Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

Read more...

Let's hope you are never this hard up

MatureDJ

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 30, 2006
Messages
12,750
Reaction score
5,164
http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,343031,00.html

Man Faces Charges for Having Sex With Picnic Table

Ohio police have arrested a man who was caught on tape allegedly having sex with a picnic table.

Art Price Jr., 40, of Bellevue, Ohio, was arrested after a neighbor videotaped him engaged sexually with the metal table, according to a report on FOX19.com.

Price was seen on four separate occasions, always between 10:30 a.m. and noon, having sex with the picnic table, Bellevue Police Capt. Matt Johnson told the TV station.

"The first video we had, he was completely nude," Johnson said, noting the table in question had a hole in the middle intended to hold an umbrella.

Price, a married father of three school-age kids, faces felony counts of public indecency because his house is near an elementary school, according to the report.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

KontrollerX

Master Don Juan
Joined
Oct 11, 2005
Messages
4,476
Reaction score
182
What was he supposed to do?

It was wearing its skimpiest table cloth!
 

ThunderMaverick

Master Don Juan
Joined
Mar 19, 2004
Messages
1,945
Reaction score
70
Age
45
He's married. That explains it.



I remember a story miy sister told me growing up. She said she knew this guy who would put two raw steaks between the mattress and the box spring of his bed and f**k it sideways. s

That story still makes me laugh to this day. Some bony dude (probably bald) bare naked hitting his bed from the side.


Hahahaha naaasty!
 

Mr. Me

Master Don Juan
Joined
Dec 19, 2007
Messages
1,356
Reaction score
84
His Top Ten defenses are:

10. "It was just a f#cking picnic. I mean that literally".

9. "I was whipping up a batch of my special 'no mayo potato salad' sauce, a family favorite!".

8. "I'm trying to scare the ants away. And it was working, too."

7. "Where's the crime if the table consents?"

6. "I'm the pervert? Why don't you arrest those voyeuristic, video-taping neighbors of mine?"

5. "This is Bellevue, Ohio. What else is there here to do for kicks?"

4. "Give me a break. This is the first time I've ever f#cked anything that didn't give me a hard time back."

3. "You think this is something? You oughtta see my weenie roast."

2. "But the table's all I have left! I pimped my lawn chair out to Elliot Spitzer for $4000."

and his number one top defense:

1. "That's the picnic table? Oh sh1t! I thought it was my wife. They're both that hard, flat and cold."
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

ketostix

Banned
Joined
Feb 10, 2005
Messages
3,871
Reaction score
55
This is a weird story, but it's the implications that bothers me. I assume he was in his own back yard. What the hell is this neighbor doing videotaping him? They were probably thinking I caught the predophile predator now hahaha. As weird as it was, he was in his own backyard doing his thing, and because he lives "near" an elementary school he can be charged with felony public indecency? You got to love the justice sytem. I didn't even know public indecency could rise to a felony. I betcha if a woman went out in her yard some sunny day and went to town with a cucumber or a dildo she wouldn't be charged with anything let alone a felony. It just seems like the mentality of the criminalization of male sexuality. I'm not even saying there shouldn't be a double standard with men and women exposing themself, but not as extreme as this. It has broader implications.
 

ketostix

Banned
Joined
Feb 10, 2005
Messages
3,871
Reaction score
55
Bible_Belt said:
Having Sex With Picnic Table

His wife has got to feel sexy.

Lol that might be the problem right there.
 

decades

Master Don Juan
Joined
Aug 3, 2004
Messages
1,223
Reaction score
35
Location
sf ca
yeah but the picnic table was a 9.5.
 

ketostix

Banned
Joined
Feb 10, 2005
Messages
3,871
Reaction score
55
persistent exaction said:
yeah but the picnic table was a 9.5.

Yeah that's pretty bad when your wife rates lower than a picnic table on a scale that includes inanimate objects. Just imagine how low she rate in a scale that only included women lol.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

Top