"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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I have a problem, probably not too usual either..

Deus

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People are scared of me.

Let's convey the facts:

I'm just 6'
I'm built like a fridge. not fat, NOT slim.
I have a red beard. (more on the colour later....)
I have a shaved head.
I dress/am as/a raver.

Geez, I've tried EVERY hairstyle possibly imagined. I look like a dork, in all but a shaved head. My hair is sand coloured, my templates/goatee are red, I got black/dark sideburns, and my moustach is light red/blonde...

I've tried having a "normal" hairdo, shaving off the beard, just having a moustach/sideburns/goatee etc, normal clothes, but then people think i'm "cute/cudly". There's nothing in between, I can only vary between these two extremes...

Suggestions?? :confused:

//Deus
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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semag

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if you're 6' and dressed as a raver, I'm pretty sure people aren't afraid of you unless you're pushing 250 lbs.
 

diablo

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Originally posted by semag
if you're 6' and dressed as a raver, I'm pretty sure people aren't afraid of you unless you're pushing 250 lbs.
More than likely they're chuckling behind your back at your choice of clothes. However, each to their own. If you're just looking to "normalize" your appearance, you could either get rid of the beard and go for the "Mr Clean" look, or consider a wardrobe change.
 

Deus

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Actually, I've only had "good comments" about the rave clothes. they ain't the "extreme" rave clothes you see here and there, a bit more normal than that.

I weigh in at about 100-110 KGs. I don't know how many pounds that is though...

I've tried the "mr.Clean" Look, and as I said, I look cuddly/cute. not something to strive for..

I've even tried walking around in a suit. Though, then I look like something out of "the sopranos"......

//Deus
 

Julian

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this thread is worthless without pics.
 

“The 22 Rules That Turned Me From Invisible to Irresistible With Women… Starting Tonight”

You can skip the expensive cars, the fancy clothes, and the endless gym selfies. Completely unnecessary.

I used to freeze the second a beautiful woman looked my way. Frustrated. Awkward. Watching other guys walk away with the girl while I stood there tongue-tied.

Then I discovered 22 simple rules that rewired my entire dating life. The anxiety vanished. Conversations flowed effortlessly. Women started chasing me for a change.

These rules trigger a woman's subconscious attraction switches. And you can start using them tonight.

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Deus

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Yeah, I'm getting that feeling too, but I dislike tossing up my pic on the web though.... Hmm...

maybe I should toss one up for a short amount of time??

//Deus
 

diablo

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Originally posted by Deus
Yeah, I'm getting that feeling too, but I dislike tossing up my pic on the web though
Are you afraid someone is going to take your picture and start using it on websites saying it's them? :rolleyes:
 

Deus

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I'm just not too comfortable about people recognising me on this site :D

Hm. I have no pics newer than last new years.... or older... on the computer.. I'll try to get ahold of one tomorrow, I think my mate has some party pics, in which I feature on some...

//Deus
 

semag

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Originally posted by Deus
I'm just not too comfortable about people recognising me on this site :D
Do what lotsa people do... cut out the face in an image editing program.

EDIT: I guess with all the "scariness" talk about your head that sounds kinda dumb, nm, disregard that.
 

Deus

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Well, believe me, people would recognise me anyways, and, a third of this is about the "facial hair" so....
 

"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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Deus

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Okay, this pic will be GONE in 8 hours...

*pof* gone.

Old pic, 1.5 years roughly..
Sorry the pic doesn't show much of me, something got in the way, and it's the only pic I have with the front of my head clearly (more or less, visible.

//Deus
 
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Heizen

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People see you as cute because you have a round face. Lose the fat and you will be able to pull off hairstyles without being 'cute'
 

Julian

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losing the fat is a great start for you. Also keep the facial hair trimmed up short and lose the glasses.
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Deus

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how do you know people are scared of you?

It's part, due to what I've heard, rumour wise.

And, some people, whom I've asked why they avoid me (old schoolmates and such) has flat out told me, I look scary. *shrugs*


Okay then... *loose the babyfat...*

I dunno about any good excercises to keep the facial fat in check, so I suppose, that in order to lose fat from the face, I'm going to have to make a general % of fat loss, correct?

"losing the glasses".
Well, that's a bit of a problem, contacts ARE expensive. and, I can't wear contacts in my line of work, (workshop mechanic).

"keep the facial hair trimmed up short"
It's kept short (roughly 10 mm) except jor my "goatee" that's about 20-30mm).

Hm...

/Deus

Ps. yes, it was a good grab =P
 
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