try to tell myself, "I'm the great chance", or "That girl would be lucky to get with a guy like me", I still have inner doubt, and make up excuses not to approach her. I play 4 different instruments, program, play sports, and am good with video games, but I'm still not confident. So how do I adapt a real state of confidence? What can I do to make myself more confident? Thanks for your input. This problem goes hand, and hand with the fact that I care too much, no matter how many times I try to convince myself not to care. So how do you adapt that 'devil-may-care' attitude, and stop giving a sh*t about what everyone is thinking? What can I do to help myself adapt this attitude? Simply telling myself isn't enough. I want to be that dude that doesn't care about rejection, doesn't care if others think he's weird, doesn't feel the need to impress others and is confident. Yes, I've read the bible, yes, I've read over advice, but simply reading this stuff isn't doing it for me. I need some way that I can make myself belief this stuff. Anyone who says I didn't ask any questions obviously hasn't read the whole topic.

 

[Patrick124]

glad you're admitting that. basically we told you this for a while though.

anyways great ways to get confident is to achieve success, but since thats not an option right here, I'll suggest my little rituals that make em feel great about myself. For one, get some nice clothes, always wear an outfit that makes u feel fresh. I know i have a few shirts that make me feel dead sexy in em lol.
And seriously go to the gym and lift. lifting makes you a) schieve goals one step at a time, and boy does it feel *great* and b) it actually gets noticed by girls fairly quick.
listen to comedians. when I am laughing, i cant help but smiling, and therefor I'm in a good mood and i'll vibe onto other people n lighten the mood w/e. plsu it will subconciously teach you how to tell funny stories n whatnot.
good luck.

 

[WesCottII]

I think spelling and punctuation might be a good start.

For a second point, how can we make you believe it? The only way you can believe it, is to become it.

 

[MrConfidence]

glad you're admitting that. basically we told you this for a while though.

anyways great ways to get confident is to achieve success, but since thats not an option right here, I'll suggest my little rituals that make em feel great about myself. For one, get some nice clothes, always wear an outfit that makes u feel fresh. I know i have a few shirts that make me feel dead sexy in em lol.
And seriously go to the gym and lift. lifting makes you a) schieve goals one step at a time, and boy does it feel *great* and b) it actually gets noticed by girls fairly quick.
listen to comedians. when I am laughing, i cant help but smiling, and therefor I'm in a good mood and i'll vibe onto other people n lighten the mood w/e. plsu it will subconciously teach you how to tell funny stories n whatnot.
good luck.

I already dress pretty well, but I'll try to start lifting weights. The only reason I'm hesitant about doing it, is because I've done it in the past, and I haven't seen much results.
I'll also try the listening to comedians thing.

I think spelling and punctuation might be a good start.

For a second point, how can we make you believe it? The only way you can believe it, is to become it.

Haha, no. There's nothing wrong with my punctuation, and I made ONE typo.

And you can't just become it. Even if you're approaching all these hot girls, and acting like you don't care, deep inside you'll still care, and you won't be acting like yourself.

 

[Patrick124]

thats the whole problems with kids who lift, they lift, dont see instant results, and then decide its not for them. thats the wrong mentality. People dotn get jacked in a year, people get jack in 2-3 years. it takes time, but once you realzie you're getting stronger and bigger muscles, you'll feel like $1million.

 

[MrConfidence]

thats the whole problems with kids who lift, they lift, dont see instant results, and then decide its not for them. thats the wrong mentality. People dotn get jacked in a year, people get jack in 2-3 years. it takes time, but once you realzie you're getting stronger and bigger muscles, you'll feel like $1million.

2-3 years? Well that's probably not going to help me in high school since I'm already a junior, and only have one more year after this.

 

[WesCottII]

And you can't just become it. Even if you're approaching all these hot girls, and acting like you don't care, deep inside you'll still care, and you won't be acting like yourself.

Habit creates reality. I was scared of rejection, I got rejected and found out it doesn't hurt. It changed me. I don't care now.

 

[MrConfidence]

Habit creates reality. I was scared of rejection, I got rejected and found out it doesn't hurt. It changed me. I don't care now.

But I can't approach girls for sh*t, I'm too afraid she'll give me the typical sh*t that most girls give me, and we won't go anywere(We have a convo, but we don't go anywhere. Or I try to start conversation, it doesn't go anywhere).

 

[WesCottII]

But I can't approach girls for sh*t, I'm too afraid she'll give me the typical sh*t that most girls give me, and we won't go anywere(We have a convo, but we don't go anywhere. Or I try to start conversation, it doesn't go anywhere).

And you could learn to ride a bike? Write? Drive? straight away? No, you kept trying until you got it.

Could I approach and get girls when I first started? Could I b*llocks. After about 100 failed approaches, I learned.