"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Jophil. Must read especially for Master DJ's.

speed dawg

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Lost a good one. Jophil was one of the best.

Money cannot buy what I have learned from this site and guys like Jophil. Very sad day indeed.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

ThunderMaverick

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........

I've never wrote anything like this for anyone, but I feel like I lost a mentor and a comrade, even though I didn't agree with some of the things he said.

To not say anything about his sickness speaks volumes about his constitution. He never wanted us to see him complain or make excuses. What a guy :(

I will miss you, Jo. I hope you are at peace wherever you are.
 

women haze

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One of the best Posters on this site, his topics and Postings was def an eye opener for me...

Out of respect for what he posted maybe we should add Jop's words to the DJ bible ...I am sure new members would benefit from some of the stuff he posted...

RIP man
 

DMSR76

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I really regret hearing this. Jophil was a man that you could always rely on to say something "spot-on" in a thread. He always weighed-in on topics with great balance. His insight and wisdom will be missed.

It's a blessing that he doesn't have to suffer anymore.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

Read more...

WhitePimp

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Always had great advice, and seemed like a genuinely good guy.

Hope he's pulling ass somewhere peaceful and beautiful...

RIP
 

john siegal

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RIP Jophil...!

...even though we had words and didn't always see eye to eye...i thank for your comments.

See you on the other side Friend!
 

Fuglydude

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RIP.

Never thought he was that ill. Tough guy for never complaining about it even though it was warranted. I never knew him well, but valued his insights and wisdom... He was a great contributor to the forum and he will be missed by all.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

Zunder

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I had an argument on here once with Jophill...when I was newish to this forum. I really was a tool at the time, but he never lost his cool. As time went on I got to really like the bloke and what he had to say.
In fact - I made a beeline for his most recent posts everytime I logged on.
I cant quite believe the fella is gone. I will miss his posts immensley.
Rest in peace mate.
 

Jeffst1980

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Jophil was truly a poster that embodied the kind of man we all want to emulate: an inspirational leader, a direct yet respectful communicator, and a wise teacher. Truly sad news- he will be greatly missed.
 

Scaramouche

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Dear 5String,
It is winter here,last night a gale blew our Radar Tower down at work,what a miserable night....then this morning your terrible news....I was feeling so sorry for myself with a crook back,a Cold and the prospect of Snow tonight....In some strange way this News makes me appreciate what I often take for granted....Makes you realise that all around us there are colleagues and mates,heroes in their way,making a brave face of pretty dreadful situations....We shall miss him greatly,with all his problems he still found time to mentor young guys on here,to give advice to Lone Fathers and to his Dance group...May he this moment,be whirling around tripping the light fantastic toe in Paradises Ballroom in the Sky.
 

TheTraveller

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Amen Scaramouche, Amen.

RIP Jophil. Your wisdom and true fit in the sosuave community was appreciated by us all.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

Read more...

HoneyHitter

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Nothing but respect for Jophil. Thanks for your valuable contributions and guidance. RIP Jophil.
 

Wilko

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Damn, now that puts a few things in their proper perspective.

This guy stoically and unflinchingly faces down cancer and ultimately his own death, and I'm actually worrying about flakes and rejection?!

Well sh!t, I think I'd be dishonouring his memory by continuing to b!tch out like that. It stops.
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

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