"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

I have a problem, probably not too usual either..

Deus

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People are scared of me.

Let's convey the facts:

I'm just 6'
I'm built like a fridge. not fat, NOT slim.
I have a red beard. (more on the colour later....)
I have a shaved head.
I dress/am as/a raver.

Geez, I've tried EVERY hairstyle possibly imagined. I look like a dork, in all but a shaved head. My hair is sand coloured, my templates/goatee are red, I got black/dark sideburns, and my moustach is light red/blonde...

I've tried having a "normal" hairdo, shaving off the beard, just having a moustach/sideburns/goatee etc, normal clothes, but then people think i'm "cute/cudly". There's nothing in between, I can only vary between these two extremes...

Suggestions?? :confused:

//Deus
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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semag

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if you're 6' and dressed as a raver, I'm pretty sure people aren't afraid of you unless you're pushing 250 lbs.
 

diablo

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Originally posted by semag
if you're 6' and dressed as a raver, I'm pretty sure people aren't afraid of you unless you're pushing 250 lbs.
More than likely they're chuckling behind your back at your choice of clothes. However, each to their own. If you're just looking to "normalize" your appearance, you could either get rid of the beard and go for the "Mr Clean" look, or consider a wardrobe change.
 

Deus

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Actually, I've only had "good comments" about the rave clothes. they ain't the "extreme" rave clothes you see here and there, a bit more normal than that.

I weigh in at about 100-110 KGs. I don't know how many pounds that is though...

I've tried the "mr.Clean" Look, and as I said, I look cuddly/cute. not something to strive for..

I've even tried walking around in a suit. Though, then I look like something out of "the sopranos"......

//Deus
 

Julian

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this thread is worthless without pics.
 

"I'm Not Looking for Anything Serious Right Now"

When a woman says it, guys hear a confession. A heads-up. A scheduling conflict.

Here's the translation: I don't feel anything. Right now. With you.

Watch what happens when a man triggers actual attraction. The busy career, the recent breakup, the "not in a place to date" — all of it evaporates instantly. The same woman who was guarding her freedom is suddenly free every night.

The "22 Rules" explain why. When the right switches flip, her timeline rearranges itself around you.

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Deus

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Yeah, I'm getting that feeling too, but I dislike tossing up my pic on the web though.... Hmm...

maybe I should toss one up for a short amount of time??

//Deus
 

diablo

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Originally posted by Deus
Yeah, I'm getting that feeling too, but I dislike tossing up my pic on the web though
Are you afraid someone is going to take your picture and start using it on websites saying it's them? :rolleyes:
 

Deus

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I'm just not too comfortable about people recognising me on this site :D

Hm. I have no pics newer than last new years.... or older... on the computer.. I'll try to get ahold of one tomorrow, I think my mate has some party pics, in which I feature on some...

//Deus
 

semag

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Originally posted by Deus
I'm just not too comfortable about people recognising me on this site :D
Do what lotsa people do... cut out the face in an image editing program.

EDIT: I guess with all the "scariness" talk about your head that sounds kinda dumb, nm, disregard that.
 

Deus

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Well, believe me, people would recognise me anyways, and, a third of this is about the "facial hair" so....
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Deus

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Okay, this pic will be GONE in 8 hours...

*pof* gone.

Old pic, 1.5 years roughly..
Sorry the pic doesn't show much of me, something got in the way, and it's the only pic I have with the front of my head clearly (more or less, visible.

//Deus
 
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Heizen

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People see you as cute because you have a round face. Lose the fat and you will be able to pull off hairstyles without being 'cute'
 

Julian

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losing the fat is a great start for you. Also keep the facial hair trimmed up short and lose the glasses.
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

Deus

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how do you know people are scared of you?

It's part, due to what I've heard, rumour wise.

And, some people, whom I've asked why they avoid me (old schoolmates and such) has flat out told me, I look scary. *shrugs*


Okay then... *loose the babyfat...*

I dunno about any good excercises to keep the facial fat in check, so I suppose, that in order to lose fat from the face, I'm going to have to make a general % of fat loss, correct?

"losing the glasses".
Well, that's a bit of a problem, contacts ARE expensive. and, I can't wear contacts in my line of work, (workshop mechanic).

"keep the facial hair trimmed up short"
It's kept short (roughly 10 mm) except jor my "goatee" that's about 20-30mm).

Hm...

/Deus

Ps. yes, it was a good grab =P
 
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