She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.
You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.
She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.
The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.
Good stuff. And make the most of the remaining time...sounds great.Originally posted by SexPDX:
As an update to Jake and others interested, my plan for the girl I #closed in Pioneer Square is coming into focus. I think I am going to take her out for ice cream and then to this movie theater that plays these artsy
fartsy against the grain kind of stuff. Since this girl struck both Jake and myself as a wannabe rebel type chick I may even smoke some bomb with her.
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
I still think that was going on. It is pretty obvious the battery excuse was BS, but I think that she was testing to see if she accomplished her agenda in getting AFC's goat to see if she had to actually go through with fvcking you in order to do it. We were chilling on my dad's porch last night for about 20 minutes after you called her on the way back from Shannahan's and no call. I don't think this was a matter of ASD, I think if she called back it would have been because she wanted to fvck. I don't think this was an unwinnable situation, it was just a matter of pushing the envelope when you oringinally closed.Originally posted by Jake Steed:
Finally, she says her cell battery is almost dead and she has to go but will call me back in 10 minutes when she gets home. Whatever. No call back of course. PDX's theory was that she was at that time rubbing our "date" in her bf's face and using me to make him jealous. This theory is entirely possible.
When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.
Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.
Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.
The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.
I sincerely appreciate the compliment and would like to point out there is a reason for what you observe. We need more blow-by-blow field reports of pick up attempts and seductions whether they involve other DJ's or not.Originally posted by MR_PERFECT:
This is one of the best threads I've ever read.
e-mail me: [email protected]Originally posted by Don_juan:
Hey SexPDX, my mom and sister live in Portland. I'm there all the time. What bars did you hit? My sister owns a clothing store in downtown Portland on 3rd ave, it's pretty cool. I'll have to get with you before I go there sometime. I've been to a few okay bars there... like some place by my sisters store called bar 51 or something like that, and there is a bar across the street that was cool. What are the cool bars there? I've been to a few others but I can't remember there names....
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.