smoothtalker72
Don Juan
- Joined
- Mar 31, 2008
- Messages
- 131
- Reaction score
- 1
how do you pull it off, especially if your both actually interested in the movie
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."
You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.
She's been waiting forty minutes.
Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
Thats Gold. Use this for sure bro.Five To One said:Accually I enjoy leaning in and whispering into her ear, "watch this"
And then I do one of those yawns and put my arm around her.
Its funny becasuse it is so rediculous looking. I usually follow it up with "I can see your impressed by how smooth I am" in a serious tone as their laughing.
She will think its funny and you will have your arm around her
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Why do you make it harder? Start the "date" before the movie and do some stuff. Next, if you want you can tell her to come and see a movie.(If you still want to do this.)that is difficult when the date starts out at the movies (i know bad idea) and you havent really had a chance to get to the point where she would be comfortable with holding your hand
If you can't put your arm around her shoulder, (i think it is uncomfortable too), you can just put it around her waist? Thats what I dosmoothtalker72 said:well i was going to the movies and invited her. i guess we coulda went to the mall tho since it was a relatively early movie
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Solid.Five To One said:Accually I enjoy leaning in and whispering into her ear, "watch this"
And then I do one of those yawns and put my arm around her.
Its funny becasuse it is so rediculous looking. I usually follow it up with "I can see your impressed by how smooth I am" in a serious tone as their laughing.
She will think its funny and you will have your arm around her