"Stop Asking Your Friends What to Text Her"

Your buddy Dave has been single for three years and thinks "hey u up" is a valid strategy. Your other buddy Mike just got dumped and told you to "just be yourself."

You showed them her text. You asked them to decode the emoji. You drafted four responses and sent the screenshot to the group chat for a vote.

She's been waiting forty minutes.

Put the phone down. Stop crowdsourcing your love life. Type something that sounds like you. Hit send. Then go do literally anything else with your evening.

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I don't understand girls.

S

Skating Penguin

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My girlfriend got really mad at me because I looked at her cell phone to see what time it was. She was yelling like a buddhist monk who is having sex with a diabetic monkey and said that I was trying to spy on her and that she doesn't want me touching her stuff again.

I was like "the hell you talking about? I'm just checking the time" but she didn't listen and was really mad.

:rolleyes:

What the heck's her problem? I don't know why I'm losing my time with that nutcase.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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C

Chrisman

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Give'er the boot.
 
B

blinkwatt

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just respond with, "i aint lovin them hoes" and leave
 
N

nishbuk

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you can't take that disrespect. You need to show her she can't treat you like that. Put your goddamn footdown and show her what's up.
 
M

Mojo604

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You need to put your foot down...on her ass.:down: :crackup:
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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0

08aisaac

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Just tell her that you don't know what her problem is, but she needs to chill out.

She is probaly cheating on you. I know if I had something to hide, I woudl get pissed at anyone reading my cell phone, or getting on my computer.

So just dump her while you still can, and keep some dignity.
 
S

Sloopy

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Yeah, I can tell you from personal experience that there is a huge chance she is either cheating on your or planning on it. She's probably been writing text messages back and forth with some sweaty a55hole with a cool car and cowboy boots.

I say before you get rid of her, call her on it and let her know you won't take any of her ****.

~Sloopy
 
J

joekerr31

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dump her dude.

and when you do tell her that you cant be with a girl who is so unstable that she flies off the handle when a guy looks at her cell phone for the time.

and then dont let her explain anything. if she starts to talk just say 'its over. deal with it' and jet.

J
 
C

chuchu

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It's that time of the month. She just piss because she's horny.


Now what do you do with horny girls? You "un-horny" them. :D
 
B

brenbaus

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you either need to put your foot in her @ss, or put your d!ck in her @ss, one of the two
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

Nightwing

Nightwing

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Originally posted by Skating Penguin
My girlfriend got really mad at me because I looked at her cell phone to see what time it was. She was yelling like a buddhist monk who is having sex with a diabetic monkey and said that I was trying to spy on her and that she doesn't want me touching her stuff again.

I was like "the hell you talking about? I'm just checking the time" but she didn't listen and was really mad.

:rolleyes:

What the heck's her problem? I don't know why I'm losing my time with that nutcase.
Click to expand...
You sure she's not seeing someone else or have other guys she's flirting with?? You gotta ask yourself why she's giving you such strong reactions and accusations even after you explained her actions.

In the meantime, leave alone. DO NOT call her--let her call you. And when she calls you, she needs to have an apology in hand. Even then, you put her on the backburner status.
 
Nightwing

Nightwing

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Originally posted by Skating Penguin
My girlfriend got really mad at me because I looked at her cell phone to see what time it was. She was yelling like a buddhist monk who is having sex with a diabetic monkey and said that I was trying to spy on her and that she doesn't want me touching her stuff again.

I was like "the hell you talking about? I'm just checking the time" but she didn't listen and was really mad.

:rolleyes:

What the heck's her problem? I don't know why I'm losing my time with that nutcase.
Click to expand...
You sure she's not seeing someone else or have other guys she's flirting with?? You gotta ask yourself why she's giving you such strong reactions and accusations even after you explained your actions.

In the meantime, leave her alone. DO NOT call her--let her call you. And when she calls you, she needs to have an apology in hand. Even then, you put her on the backburner status.
 
F

Flyer

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"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"

I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.

The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.

Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.

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B

blinkwatt

Master Don Juan
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you dont have to understand girls,you just have to know how to make them want you.
 
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22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
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