"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

Interest vs. Attraction

Vikman

Don Juan
Joined
May 25, 2007
Messages
66
Reaction score
0
I'm interested in a new woman. I have casual conversations with her daily on the job, but she has not asked me any questions about my personal life.

Here's my question: if a woman doesn't ask you questions about your life, does that mean she is not attracted to you?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

kratosnofear

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 10, 2007
Messages
18
Reaction score
1
Who knows?! She's probably not that into you or just a horrible conversationalist. Are there any other signs? Are you making her laugh and being fun?
 

szof

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 22, 2002
Messages
103
Reaction score
1
Location
between two stems
When women disproportionately either: talk about themselves or ask you about you - they are not interested. An attracted woman participates in a give and take - a conversation that flows naturally when she is talking to a man she is interested in and to whom she wants to demonstrate her value.
 

speakeasy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 4, 2006
Messages
2,776
Reaction score
77
szof said:
When women disproportionately either: talk about themselves or ask you about you - they are not interested. An attracted woman participates in a give and take - a conversation that flows naturally when she is talking to a man she is interested in and to whom she wants to demonstrate her value.
Gotta disagree with you there. I think if a woman is asking a lot about you, that is a definite sign of interest. Unless they are interviewing your for a job or trying to figure out whether to fix you up with one of their friends, a woman is generally not going to ask you a barrage of questions, especially of a personal or emotional nature if she's not interested.
 

szof

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 22, 2002
Messages
103
Reaction score
1
Location
between two stems
speakeasy said:
Gotta disagree with you there. I think if a woman is asking a lot about you, that is a definite sign of interest. Unless they are interviewing your for a job or trying to figure out whether to fix you up with one of their friends, a woman is generally not going to ask you a barrage of questions, especially of a personal or emotional nature if she's not interested.
I forget who it was who said, a stranger to a man is someone he doesn't know whereas a stanger to a woman is someone who doesn't know of her. Anyways, if a woman is interviewing you, she may just be trying to toy with you or gauge your value - it is not a sufficient indicator of her interest in you. If she never escapes interrogation mode, she is not interested or, at best, doesn't care to demonstrate her own value.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Stage

New Member
Joined
Jun 29, 2007
Messages
4
Reaction score
0
I agree with szof. From my experience I have noticed that women generally ask a question in retort to one of yours as an indicator of interest. For example if you ask them something about themselves, they'll return the question by making it a little bit more personal. I have found that this is a really good indicator of interest. A woman's interest lies within how personal the information she is trying to get out of you is.
 

BadAssMoFo

Don Juan
Joined
Oct 27, 2006
Messages
55
Reaction score
0
That's rationality talking.

Just because a woman doesn't ask you questions about you doesn't mean anything.

She could be totally shy, insecure, or whatever..but that doesn't bar attraction.
 

speakeasy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 4, 2006
Messages
2,776
Reaction score
77
By definition, anyone that's continuing to talk to you when they don't have to is interested in you on some level or they'd find a polite excuse to exit the conversation. Interest is the gateway to attraction.
 

Jestor

Don Juan
Joined
Nov 5, 2005
Messages
77
Reaction score
0
Vikman said:
I'm interested in a new woman. I have casual conversations with her daily on the job, but she has not asked me any questions about my personal life.

Here's my question: if a woman doesn't ask you questions about your life, does that mean she is not attracted to you?
Depends, usually there's a feeling out process.
 

xectxny19x

Don Juan
Joined
Jul 30, 2005
Messages
128
Reaction score
0
I'd have to agree with szof. Great points, man. :rockon:

Anyway, why spend time gauging a girl's interest in you? Just a make move and find out for sure. :trouble:
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

Read more...

IPreyOnIt

Don Juan
Joined
Jun 28, 2007
Messages
31
Reaction score
0
I don't think thats what it means. She might just be shy with it, or maybe just shy with it around you. Do you act like a real jackass when people ask you personal questions? LOL? And has she witnessed this?
 

Poonani Maker

Master Don Juan
Joined
Apr 29, 2007
Messages
4,392
Reaction score
927
If a woman tells you that "this is her last day (at work)" and that "(I) won't get to see (her) again" until September (she's just a temp and she's going back home to live with her parents for the summer), does this mean she's interested in me? She's always flirting with me. I told her that she reminds me of a girl that I used to know in grade school (of the same last name). Every time she saw me she'd say, "Are you happy your favorite person is here?...I am." She says this almost every single time we encounter in business. She's also about 20 or 10 years younger than me. I think she thinks I'm younger than I am (I take good care of myself and I'm hot and cool).
 
Top