"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Is interest important?

MackJr

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I'm not talking about sexual interest, that's why this thread is in Anything Else. It's more of a success thread.

I'm talking about general interest. For example, why you learn to use a computer or why you learn about cars or some hobby. We do hobbies because they're interesting to us.


However, at work, the stuff one does isn't that interesting. If your job is to deliver mail, you only have to drive a route so many times before it gets boring and all the mail is the same. If your job is to program computers, after a while you'll see that C++, Java, and C# are just variations on a theme. It seems that everything gets like this.

You could even get bored of DJing if you tried to master it and hit a plateau.

So... is interest even a relevant matter to consider when doing something? If I were fully logical then I'd just take up the field that pays the absolute most money and be a lawyer or Wall Street person. It's just that all that minutiae is so bland. To what degree should emotional involvement play a role in decisions about these sort of things?
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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Phoenix_of_the_ashes

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Well you do want to do something that you like right? Or is it unimportant for you what you do as long as you get good money for it?
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Two jobs paying the same with the same hours and relatively the same distance from home, which do you pick? Would interest matter?
 

MackJr

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if the jobs were the same, interest would matter. But say that you want to take what you're doing to the next level, but the price is higher amounts of drudgery.
 

diplomatic_lie

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So let me get this straight:

1) You have a hobby/interest/job
2) You want to get to the next level of success
3) But in order to do that, it is boring


If my assumption is right, then you just need to figure out whether the results of "the next level" will be worth the boredom.

Sometimes you need to experience a bit of boredom in order to recieve the rewards.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Bonhomme

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Importnt, but depends upon your options

Of course interest is important, but some people just don't have any choice in some matters.

Ya gotta do what ya gotta do. If you can make a career of something intersting and fun, all the better for you.
 
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