"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Just a few funny quotes you could use while flirting

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biglou323

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I was searching google, came across a webside with funny IM names...

PIcked these out

I'm not smiling at you, I'm trying not to laugh!

We both know I'm the best, that's why you never tell me

I aint guilty, im just not innocent

You may laugh because I'm different but I laugh because you're all the same

You and the bank own a very lovely home

Don't be open-minded, your brains might fall out

Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids

Even hot girls have to fart

A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings

I don't know if I'm a player. Ask one of my girlfriends

Everyone likes a little ass, but no one likes a smart ass

Oh man this is crazy, I hope I didn't brain my damage

Did you get your good looks from your father. He a plastic surgeon?

I never appoligize! I'm sorry, that's just not the way I am

I don't like to repeat things, so listen carefully the first six times

I like my coffee like I like my women. In a plastic cup

Noticed they could be used with ****y funny in real life convosations, if used wisely... I know they sound cheesy but I think they could get a few laughs.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Nighthawk

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They mostly sound like something David Brent would say except for that last one, which I find hilarious.
 
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sexy_kuta

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lmao

nice find
 
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S1NN3R

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Nighthawk said:
They mostly sound like something David Brent would say except for that last one, which I find hilarious.
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That would be very Eddie Izzardish.

"I like my women like I like my coffee. Hot. And dark. With a spoon in them..."
 
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shiningshadow

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These are funny, thanks.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Charm

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This one is not smooth, but is hilarious
A man that has never lied to a woman has no respect for her feelings
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Skilla_Staz

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biglou323 said:
Kids in back seats cause accidents, accidents in back seats cause kids

I don't know if I'm a player. Ask one of my girlfriends

Everyone likes a little ass, but no one likes a smart ass

I never appoligize! I'm sorry, that's just not the way I am
[/U]
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I like those. The kids thing = funny. The player sounds like something I'd say. The little ass? I don't like little asses. I'm a smart ass though. I DON'T Apologize, but this one puts a funny twist (sort of) on it.:)
 
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