"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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I think I mess up, fart

J

jlee

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So I was making out hot and heavy with this girl. She was on top of me, getting ready to take her shirt off. I let loose a rip, and she heard it. She said " you did not just do that." I just smiled, try to pull her close to me and continue kissing. But she said its too hot, got off me. She went into the bathroom clean up. Went back out into living room and grab her stuff and said she had to go. I was like wow... I really mess up this time...

I'm not sure what to do now...
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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WaterTiger

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:nono: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :crackup: :nono:

Oh DAAAAMN that was funny!
 
J

J-Bone

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haha wow man! i'd have to say the hell with her and good ridance. she is too uptight and prissy. i've dated a bunch of girls who just laugh that or i'd have them so turned on they would ignore it because they wouldn't dare do anything that might possibly make me stop
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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WaterTiger

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I don't know if you can recover from this. Some people take flatulence as a HUGE social no-no. It's a natural body function like burping. I'd have laughed it off and teased you about it. Sounds like this girl has NO sense of humor, you probably didn't want her anyway.

Life ain't perfect...farts happen!
 
J

jlee

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I'm lactose intolerant and that morning I was eating cereal. I know I shouldn't be eating cereal and drinking milk but I did anyways. I sent her an sms explaining why I let out gas and that I was embarrass about it.

Man talk about messing up...
 
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SaucyBoy

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You messed up but so did she. She is ready to fvck you but she can't stand to hear a fart? It's different if she was down there and it went right into her face.

Now you know that you should stick to food you can handle man.
 
S

superchristx

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That's ridiculous, I don't care how hot she is everybody farts. How long are you supposed to hold in your farts? What if you married her? That would be forty years of squeezing your ******* closed.
 

“The 22 Psychological Triggers That Make Women Chase You… Starting Tonight”

Forget the cash, the cars, and the chiseled jawlines. Female desire operates on a completely different frequency. Primal. Subconscious. Triggers that bypass her logic and hit her on a gut level. Most guys are totally blind to them.

I know because I was one of them. The overthinking. The paralysis. The silent drive home kicking yourself for freezing up. Watching average guys walk away with the girl while you stood there stuck in your own head.

Then I decoded the psychology behind what actually makes women tick. 22 hard rules.  Subtle behavioral shifts that rewired my entire reality. The anxiety evaporated. Women started leaning in. Investing. Chasing.

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I

I.A.F.Y.B.

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Oh well, theres always more fishes to sleep with. Just let that be a lesson to you for next time :crackup: I'm susprised she got so offended hasn't she ever farted or queefed before?
 
J

jlee

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No it wasn't a wet one. It was a small fart, didn't even smell. That's all.
 
T

Teflon_Mcgee

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I don't know, if some girl did that to me I'd be pretty turned off.

There's a time and a place, and that's not it. She overreacted, but you definatley killed the mood.

When the moods gone, the moods gone.
 
B

Bvbidd

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Take a look at it from her point of view.

It would be a lot harder for her to respect herself if she went any further with you. Girls really don't like being thought of as slvts.
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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guru1000

guru1000

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Consider this a means to an end. She did you a favor, by saving you grief down the road. She's not flexible, lose her!
 
D

Dongfu

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Leave another fart on her voicemail :crackup:
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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