noviceplaya
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2003
- Messages
- 36
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I told this girl i wanted to get to know her and she said i was moving to fast. Do u think this was an excuse or was i movin to fast. Wat should i saw if i am movin to fast?
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
"moving to fast"
- Thread starter noviceplaya
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Two options, not enough info, it depends what you were doing. If your hands were down her panties when you had this conversation - you were moving too fast. If you were asking her out on a date she was not interested YET.
UniqueSoul
Don Juan
it's the most natural part of us humans- although we seem to want the whole deal right here, right now, we REALLY enjoy exploration n working in order to get sth. this apllies here nicely too- no one says you'll be exposed to some dull n long period for her to make up her mind (chicks hit ya SOO unexpectedly after saying they wanna wait just 3days ago- "umm, well, i just didn't have anything to do, so i ran thru my contacts n i remembered u n blablabla..."), but it'll be more fun to work on this step by step (not baby steps, by all means).
just let her get comfortable with the idea of getting into some-level relationship wit u. it won't take long. it ain't about INTEREST currently. the only one n real interest she's gonna feel is when u'll start systematically makin her "nothin without u".
not too straight, but true. relax. she'll be yours.
just let her get comfortable with the idea of getting into some-level relationship wit u. it won't take long. it ain't about INTEREST currently. the only one n real interest she's gonna feel is when u'll start systematically makin her "nothin without u".
not too straight, but true. relax. she'll be yours.
I'm not sure what your point was in all that incoherent rambling, but if the dude is saying "I want to get to know you better" and the girl tells him "You're moving too fast" then I can guarantee she's not going to be his. There is no initial interest to build on.Originally posted by UniqueSoul
it's the most natural part of us humans- although we seem to want the whole deal right here, right now, we REALLY enjoy exploration n working in order to get sth. this apllies here nicely too- no one says you'll be exposed to some dull n long period for her to make up her mind (chicks hit ya SOO unexpectedly after saying they wanna wait just 3days ago- "umm, well, i just didn't have anything to do, so i ran thru my contacts n i remembered u n blablabla..."), but it'll be more fun to work on this step by step (not baby steps, by all means).
just let her get comfortable with the idea of getting into some-level relationship wit u. it won't take long. it ain't about INTEREST currently. the only one n real interest she's gonna feel is when u'll start systematically makin her "nothin without u".
not too straight, but true. relax. she'll be yours.
"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
UniqueSoul
Don Juan
hmmmh... worked well for me. it was just the same situation-
I: "so we're gonna continue this tommorow, right?"
SHE: "umm, no, I really do not think so. it's kinda too fast. let's wait a lil bit. maybe some other night. bye"
ME: "bye." (in my mind, "oh ****. i did it. but she doesn't want to get back to this right after 20hours, so what now?...")
***
five days later...
one "let's give it a try" evening. one hottie indeed in my command. even i myself realised that way later than it happened.
I: "so we're gonna continue this tommorow, right?"
SHE: "umm, no, I really do not think so. it's kinda too fast. let's wait a lil bit. maybe some other night. bye"
ME: "bye." (in my mind, "oh ****. i did it. but she doesn't want to get back to this right after 20hours, so what now?...")
***
five days later...
one "let's give it a try" evening. one hottie indeed in my command. even i myself realised that way later than it happened.
Nah, but my point is (unless the original post was poorly explained) this guy NEVER REALLY MADE A MOVE. If you're putting your hands up a girl's shirt and she says "you're moving too fast" then it is a legitimate thing to say on her part, and yes, the guy might still have a chance.
But lets take a look at what he told us. If you make the comment to a girl that "I want to get to know you better" and she comes back with "you're moving too fast" then that is not legitimate, it's total bullsh*t.
If "getting to know you better" is "moving too fast", I think it's pretty clear that "moving at the right speed" for this girl means "never talking to her again".
But lets take a look at what he told us. If you make the comment to a girl that "I want to get to know you better" and she comes back with "you're moving too fast" then that is not legitimate, it's total bullsh*t.
If "getting to know you better" is "moving too fast", I think it's pretty clear that "moving at the right speed" for this girl means "never talking to her again".
UniqueSoul
Don Juan
then, mr. novice should start posting in detail in order to get a detailed answer.
but in that case where it was just as brief as he depicted it, well, it's too lame even for an excuse.
but in that case where it was just as brief as he depicted it, well, it's too lame even for an excuse.
That has absolutely nothing to do with his situation at all. The reason she said "you're moving too fast" is because you tried to make another date the day after the pervious one, which is dumb. Saying "I want to get to know you" then her saying "you're moving too fast" is a rejection line, plain and simple. Move on.Originally posted by UniqueSoul
hmmmh... worked well for me. it was just the same situation-
I: "so we're gonna continue this tommorow, right?"
SHE: "umm, no, I really do not think so. it's kinda too fast. let's wait a lil bit. maybe some other night. bye"
ME: "bye." (in my mind, "oh ****. i did it. but she doesn't want to get back to this right after 20hours, so what now?...")
***
five days later...
one "let's give it a try" evening. one hottie indeed in my command. even i myself realised that way later than it happened.
evol_andre
Don Juan
- Joined
- Apr 16, 2004
- Messages
- 10
- Reaction score
- 0
- Age
- 40
she jsut wants to be frends with you cause shes think that way or she doesn't like, so wat its her lose!!!!
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.