Modro's Self Improvement Quest!

[Bonhomme]

Bloody hell, it does look like you're hung up on her.

Yeah, you may need to just avoid her completely until you're over her. In absence of other prosepects, doing other things to take your mind off her is goood. Especially physical activities that will get you tired out at the end of the day.

If you're having bad dreams you may have to up your vitamin B-complex (especially B-6) and vitamin C a bit. That helps me to have more enjoyable dreams. Neurotransmitters have a lot to do with one's moods.

 

[Modro]

yeah i take vitamin A+C+D pill every day, im ok now i just felt like i wanted to vent as i got a bit confused and seeing her for the first time was difficult.

I managed to arrange going out to a club tomorrow and meeting a friend to watch the england game also.

The thing is i know there are going to be up and down times and i want you all to see them and not just me pretending im ok all the time because sometimes your not,

I posted the card through her door and went to the cinema i got a text from her saying thanks and asking a question about someone (had they had their baby yet) but i havnt replied and i think im not going to for today at least. I am looking forward to tomorrow now as i will get some oppurtunities and i can get a bit drunk for the first time in a while too.

 

[Modro]

1. Destroying Social Phobias
2. Authentic Confidence
3. Essence of Alpha
4. Empower Your Voice
5. Mastering Body Language
6. Boosting Mind States
7. Always Be Prepared
8. The Power of Detachment
9. Freestyling Street Approaches
10. The Art of Phone Openers

So far thats what i have read, if you want to get knowledge and tips on improving yourself and your game i cannot stress how good weapons of mass seduction is. Once i have got through all 19 i will be re-reading certain sections. I do one at a time so i can take it in and there isnt too much information.

I am going to chill out for the rest of the day and watch a DVD, this is because i stressed out earlier in the day but i didnt do anything stupid which i am proud of. I decided to DO something about the lack of people to go to clubs with, I'm not saying i am a loser with no friends but currently of my friends alot are either very busy, too poor or dont live near here at the moment.

So tomorrow i have 2 meetings with different friends and i am going to have a good time, It also allows me to be soical with them and have good conversations when previously i would be the entertainment with supid voices or being weird for a laugh, its time to be more mature even with my friends and stop hiding behind the 'clown' mentality. It is nice to get advice and encouragement on here though to keep me going through the rough patches

 

[Modro]

So day 7 of week 2:

I got conversation #9 out the way early, on the way out i had to get a taxi on my own to meet up with everyone, and i spoke with him the whole way there about his job and betting and the TV in his taxi ETC pretty cool.

I got to the pub and i was very alpha in a fun way we started to play on the game machine there (its called an IT box) and we were all working as a team to try and answer the questions or play spot the difference. i was in the center and they were asking what games to play ETC and i knew 1 person really well and met one of the others once, there was about 6 of us playing.

It was a girls birthday and i spoke to her briefly about films and stuff and there was obviously several group conversations which i was fully apart of. We then went to the club, and it was a great night out i wasnt concentrating on getting a girl, but having fun i even danced most the night and before i would NEVER go on the dance floor unless totally ****ed. I nearly got grinding with this hot girl but i didnt take charge and grab her round the waist, but i said hi to 2 girls as we were walking through the crowd. just for a laugh, i did alot of eye contacts and smiles and got some good responces.

Not only that but i made some connections and we are going out again tonight! and so it seems i have got some new buddies who treat me with respect and they love me. They also dont seem to have ladies so hopefully they can wing with me. Sweet!

 

[Modro]

Week 2 Tasks:

- Continue eye contact and smile
DONE
- Continue phone conversations from week one.
DONE
- Make sure i go to the gym on a regular basis and work hard.
DONE
- Initiate 10 conversations with strangers
DONE
- Work on my speaking( slowing down, pause, voice, clear, fun)
WIP
- Read more of Weapons of Mass Seduction
DONE

* Also hoping to actually go out to a club as i havn't been out with a group for AGES and dont really have a group i can most my friends at the moment are 'work, sports or hangout/ pub and not, lets go get drunk in a club types' I know i would really have good progress there.
DONE


A good week again, apart from the blip with the ex, it was a bit up and down but finished with a high and i did get all my conversations in which i am proud of, my social interactions have increased alot and i am getting involved and getting people talking which before i would never do. The gym is also going well, i have decided to have at least 2 days off a week as i went 6 times this week. I am also trying to eat more protien and cut fat intake down, and maybe get some protien suppliments soon.

 

[Modro]

Week 3 Tasks:

- Read more of Weapons of Mass Seduction
- Go to the Gym 4-5 times + look into suppliments/better diet
- 5 conversations with Strangers (minimum)
- Initiate 1 conversation with a girl at club/ try a number close
- Increase social network with new group (ie. make it a regular thing)
- Keep working on my speaking( slowing down, pause, voice, clear, fun)
- Continue eye contact + Phone conversations(when at work)

 

[Bonhomme]

All right, mate. Doing good, keep it up.

 

[Modro]

Week 3 Day 1:

BOOOOOOOOOO

My night out got cancelled as too many had ran out of cash (to be fair i had a mere 14 pounds for the night lol) So instead i just chilled out at home and watched a comedy movie, I also read section 11 of WOMS, took a break from the gym today. A pretty quiet sunday

 

[Modro]

Week 3 Day 2:

Today was a good day, I got in my first 2 conversations of the week, first was a different sandwhich lady (we have 3 that come every day) about 2 minutes long i stayed and chatted for a little bit after i brought my sandwhich, asked how she was and if she had a good weekend, been busy ETC. (shes about 30+ too old) and i wished her a good day when i left and she said the same back very light good vibe/ friendly. (Conversation #1)

I then went in and said good morning to the receptionist, who i spoke to in the kitchen before, normally i would just walk past and not say anything.


My second conversation of the day, was a lady in HSBC bank i had to transfer some money so i could get petrol asked her about her day and if it had been busy, she said it was picking up at lunch time but thats expected. bit more fluff and details of the exchange then i leave, open the door for someone eye contact smile, them ' Thank you' me ' No problem at all' big smile and head up high as i leave.

I then go to get some food and on the way there an HB 7 nice denim skirt ok face short looked about 20 coming towards me i hold eye contact and smile, she gets all embarressed then looks directly at my penis area! i was like holy **** lol after i had gone past. She seemed so innocent too lol

I also had a look around an online site (free one) today just to see if anyone was interesting on there, sent a few messages but its more a case of just chatting to people, as i have said before chatting online isnt really going to help me improve myself.

Edit: I also read section 12 of WOMS

 

[Modro]

Day 3: I honestly cant remember what happened, i went to the gym, and messaged a few people on that dating site, nothing much, i go to the gym with my buddy now so its good to have someone to hang out there with.

Day 4:

My eye contact smile is becoming a natural thing for me now i have no fear i love doing it, today i went upstairs at work and this HB 9 was walking towards me i hold eye contact and she smiles at me and i do it back straight away (Great feeling btw)

Also at the gym this HB about 8.5 lookst about 16-18 years old though i held eye contact then smiled as i walked past her on the bike. She looked at me a few times. Also when i was walking through the bar area (its a tennis club with a gym upstairs) a caught a girl about 20 HB8 checking me out twice as i went by and i smiled at her.

I also got in 3 conversations today to complete my minimum conversations with strangers, one was a attendent at the gym, i tweaked my shoulder and just strtching it nursing it a little she asked am i ok, i answeed confidently and acting like it was nothing, and it was fine after a few minutes. I also saw a dude that was like 12 when i was at school who got the bus home but i dont really know him, i spoke to him in the changing room asked him what he was up too, (last year of school now) and he asked me what i was doing, then i told him some stuff and ejected as i was ready to go. I also spoke to someone about my P45 form and how it was all faded and the process she had to do know, Also the sandwhich lady again but she isnt counted.

Part of my goal this week was to go to the gym at least 4-5 times, and get diet information. I have posted on the Health and fitness forum what i eat and what i should eat before and after work outs so hopefully i get some good information, first impressions i need to eat ALOT more and add more protien to my diet. so i might get Whey suppliments perhaps.

Tonight no ice hockey again i am too poor, but going to watch England play poor football down the pub with the guy i go to the gym with. Hopefully i can be social and see some people we know and i can practice my group participation. I feel like i am becoming ready to start to step up a bit more in the difficulty, IE. appoaching the eye contact girls and number closing or in a club go for the grind or make out, which i have never been able to do ever. I was so afraid of getting rejection/didnt know what to do to get to that position. After my reading of WOSM i feel i have more of a clue and with my new body coming along i feel more confident. Going to read the next section today also

 

[Nighthawk]

Don't be afraid to to clubs on your own. Go out a couple of times a week. Good work!

 

[Modro]

well when i first broke up with the ex, i went out about 3 times on my own just to go out, i felt a bit loserish, even when i went to the cinema for the first time ever on my own i also felt a bit odd...

when i go out i like to be with a girl or friends so they experience the fun and feed of eachover/everyone. Its a bit more fun. But i see what your saying i do need to make sure i do more going out, pubs clubs or even just going to the cinema or going somewhere. so point noted i'll work on it. One of my goals this week was to establish social connection for going out which i have kinda done with the people i went out with on Saturday, as everyone will have been paid this week and we are definately going out Sunday and i hope to go out with someone else on saturday and see some people out who are back from uni at easter time.

 

[Modro]

Week3 Day 5:

Today i did my first, eye contact and said hi to someone, i am really enjoying giving and holding eye contact at the moment and smiling of course, i love the feeling if it goes well and it really pumps you up, it makes me feel like I'm getting somewhere when before i would avoid it at all costs now i am actively searching it out.

I read section 13 and 14 today of WOMS

I feel i am becoming very socialable to people i know, at football or on the phone at work or w/e just making that little bit more conversation or just being more open and fun without having to worry about someone else thinking about your actions

Online update: So far 3 girls have messaged me 1 has potential, one cannot physically write a ssentence lol i will paste the message she sent me.

"lol ya im k ya das me dog n na it dnt eat peaple lol wuu2 xxxx "]

WHAT THE HELL lol

 

[Modro]

Week3 day 6:

Tis a grand friday night, and i am infact going out today, not sure where i will end up, but i got paid today so i brought a new pair of jeans and a really awesome new t-shirt which i shall be wearing tonight. I love having new clothes to go out in gives you that little extra buzz

Today one of my good friends at work commented on how im such a flirt on the phone which is cool, i want people to think things like that about me. So that was a nice compliment.

Started eating a bit more and got to the gym today for a good session, i think i have put on about 3 pounds of muscle so far (1.8weeks), when i could never seem to gain anything before (too much cardio, nowhere near enough food/protein) Still got to keep going and step up the amount of weights.

 

[Modro]

Week 3 Day 7:

I'm feeling absoloutly awesome right now, that girl i messaged a few times on plenty of fish, hot about an 8, looks to have a real nice body. Well she messaged me back for the second time so i told her to add me to MSN,

i logged on just now and she starts talking to me on there straight away, i warmed her up a little and number closed and left straight away. I know its online but i'm really excited about this first taste of success so to speak, i also have a new potential target on there as well who seems interested and it at least an 8.

Im just happy that i did a few C + f messages, then i led the situations TELLING her to add me which she did, then i left on a high point on MSN got the number and will hopefully be on my way to a date. Which i hope to go ice skating for the reason i want to practice/ Im ok at skating (due to ice hockey) and also fantastic kino oppurtunity with out too much conversation pressure + its fun.

Yesterday on my night out it was kinda lame, i joined up with the group it was a work thing and they were bowling, i wasnt playing so i had to watch but i spoke to my friends and a few of their collegues, we then went to the club i couldnt get drunk as i had ate alot and started late, but i went on the dancefloor again for ages. Thats the good thing about them they always go on there and i copy there moves a little, I still felt awkward at times but i just went out there and had fun.

i got kinoed by some girl in there group who put her arm round me twice, i just did it back to her then kept on dancing (wasnt sure if she had a feller in the group didnt want to step on any toes)

Also i got left with a girl in the group about a 5, very average face but a little chubby, so i was dancing next to her for a while while we were waiting for a ride home from someone dropping people home, so i suggested waiting outside (so i could practice talking) It was a good conversation about 20 minutes, she was asking thing about me alot and i detected a slight level of interest, but i honestly wasnt interested.

Also an update on my ex side of things, i have felt fine and havnt spoken to her since the 23rd where i didnt reply to her text. Im still getting over her but things arnt too bad in the grand scheme of things, i realise she isnt coming back and i am feeling ready to step it up on the girls side of things, but i dont want to talk to her until i have some success with women otherwise i will seem like a loser waiting for her, plus i dont want to seem like im waiting for her/ cant get a girl. I will probably be her friend later on but not for the moment

 

[Modro]

- Read more of Weapons of Mass Seduction
Done (read 2 sections)

- Go to the Gym 4-5 times + look into suppliments/better diet
Done (Made a post got some info on the diet and went 5 times)

- 5 conversations with Strangers (minimum)
Done (I think i got up to about 7)

- Initiate 1 conversation with a girl at club/ try a number close
Done (spoke to a girl from the group and number closed online girl)

- Increase social network with new group (ie. make it a regular thing)
Done (Going out this sunday, starting to bond nicely in there)

- Keep working on my speaking( slowing down, pause, voice, clear, fun)
WIP (still working on this need to generate more rapport)

- Continue eye contact + Phone conversations(when at work)
Done (great eye contacts this week and conversations are fine)

 

[Modro]

Week 4 Tasks:

- Read more of Weapons of Mass Seduction (at least 2 sections)
- Go to the Gym 4-5 times
- 5 conversations with Strangers (minimum)
- Call Online girl, try and arrange a date
- Keep working on confidence on the dance floor and gaining new moves
- Keep working on my speaking( slowing down, pause, voice, clear, fun)
- Continue eye contact and smiles
- Phone conversations(when at work)
- Try to get at least 1 good conversation over 10 minites, generate rapport

* If said date gets arranged, i will put more tasks in.

 

[Bonhomme]

My eye contact smile is becoming a natural thing for me now i have no fear i love doing it, today i went upstairs at work and this HB 9 was walking towards me i hold eye contact and she smiles at me and i do it back straight away (Great feeling btw)

Well, all right, mate! Great!

Having this in your arsenal should be killer in clubs, shows, etc. Really makes you stand out.

i dont want to talk to her until i have some success with women otherwise i will seem like a loser waiting for her, plus i dont want to seem like im waiting for her/ cant get a girl. I will probably be her friend later on but not for the moment

That's a good attitude to have about her.

LOoks like things are coming along very well. Keep at it.

 

[Modro]

Just an update

As if by magic on mentioning her, she calls my phone.. I nearly picked up without looking who it was, then i realised who is was and i put the phone back on the table, she left a voicemail

'Hi its me sorry to bother you just wondering how your doing and how work has been, has xxxx had her baby yet, give me a call and i can ring you back i have free minutes'

havn't replied, any suggestions? total cut out for the moment? i am not texting or ringing her today and i will see what suggestions i get here but basically i feel like keep doing what i want to do.

I think by ignoring her again it will really get her questioning why i am, she hasnt exactly gone out of her way to speak to me or be friends and im not ready to be yet. I'm at a much better mind set now but the next time she sees me i want her to regret letting me go.

anyway going to head to the gym for a light session, any help is welcome.

Edit: She just tried ringing me againa few hours after the first call, left it again. im not going to be avaliable to her when she wants, but i do feel kinda bad. But it is for my own good

Editx2: She tried again about 10 mins after the last... I am going to go for a walk and leaving my phone and chill i dont want to start thinking about her again.

Edit 3x, tried calling me AGAIN about 2 hours after the last, she must be thinking wtf? haha

 

[Modro]

Well who would have known, i went for a walk and as i was going up a street, a girl i 'went out with' when i was like 10 (i was too scared to kiss or speak to her or even sit next to her LOL) pulls up outside her house, normally i would have kept on walking, pretending i didn't see her, or just wave and keep going. But i decided to stop and it turned into about a 15 minute conversation about loads of topics, me giving her a few neg hits in a fun way and loads of eye contact, she has a boyfriend and i didn't have my phone otherwise i would have number closed her for practice.

While she was not a stranger i havnt spoken/seen her for at least 3+ years but no regular contact since about 10 years ago. So it was great that i got one of my weeks goals out the way so quickly, to generate at least 1 conversation over 10 minutes. I felt how i wanted to act with people, funny interesting. I felt mature and good at talking i had great body language smiles and laughter and it really took my mind off of ignoring the ex's calls. Great start to the week and further proof to MYSELF that i am getting better slowly changing my avoiding ways.

Online update i got another 8 from online to add me on MSN the conversation was a bit up and down, as she wasnt replying back really quick so it didnt flow on MSN, i went for the number close just for the hell of it she lives probably too far away (maybe 1+ hours drive) for my liking, she replied 'im not giving it yet but i will talk to you more and i will.'

How did i take this? i left MSN asap (i have made a section for my prosepcts hehe) and thought it was funny but felt good she seems a little defensive has a bit of an Online shield going on, but at the same time i dont really care what happens and im just doing what feels good, I will prbably speak to her again if it goes well i will try again otherwise **** it.

The other girl i made sure i havnt spoken to on MSN i log on Offline so i dont have to speak, as i am going to be phoning her either tomorrow or the day after and asking her out. If anything its great practice and will be fun testing what i have learned so far