"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

I have a problem, probably not too usual either..

D

Deus

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People are scared of me.

Let's convey the facts:

I'm just 6'
I'm built like a fridge. not fat, NOT slim.
I have a red beard. (more on the colour later....)
I have a shaved head.
I dress/am as/a raver.

Geez, I've tried EVERY hairstyle possibly imagined. I look like a dork, in all but a shaved head. My hair is sand coloured, my templates/goatee are red, I got black/dark sideburns, and my moustach is light red/blonde...

I've tried having a "normal" hairdo, shaving off the beard, just having a moustach/sideburns/goatee etc, normal clothes, but then people think i'm "cute/cudly". There's nothing in between, I can only vary between these two extremes...

Suggestions?? :confused:

//Deus
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

Read more...

S

semag

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if you're 6' and dressed as a raver, I'm pretty sure people aren't afraid of you unless you're pushing 250 lbs.
 
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diablo

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Originally posted by semag
if you're 6' and dressed as a raver, I'm pretty sure people aren't afraid of you unless you're pushing 250 lbs.
Click to expand...
More than likely they're chuckling behind your back at your choice of clothes. However, each to their own. If you're just looking to "normalize" your appearance, you could either get rid of the beard and go for the "Mr Clean" look, or consider a wardrobe change.
 
D

Deus

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Actually, I've only had "good comments" about the rave clothes. they ain't the "extreme" rave clothes you see here and there, a bit more normal than that.

I weigh in at about 100-110 KGs. I don't know how many pounds that is though...

I've tried the "mr.Clean" Look, and as I said, I look cuddly/cute. not something to strive for..

I've even tried walking around in a suit. Though, then I look like something out of "the sopranos"......

//Deus
 
J

Julian

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this thread is worthless without pics.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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D

Deus

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Yeah, I'm getting that feeling too, but I dislike tossing up my pic on the web though.... Hmm...

maybe I should toss one up for a short amount of time??

//Deus
 
D

diablo

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Originally posted by Deus
Yeah, I'm getting that feeling too, but I dislike tossing up my pic on the web though
Click to expand...
Are you afraid someone is going to take your picture and start using it on websites saying it's them? :rolleyes:
 
D

Deus

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I'm just not too comfortable about people recognising me on this site :D

Hm. I have no pics newer than last new years.... or older... on the computer.. I'll try to get ahold of one tomorrow, I think my mate has some party pics, in which I feature on some...

//Deus
 
S

semag

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Originally posted by Deus
I'm just not too comfortable about people recognising me on this site :D
Click to expand...
Do what lotsa people do... cut out the face in an image editing program.

EDIT: I guess with all the "scariness" talk about your head that sounds kinda dumb, nm, disregard that.
 
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Deus

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Well, believe me, people would recognise me anyways, and, a third of this is about the "facial hair" so....
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

D

Deus

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Okay, this pic will be GONE in 8 hours...

*pof* gone.

Old pic, 1.5 years roughly..
Sorry the pic doesn't show much of me, something got in the way, and it's the only pic I have with the front of my head clearly (more or less, visible.

//Deus
 
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H

Heizen

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People see you as cute because you have a round face. Lose the fat and you will be able to pull off hairstyles without being 'cute'
 
J

Julian

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losing the fat is a great start for you. Also keep the facial hair trimmed up short and lose the glasses.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

Read more...

D

Deus

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how do you know people are scared of you?

It's part, due to what I've heard, rumour wise.

And, some people, whom I've asked why they avoid me (old schoolmates and such) has flat out told me, I look scary. *shrugs*


Okay then... *loose the babyfat...*

I dunno about any good excercises to keep the facial fat in check, so I suppose, that in order to lose fat from the face, I'm going to have to make a general % of fat loss, correct?

"losing the glasses".
Well, that's a bit of a problem, contacts ARE expensive. and, I can't wear contacts in my line of work, (workshop mechanic).

"keep the facial hair trimmed up short"
It's kept short (roughly 10 mm) except jor my "goatee" that's about 20-30mm).

Hm...

/Deus

Ps. yes, it was a good grab =P
 
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