Making the most out of my time

Plinco

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When you say... "achieving my values,"
What values exactly do you feel separate
from, and are striving or focused upon achieving? and then Why for each value, please.


I don't know what you mean by separate from. Do you mean values that I have not achieved yet? And I am also going to assume that you mean the values for my #1 goal, because I can write a short book on each item that I hold as a value. I mean, I value beef liver, but I'm pretty sure that is not what this topic is about.

Entertainment = increases serotonin and regulates dopamine.
The feeling of low anxiety = anxiety is a killer, it produces cortisol, adrenaline, and noradrenaline. Low anxiety turns all of that off.
The feelings of love = Love is the most selfish emotion; an affirmation of controlling reality.
Hormones, especially HGH = The hormone that keeps humans living; it is the anti-aging hormone that promotes reproductive health also.
learning, knowledge = discovery of what was not known before for the purpose of being better able to control reality.
opening increasing potential = potential decreases anxiety by lending the approximation of achieving or over achieving values/goals.

I have achieved all of these values partially, but not enough to where it is satisfactory.

When you say... "I care what people think to the extent of exchanging values with that person. Of course I want there to be a relationship there, provided that the person has something that I uphold as a value.
Please give examples of what values you experienced as exchanged and how.


This is a dumb question.

I walk into a market and if they do not sell beef liver, I'm walking out; I don't have a relationship with them. Or if the market does have beef liver to sell, I want to exchange my currency for the liver; I have a relationship with them.

If a couple of 30-something women invite me to a bar with them, I don't want to go because these older women don't have enough to offer me. Or 20 year old guys and girls want to play some game with me, I go because I value what they have to offer (the traits that I listed above).

Does this answer the question sufficiently?
 
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Plinco

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Do you subscribe to the belief that a goal must be effortful, difficult or painful to obtain, in order to be highly valued? If so, explain please. Would you still value it and welcome it, if you could simply have it and enjoy it? Would you resist that? why or why not?
A highly valued goal does not have to be difficult per say, but usually it is. I might highly value $2 bills, but it's not difficult to go to a bank and get one. Maybe I have no interest to climb Mount Everest, it's difficult, but I don't value it.

I don't see why I would resist having something that I could have with little effort. I would be somewhat bummed out if it were easy because the challenge makes it fun and builds the character;)
 

Plinco

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This is a dumb question.

I walk into a market and if they do not sell beef liver, I'm walking out; I don't have a relationship with them. Or if the market does have beef liver to sell, I want to exchange my currency for the liver; I have a relationship with them.

If a couple of 30-something women invite me to a bar with them, I don't want to go because these older women don't have enough to offer me. Or 20 year old guys and girls want to play some game with me, I go because I value what they have to offer (the traits that I listed above).

Does this answer the question sufficiently?
I'll add in that hanging out with the younger people is way more fun then the older people.
 

Plinco

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1.) my cognitive facilities
2.) physical needs, food, water, sleep, air.
3.) logic and reasoning
4.) Individualism
5.) Good functional health (strength, etc.)
6.) capitalism
7.) Work/career/money (currency) (skill sets in this area)
8.) Career #2, which involves my book and politics
9.) hard money (gold and silver)
10.) close relationships that I already have
 
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LiveYourDream

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I appreciate your replies. I'll share more tomorrow.
@Plinco I expected to have plenty of time and space, to offer you a thoughtful reply today. Instead, my day was the exact opposite. It has been non-stop and on the go. I do not want to write something at this late hour just for the sake of responding because I said I would. I feel exhausted right now. Even more than that, I also need/want to give much greater consideration, to what is actually truly present for me.

I apologize for not replying today, as I expected and as I said I would. Know that I did read what you shared last night. I need to re-read it and consider it further. It was a tricky one, for me. A good night's sleep and clarity must come first. That's my plan. Know I appreciate your patience and understanding in the meanwhile. ;)
 

Plinco

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@Plinco I expected to have plenty of time and space, to offer you a thoughtful reply today. Instead, my day was the exact opposite. It has been non-stop and on the go. I do not want to write something at this late hour just for the sake of responding because I said I would. I feel exhausted right now. Even more than that, I also need/want to give much greater consideration, to what is actually truly present for me.

I apologize for not replying today, as I expected and as I said I would. Know that I did read what you shared last night. I need to re-read it and consider it further. It was a tricky one, for me. A good night's sleep and clarity must come first. That's my plan. Know I appreciate your patience and understanding in the meanwhile. ;)
I appreciate your time and effort))
What do I owe you?)
 

LiveYourDream

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@Plinco I am not sure what to say at this point. Everyone leads their life, by their own decisions. It is not my place to say I know better than you, with regards to what you are choosing for yourself. Having the experiences yourself may be important and perhaps what you need, in order to be able to see things differently, grow, and move forward. I am not here to say what is right for you. As if you were a good friend, I will share, what is in my heart with you. That is concern.

What I experience with you is disharmony and incongruence. What does that mean?

When I say I experience disharmony with you, I get the sense that you are not comfortable in your own skin. Maybe you experience that as a low level anxiety that is always in the background or even foreground for you, or maybe not at all. To me. it feels like you feel ill at ease being you.

When I say I experience incongruence with you, I can read how you lay yourself out on paper with your goals and such and how it reads and how it sounds. My experience is that your true goal is actually different than your stated goal. To me I get the sense that you want it to read in a way that is more acceptable to you or maybe others. It seems, underneath it all, you are chasing something different and something that is not resolvable with the action plan you have laid out. I feel incongruence in that. To me I feel concern as I see the potential of spinning yourself in circles, for years, expecting resolution, only to never find it, with the strategy you have laid out for yourself.
That is a lot of potential time.

It is not for me to say what is right or not for your life experience.

I will share where I see incongruences or things that concern me.

I see you, as feeling like you were excluded from the college experience/s that you wished you would have had. I see you as feeling like without those experiences, you will always be/feel incomplete somehow. As if you are walking around with a big gapping hole in you, that everyone else filled in college, but you. Now, you feel, the only way to reconcile and fill it, to relieve that constant feeling of anxiety, is to go back in time, or the best imitation of that, in order to catch up, and have the experiences now, that you didn't have then. All that is with the hope to finally feel more whole or peace inside yourself. I think you have labelled that as finally feeling confident in yourself, because popular, high-valued, college kids accept/ed you and treat/ed you as one of them. That is what I see.

My concern again comes from the fact that I don't think the resolve you are seeking will come from that experience. You may need the experience, to learn that yourself.

From my perspective, you are looking to feel comfortable in your own skin. More than that you want to feel highly confident and even proud of who you are. You are not there right now. You have these lingering feelings, of not feeling accepted as one of the cool and popular kids. You feel less-than. As I see it, your "logic" tells you that if you are able to interact with popular high-value, college kids now and get them to like you, admire you, and accept you, that in some way you will finally feel healed, of your old hurts from before. That you believe you will "finally" have repaired the self-perceived "broken parts" of you and then be able to go forward into writing your book and selling your material and being in the world with full and true self-confidence.

My concern is that I think your "logic" is off. I think you want and expect it to work the way you perceive it and have designed it for yourself. There are aspects, to me, that are incongruent with that.

The first is that one's self acceptance is not gained by the receiving the acceptance of others. It is independent of that. It may make it easier. It is still independent. Believing strangers somehow hold the keys to your self acceptance and self confidence is also a huge error in thinking. That is where I previously spoke about the importance of choosing to take your power back, being a big key for you.

Another is the fact that you will be presenting yourself in an unauthentic way, seeking acceptance of that inauthentic presentation of you, and then expecting that to transfer over, and affect your own acceptance, of the authentic you. The authentic you will still be hidden behind the current facade you will presenting. In the end, I think you may actually feel more disconnected and isolated rather than more. You will have proven that the fake you can be accepted but that the real you still needs to hide. How meaningful is it to have a fake you be accepted and looked up to? What does it say about your authentic self, to feel the need to do that?

So, there is the authentic you that is 35 right now. You want to heal up and fix the 20 year old in you. Even supposing that were to work as you hope, there is still you right now that is disconnected and just as unaccepted, by you as well. I guess in some way, what I am adding in is that running to your past will not necessarily take care of the present. As I see it, your discomfort exists, as much in the present, as you perceive it does in the past.

I think you have set up goals to circumvent your attention away from facing that. As I see it, your discomfort and disharmony will still be there, until you are willing to face it fully, in the present.

I think that is all I have right now. I realize that aspects of this may resonate or not at all. I realize your inclination will most likely be to continue as you are. I am not at all attached. You determine what is right for you. I felt moved to share what I see, in the event it helps you, shorten your learning curve. That is all.

I wish you the best,
LYD
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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How do I make the most out of my limited time? Am I missing anything?
Just be a cool guy. I find it taxing when people try too hard.

IMHO you fall on this category. Even as a 30yr old man, i beat acquisition of top form SMV 18-23 more than anybody. The woman are at their peak. They will never be there again.

I get the idea, you want yo be the Wooderson. Creep on the younger crowds girls rather than just approaching and spitting game. Spot IOIs and choosing signals. Make your move. Chat up everyone. Guys are potentially wings, gym partners, and friends. Pull girls.


Nobody mentioned the elephant in the room. Women are one aspect. Young men have the fire and vigor though lacking competence (usually). Do not try to fit in. Just be that relic of masculinity that has since gone extinct. You will see that many males in the millennial age brackets are male feminist soy boys beta cucks.

Imade a bud. Young guy. In his mid 20s. A chick approached him and he ran away lulz i lost respect for him. The generation is a joke. He is a mess. Likely a virgin. I don't get it but the lack of testosterone is why young girls are ****ing up.
 

Plinco

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I went to a social last night at the university campus, and I remembered in detail how I felt:

Being there felt good. I felt like I was in the place that I was supposed to be. I felt comfortable; I did not feel like any part of it was forced. I did not feel like I had to impress anybody. Instead I felt and thought that the people I was talking to were of higher value than people I would normally talk to day to day. The whole social gathering was fun and entertaining. A day later, and my mood is still more uplifted than normal. No one except a few of the girls had a problem with me being there, again I look much younger than I am. The guys were worth more of my time to talk to and the girls were worth hitting on.

After reflecting on a previous statement you made, I think the issue is more that I expected a performance of communication rather than having to prove something to anyone else besides myself.

From my perspective, you are looking to feel comfortable in your own skin. More than that you want to feel highly confident and even proud of who you are. You are not there right now. You have these lingering feelings, of not feeling accepted as one of the cool and popular kids. You feel less-than. As I see it, your "logic" tells you that if you are able to interact with popular high-value, college kids now and get them to like you, admire you, and accept you, that in some way you will finally feel healed, of your old hurts from before. That you believe you will "finally" have repaired the self-perceived "broken parts" of you and then be able to go forward into writing your book and selling your material and being in the world with full and true self-confidence.

My concern is that I think your "logic" is off. I think you want and expect it to work the way you perceive it and have designed it for yourself. There are aspects, to me, that are incongruent with that.

The first is that one's self acceptance is not gained by the receiving the acceptance of others. It is independent of that. It may make it easier. It is still independent. Believing strangers somehow hold the keys to your self acceptance and self confidence is also a huge error in thinking. That is where I previously spoke about the importance of choosing to take your power back, being a big key for you.
It's more like being able to interact and being able to dominate when necessary. I think you are close in your analysis.

Another is the fact that you will be presenting yourself in an unauthentic way, seeking acceptance of that inauthentic presentation of you, and then expecting that to transfer over, and affect your own acceptance, of the authentic you. The authentic you will still be hidden behind the current facade you will presenting. In the end, I think you may actually feel more disconnected and isolated rather than more. You will have proven that the fake you can be accepted but that the real you still needs to hide. How meaningful is it to have a fake you be accepted and looked up to? What does it say about your authentic self, to feel the need to do that?

So, there is the authentic you that is 35 right now. You want to heal up and fix the 20 year old in you. Even supposing that were to work as you hope, there is still you right now that is disconnected and just as unaccepted, by you as well. I guess in some way, what I am adding in is that running to your past will not necessarily take care of the present. As I see it, your discomfort exists, as much in the present, as you perceive it does in the past.
Then why do I feel more authentic while I was at that social last night?

I think you have set up goals to circumvent your attention away from facing that. As I see it, your discomfort and disharmony will still be there, until you are willing to face it fully, in the present.
I think and feel that I am facing exactly where I need to face. My discomfort and disharmony lies in the fact that I cannot do this everyday, nor have I done this sooner.

I think that is all I have right now. I realize that aspects of this may resonate or not at all. I realize your inclination will most likely be to continue as you are. I am not at all attached. You determine what is right for you. I felt moved to share what I see, in the event it helps you, shorten your learning curve. That is all.

I wish you the best,
LYD
And I fully appreciate it. Thank you!
 
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Plinco

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Update:

So I started hanging out with a Christian group at the university campus (even though I am not Christian) and playing volleyball once a week. I also asked out four girls (all 18) on dates that I know in my local area; they all said "no"

I am feeling a bit happier but I think my next target is to really pump up my hormones in the gym and at home with better sleep and eating habits. Hopefully I can get to where I want to go by the fall semester.
 

Spaz

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Update:

So I started hanging out with a Christian group at the university campus (even though I am not Christian) and playing volleyball once a week. I also asked out four girls (all 18) on dates that I know in my local area; they all said "no"

I am feeling a bit happier but I think my next target is to really pump up my hormones in the gym and at home with better sleep and eating habits. Hopefully I can get to where I want to go by the fall semester.
Too much mothering that's why ur mindset is warped.

The feminine mindset is always one that seeks others to feel part of the herd, that's you wanting to be with 18 year olds thereby putting urself in the herd, always in competition mode, always molding, never leading.

The masculine mindset is one that always lures the herd his way, picking off those young ones that amuses him the most, he is after all 1st and foremost a predator.

Increase ur sphere of influence to lead the herd ur way and stop wasting time being under influence of the herd.

How?

Be a guest speaker at the college by offering ur experience and expertise as a marketing man.

If u make an impression there, you will get more invites and you will be influential.

All these will earn you admiration from a whole section of people, from students to their teachers.

Now u r leading the herd.

Now u r somebody.

Now u r important.

Now people listen to you.

Now you have increased ur sphere of influence.

Just don't do some illegal shiet like forcing urself on impressionable girls that you bring home.
 

Plinco

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Too much mothering that's why ur mindset is warped.

The feminine mindset is always one that seeks others to feel part of the herd, that's you wanting to be with 18 year olds thereby putting urself in the herd, always in competition mode, always molding, never leading.

The masculine mindset is one that always lures the herd his way, picking off those young ones that amuses him the most, he is after all 1st and foremost a predator.

Increase ur sphere of influence to lead the herd ur way and stop wasting time being under influence of the herd.

How?

Be a guest speaker at the college by offering ur experience and expertise as a marketing man.

If u make an impression there, you will get more invites and you will be influential.

All these will earn you admiration from a whole section of people, from students to their teachers.

Now u r leading the herd.

Now u r somebody.

Now u r important.

Now people listen to you.

Now you have increased ur sphere of influence.

Just don't do some illegal shiet like forcing urself on impressionable girls that you bring home.
I appreciate the response but it's more about the freedom than being a part of something. It's about putting myself where I want to be.

Being in a "authority" position is not the way I want to market myself right now. I just want to have fun and have no hindrances.
 

MatureDJ

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If you're going to be an orbiter, be an orbiter around Cynthia, even if she has a "Moonface". :cool:

2936
 
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Plinco

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DEEZEDBRAH

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Just interact with more people. Aim at your targeted demographic. Be warned, the current generation sucks. Yes, younger is hotter. I have some younger friends but that group of men walk on egg shells. I have seen guys run away after a girl approaches. Its pathetic.
 

Plinco

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Just interact with more people. Aim at your targeted demographic. Be warned, the current generation sucks. Yes, younger is hotter. I have some younger friends but that group of men walk on egg shells. I have seen guys run away after a girl approaches. Its pathetic.
I've noticed. Some girls are way more narcissistic and delusional than they were 15 years ago. A lot of the guys just sit quietly and do nothing in social gatherings. It's like shooting fish in a barrel
 

DEEZEDBRAH

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I've noticed. Some girls are way more narcissistic and delusional than they were 15 years ago. A lot of the guys just sit quietly and do nothing in social gatherings. It's like shooting fish in a barrel
A by product of a culture that cheers women off the cliff with girl power and her **** don't stink when it does.

Little do they know, hotter girls are turning 18 19 20 21 every day.
 

Julian

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LOL brah you are absolutely MENTAL fam

just skipped thru the thread and lol...hard to believe this is real
 
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