lizardking82
Master Don Juan
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What I mean is...when you openly flirt with a woman...is that a sign to her that you want her more than she wants you otherwise she'd be flirting first?
"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"
You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.
For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.
Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.
The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.
Is flirting with a woman first a lower value signal?
- Thread starter lizardking82
- Start date
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
corrector
Master Don Juan
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Flirting doesn't mean anything though. You are just taking a mild social risk by engaging in some sort of non-business interaction with a woman with the hopes of eliciting a positive response from her to make both her day and your day nicer than if you did nothing otherwise (i.e. usually with not a worst outcome unless the woman has a problem herself). I don't see how that is even wanting someone beyond just having a nice time with someone at the moment. Just engage in small talk and step it up if she's contributing fairly to the interaction.
I understand your viewpoint as I've played the cool, uninterested role before. And it has worked in my favor quite a few times. Honestly it depends on the situation. At times I'm able to dominate the flirty conversation when I see her getting nervous or flirtatious back. But there have been times when they have responded in a condescending manner to which I chalk up as a "you can't get them all" mindset and move on.
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
MillionBillionaire
Master Don Juan
Flirting should never look try hard by one person but the essence of flirting is you are BOTH flirting, you are BOTH trying hard.
Otherwise It's just a one way clown show.
I swear ya'll look too much into PUA theory
Otherwise It's just a one way clown show.
I swear ya'll look too much into PUA theory
EyeBRollin
Master Don Juan
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Yes. Flirting is what women do to get a mans attention. Flirting is feminine. Your job as a man is to pick up on her interest and make something happen. Men are direct.
RangerMIke
Master Don Juan
You approach, if she flirts you flirt back. That's the dance and what is expected, but you should do something about it if you are interested in her. If you stand around flirting for more than 15 minutes she'll assume you are not really interested and her interest will drop.
Skyline
Master Don Juan
Flirting is just a social interaction. Even friends flirt with each other. Flirting is just a sign that you are normal and not socially dumb.