"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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ignoring "her"

trd323

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Well i have been talking to this girl in my class(college), and yesterday I felt like crap and had a really bad day. Well i usually walk her home but yesterday i did not feel like it so I just left without waiting for her, and i started talking on the phone. Did i mess things up? I messaged her that i had a bad day and i did not want to take it out on anyone, and she messaged back that i looked upset and that she was not able to say hi to me.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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milkman

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Originally posted by trd323
Well i have been talking to this girl in my class(college), and yesterday I felt like crap and had a really bad day. Well i usually walk her home but yesterday i did not feel like it so I just left without waiting for her, and i started talking on the phone. Did i mess things up? I messaged her that i had a bad day and i did not want to take it out on anyone, and she messaged back that i looked upset and that she was not able to say hi to me.
No problem, everything is good. ;)

BTW, girls like emotional stuff and being in a bad mood from time to time is only natural. It let you appear like a human being instead of an always-laughing-always-in-supergood-mood-totally-fake-robot.
 

biker_gixxer

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Did i mess things up? ]

If anything, you intrigued her. You got her thinking about you and wondering what happened. Keep this type of thing going... Be mysterious...

I wouldn't have texted her talking about your 'bad day'. Girls don't like it when guys play the 'victim', it's not a very masculine trait.

I would have waited until the next day when you saw her again. I'm sure the first question out of her mouth would have been 'what happened?'...
 

trd323

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oh ok. Yeah I was thinking about not messaging her, i guess I still have traces of AFC in me. But I am trying hard to get it out of me.
 

squirrels

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Originally posted by trd323
Did i mess things up?
Only if you worry about having messed things up. You dont' need to apologize to her if you had a sh!tty day. Just tell her you'll catch her later/tomorrow when you feel better.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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biker_gixxer

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Originally posted by trd323
oh ok. Yeah I was thinking about not messaging her, i guess I still have traces of AFC in me. But I am trying hard to get it out of me.
It's a learning process bro, don't sweat it...
We all have a certain amount of AFC in us. Some of us have gallons of it, enough to fill an oil tanker, lol. Others have a few drops...
 

Wiesman44

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Trd, may I ask you why you bothered to post this ? How are we supposed to know if you messed anything up.

It looks like you had a bad day and she realized that, so what is your point here ? We don't live your life.
 

trd323

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well i was wondering if completely ignoring her in class when we would talk during class, and i would walk her home after class. So, i wanted to know if completely ignoring her messed things up
 

steroidsrule

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calm down wies...the guy questioned one of his decisions and wanted to know if it was a good or bad move...we all have times when we question our decisions and we did what this board was designed to do...help out each other
 

Freeman

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Originally posted by trd323
Well i have been talking to this girl in my class(college), and yesterday I felt like crap and had a really bad day. Well i usually walk her home but yesterday i did not feel like it so I just left without waiting for her, and i started talking on the phone. Did i mess things up? I messaged her that i had a bad day and i did not want to take it out on anyone, and she messaged back that i looked upset and that she was not able to say hi to me.
No you didnt screw up-Im sure she understands man...
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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