Men who declare exclusivity too soon?

[wifehunter]

In my opinion high-valued men never declare exclusivity.

Right, if you're a catch...she must catch you! Duh, beavis!!!

 

[ImTheDoubleGreatest!]

You're saying if you push for exclusivity, even if the girl accepts, but she still checks out/flirts with other guys, she's not REALLY into you?

It's not that. She just thinks that she can do better than you. She can still be really into you, but if she sees some other guy who she thinks is better than you, you will cease to exist.

 

[Krueg]

I asked for exclusion once, after three months of dating. She told me she wasnt sure or isnt ready so I dumped her; Then she came crying back, I was a "Nice Guy" and took her back. Then she dumped me a couple months later..

Women are more concerned about Relationships, Marriage, Kids... So when you wait for them to ask for Exclusion, you know she is Interested.

 

[nismo-4]

I never make the exclusive talk first. I keep my heart a good distance away. Sure, it's been years since my last LTR, but if they don't talk exclusive with me, neither will I.

Also don't move too fast, or you'll get dropped or friendzoned.

Never entertain exclusive talk unless sex has happened several times.

 

[bigneil]

Read something a little bit ago and I think is gold...

IT DOESN'T MATTER IF SHE'S THE ONE MOVING TOO FAST.........
If you go along with it......YOU'RE THE ONE who's gonna get punished.

True regarding commitments, not regarding sex. A man should have sex as soon as possible with a woman for psychological reasons.

 

[bigneil]

I never make the exclusive talk first. I keep my heart a good distance away. Sure, it's been years since my last LTR, but if they don't talk exclusive with me, neither will I.

Also don't move too fast, or you'll get dropped or friendzoned.

Never entertain exclusive talk unless sex has happened several times.

The first time I made love to my most recent girlfriend (versus sex) was about 10 weeks after we first had sex.

I accidentally implied I was talking about a commitment (I wasn't) and I literally saw the fear in her eyes. And lots of guys do this on the first date before ever having sex!

Five weeks later (week 15) she was the first to say "I love you" and she brought up the idea of exclusivity, saying "I love you, and I don't want to restrict you, but I don't want to think you are with other girls.." (I didn't agree to commit but neither of us has been with anyone new since).

So it goes:

1) Dating
2) Sex
3) Making Love
4) (Time)
5) She brings up commitment
6) You resist

It does NOT go:

1) On the first date he tells her she is not allowed to be with other men or else he declares her a no-good ho.

 

[Skyline]

I agree with @deesade

Obviously don't go looking for it with a girl that you barely know... Use some common sense at least.

If you're not looking for a relationship then don't bother ever bringing it up. Not all men value the same things.

But one thing that's universal is frame. I feel frame is far more important than asking a woman to be exclusive.

 

[bigneil]

If one more person uses the word frame on it's own I'm going to break something.

It's like saying: "I feel awesome is far more important than money". What's awesome? Frame in what context?

 

[Roober]

Punished how?

Women push for relationship early, you go along with it, you are likely to get dumped. If you are just supplicating, fall head over heels for her, then presume to be the pansy beta boy along for the relationship ride, she will get bored. You do things on your terms.