noviceplaya
Don Juan
- Joined
- Jul 15, 2003
- Messages
- 36
- Reaction score
- 0
I told this girl i wanted to get to know her and she said i was moving to fast. Do u think this was an excuse or was i movin to fast. Wat should i saw if i am movin to fast?
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.
She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.
Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.
So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.
The words come later. The impression comes first.
I'm not sure what your point was in all that incoherent rambling, but if the dude is saying "I want to get to know you better" and the girl tells him "You're moving too fast" then I can guarantee she's not going to be his. There is no initial interest to build on.Originally posted by UniqueSoul
it's the most natural part of us humans- although we seem to want the whole deal right here, right now, we REALLY enjoy exploration n working in order to get sth. this apllies here nicely too- no one says you'll be exposed to some dull n long period for her to make up her mind (chicks hit ya SOO unexpectedly after saying they wanna wait just 3days ago- "umm, well, i just didn't have anything to do, so i ran thru my contacts n i remembered u n blablabla..."), but it'll be more fun to work on this step by step (not baby steps, by all means).
just let her get comfortable with the idea of getting into some-level relationship wit u. it won't take long. it ain't about INTEREST currently. the only one n real interest she's gonna feel is when u'll start systematically makin her "nothin without u".
not too straight, but true. relax. she'll be yours.
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
That has absolutely nothing to do with his situation at all. The reason she said "you're moving too fast" is because you tried to make another date the day after the pervious one, which is dumb. Saying "I want to get to know you" then her saying "you're moving too fast" is a rejection line, plain and simple. Move on.Originally posted by UniqueSoul
hmmmh... worked well for me. it was just the same situation-
I: "so we're gonna continue this tommorow, right?"
SHE: "umm, no, I really do not think so. it's kinda too fast. let's wait a lil bit. maybe some other night. bye"
ME: "bye." (in my mind, "oh ****. i did it. but she doesn't want to get back to this right after 20hours, so what now?...")
***
five days later...
one "let's give it a try" evening. one hottie indeed in my command. even i myself realised that way later than it happened.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.