"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Inferiority

Gripped

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DanZy said:
Dude you're going to look back in a year's time and think to yourself "Wow, I really was a pvssy back then". You can analyse this as much as you like but in the end, everything comes down to you taking action. There's zero need to analyse this as much as you have, it won't help. You've recognised and admitted the problem, now get down to some hard graft and overcome it. It's not easy, it won't be quick but you'll be damn better for it.
But what does this graft entail? You see I analyse for two reasons; to pinpoint my specific problems and because I find it fascinating. If I am given the advice of "manning up" or to simply "go to the gym" it is too general. I don't feel it is helpful, I could work those out with ease myself. I do see your point in that over analyzing specific situations does detract from social confidence in the moment of occurrence. However I feel personal reflection of ones emotional and mental activity is not harmful as identifying damaging thought processes will help to eradicate them and hence promote growth. This is essentially me attempting to deal with what exactly stops me from "manning up".
 

"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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NorwegianDJ

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Gripped said:
But what does this graft entail? You see I analyse for two reasons; to pinpoint my specific problems and because I find it fascinating. If I am given the advice of "manning up" or to simply "go to the gym" it is too general. I don't feel it is helpful, I could work those out with ease myself. I do see your point in that over analyzing specific situations does detract from social confidence in the moment of occurrence. However I feel personal reflection of ones emotional and mental activity is not harmful as identifying damaging thought processes will help to eradicate them and hence promote growth. This is essentially me attempting to deal with what exactly stops me from "manning up".
You lack leverage. You'll find it elsewhere, not in your analysis.

This analysing is not preventing you from taking action; you simply choose not to take action.

It's all on you. Always has been; always will be.
 

Gripped

Don Juan
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Gripped

Don Juan
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Certainly not my insight but my words.

Snippet of wisdom:

There are those who deal in problems and those who deal in solutions.
The man who is solution focused ambles around looking for magic beans.
The man who is problem focused sees what blocks him from greatness and obliterates it.
 
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