"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
I'm 23 and she's 17
- Thread starter marketboy
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
AndoraStar
Don Juan
If you love her as you say you do, give her the space and freedom to still be a teenager.
Remember age is just a number.. all the best
CyranoDeBergerac
Master Don Juan
She is in the state of Nevada! Trip to Vegas anyone???
Other than that I have good news and bad.
yes, you are an idiot.
On the other hand you're more in the vein of profound insecurity and one-itis than outright b@$$tard.
-Cyrano
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
djcaseanova
New Member
BUT moreover back to the topic at hand... My girlfriend is 18, almost 19 and I am 23. Her parents love me... and I know she loves me. Are you an fool... depends... you are if you don't know the meaning between love and lust. If you lust over her, then yes, if you love her, then no. Love has now age limits nor boundaries... lust is dangerous, pray you don't knock her up =)
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
E-Z Rider
Master Don Juan
6 yrs, in itself, isn't a big deal.
In fact, the ages aren't the biggest deal at all. Her youthfulness presents a slightly different aspect of womankind, but for the most part just treat her like you would any woman, regardless of age. The guidelines of this site don't need to be altered much at all for this.
Where you have me scared is with the 'I'm in love with her' part. Now, there's nothing wrong with being in love, or even getting hurt by a woman. All the macho keyboard jockeys are just fooling themselves if they think they can go through life without vesting enough emotion in a girl to get hurt- and still live a fulfilling life.
What I'm talking about is the effect young girls can have. They can seem so good, so un-tainted, so energetic. And they can seem like they love you a hell of a lot- but really they don't know what it is they're dealing with. They are usually nieve and are easily swayed by men...meaning you might probably have issues with one of her 'guy friends' sooner or later. And then there's the whole maturing process she has yet to go through.
My point being, it's hard to really love someone who hasn't even defined themself yet. It's not impossible for you to be in love (and if you really are, I hope it works out), but it's unlikely. Without a doubt, you're attracted to her, but love is a very strong word to toss around.
Anyways, I say go for it. Go balls out, don't ever turn down an opportunity with a good women without a good reason. And a low probability of relationship success does not constitute a 'good reason'; the success of ANY relationship has a low success rate- it's a given. And on that note, of all those problems I and others have listed abt 17 yr old girls, if you really look the same problems (or slight variations thereof) plague older women as well. It's a mixed bag- IMO your odds aren't either hurt or helped by her being 17.
So go for it. Balls out. Don't be afraid to get hurt- if you don't get hurt by her it'll be someone else. And as always, I recommend to fulfill your life in other ways as much as possible. It makes everything better, and will ease any hurt that can come of this.
Good luck, and I hoped this helped- E-Z
"She's Out of Your League"
You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.
Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.
She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.
Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.
Toronto's Finest
Don Juan
Thanks 00Kenny,
I've actual mentioned your suggestion about asking a girl how she'd feel if she only ever dated one man (I told them 'date', not 'slept'), and the response has been mixed so far. I have a few inexperienced female friends I keep in touch with, and half say they would wonder what it would be like to be with another man if they married their first love, but aren't sure how they'd react since they've never been in a longterm relationship
....and then I know some who said they wouldn't worry about it as long as they're happy with their partner.