jhonny9546
Master Don Juan
Aaron’s view is largely based on the idea of the “old bargain”: the man provides and achieves, while the woman takes care of the home, supports him, and brings intimacy and companionship. But today, most of the practical things traditionally provided by a partner, cooking, cleaning, laundry, financial support, can be done independently or outsourced. (soon there might be robots doing that for you).
The same applies to women.
A mature man or woman should be able to take care of themselves and have their basic needs met without depending on a partner. Otherwise, the relationship is based on dependency.
Once two people are independent, what they truly need from each other is what they cannot fully provide themselves: companionship, intimacy, sex, affection, and a genuine emotional connection.
That, to me, is the real goal of a relationship/life.
You work on yourself, build a stable life, take care of your responsibilities, and eventually meet someone who has done the same.
At that point, you don't need a “trad wife” or a traditional provider role to justify the relationship.
If she enjoys cooking, cleaning, or taking care of you while you earn more, that's perfectly fine, but it's not the foundation.
The foundation should be genuine attraction, intimacy, companionship, and vulnerability.
Sex shouldn't be a chore or a form of manipulation, like in many LTR's and Marriages.
A relationship between two mature, independent people can therefore feel far deeper and more meaningful than one built on dependency or on anxious/avoidant strategies.
Even if it lasts only a few years, it can feel like a lifetime, while a relationship lasting decades can just feel empty.
As men, we're aware about how women chose, and then how they want to make that man "win".
It's like they form a team of two. Themselves vs the world.
For this reason women will be on first line for a specific kind of man, and do whatever he need in order to accomplish their goals.
So they will do sex, even when they don't want to, they will manipulate, just because these women "need" someone else to fullfil their needs, so they lean on men, when instead, they can, and should, satisfy their needs by themselves, and become responsible for their life.
Only at that point you can find a very good woman who is not manipulating you like a "desperate" non responsible woman would do,.
Curious about hearing from you.
ps: the basic need it's having a companion from the other sex understanding your position without having to manipulate or use tactics, so that both of you have your needs met, except for intimacy and true vulnerability.