Why "Whatever You Want" Keeps You Single

She says the movie looks dumb; you suddenly agree. She tests you with a little attitude; you apologize for nothing.

You think you're being easy to get along with. She reads something else entirely: a man with no edges. Nothing to hold on to. No friction, no tension, no reason to wonder what he really thinks.

The "22 Rules" taught me to push back — playfully, calmly, without needing her approval. Strange things happened after that.

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I think found what I want in a girl + comfort building tips

daygameguy

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I just came back after an ice-cream date with a girl. She is an HB 8 overall and a freshman college student. Unlike other usual college girls, she is amazingly down to earth, smart, funny, playful, and real pretty at the same time.

I am surprised I found a girl like that. Anyway, no one-itis, but I have found the type of girl I would like to have as a long term partner, and good for me, there are a lot of girls of each definable type in this world. So I am not desperate to run after her.

Anyway, here are some comfort building tips from my dating experiences so far:

When you are on a date/in a comfort building situation, always:

1. Try to focus on making the date as enjoyable, fun and playful as possible. The more she feels that "this was a great date!", the more likely she is to see you again. DO NOT FOCUS ON GETTING SOMETHING (sex or whatever)

2. Try to not be needy. You have to be your true self, you can or actually HAVE to show your interest in the girl, and you also have to Kino a lot, BUT DO NOT BE NEEDY.. or AFC BY SAYING STUFF THAT SOUNDS SUPPLICATING/WUSSY LIKE.

3. If possible, find common interests, so that you can build up a second date, preferably before the end of that date itself.


Additional fun things about my date:
I met a few people as we were strolling around, firstly, a guy I know showed up and was taking my advice on something (DHV), secondly, a hot girl I know showed up and started talking to me, as I introduced her to my girl, I could see some pre-selection switches getting turned on in both the girls lol.


The hard truth:
She is really ambitious, studying with full scholarship to be a doctor, and tells me she has never been the dating type.. more like a tom boy, but a pretty tom boy nonetheless. lol Well, her life and career path is pretty important for her, and she is just beginning to step into the big world after school. I guess I'll have to move on.. it sucks to be a grad student. I need to meet some girls of my age (22-23 yr olds).
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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I.A.F.Y.B.

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Most of us who actually read and understood the DJ Bible know your comforiting tips. Good reminder for others and props to you for finding that out yourself.

Sounds like your date knows what she wants in life. Maybe, she has a good head on her shoulders. But, don't build her up to be the girl your looking for just yet!! Her first impression may of been good. But, you will know more after connecting more.
 

Black suit

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You don't want a girl thats too ambitious. You know, those career-types. Good thing you know that. So many people make this mistake...
 

daygameguy

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Black suit said:
You don't want a girl thats too ambitious. You know, those career-types. Good thing you know that. So many people make this mistake...
Haha yeah.. I agree. When girls try talking about their ambitions a lot, I say C&F stuff like:
1. Wow.. you are throwing a lot of baggage on me here!
2. Well, I guess I could live with that, won't be easy though :)
3. You know what, you dont need to be anything, just follow me around, and I'll double your salary if you smile like that :)

What I actually meant was, I want pretty eyes but also a little down-to-earth tomboy-sih, so I can have fun with her... and not worry about taking her shopping everyday! lol

But again, to each his own.
 

daygameguy

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I.A.F.Y.B. said:
Most of us who actually read and understood the DJ Bible know your comforiting tips. Good reminder for others and props to you for finding that out yourself.

Sounds like your date knows what she wants in life. Maybe, she has a good head on her shoulders. But, don't build her up to be the girl your looking for just yet!! Her first impression may of been good. But, you will know more after connecting more.
She actually has more guy friends than girl friends. But they are all mostly good guys, who play sports and are adventurous, like herself. Some people link "more guy friends" to "AW". I didnt get that vibe from her. She is just more like a tomboy I guess.

Well anyway, she has her whole life ahead of her, and I am almost out of college. God! Time to move on... next girl plzz lol
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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