CapedCrusader08
Banned
- Joined
- Sep 27, 2008
- Messages
- 524
- Reaction score
- 3
So then basically, you're against any sort of long term marriage or commitment?
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
I don't mean to flood the boards....
- Thread starter CapedCrusader08
- Start date
"I just moved here from Florida."
That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?
She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."
She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.
I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.
Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.
You need to stop being a pvssy. There I said it. Your a pvssy and your scared of living life. Your afraid to try, your afraid to stay where you are. You want to change but you are scared to. You have permission to change. I give you permission, the universe gives you permission. Now you just have to give yourself permission. It will not kill you to change. It will not ruin your life to change.
Stop comparing your life to everyone else. Nobody else has your same viewpoint on the universe. Nobody! That's whats special about you. Nobody will ever have the exact same experiences and thoughts that you have. They may have areas that overlap but they will never be you. You can't compare yourself to other people because you are not them, and they are not you. The only race is with yourself.
You have to make a pledge to do the following.
1. No more post about your past.
2. No more post about what you are lacking.
3. No more post about what other people have and you don't.
Until you can pledge to do that, you don't deserve anymore help. This is step one.
All of your post from now on must only be about what you are actually doing. Post about your meditations, post about going to the gym, post about the new shirt you bought, post about the girl who smiled and you and you smiled back. If you have nothing good to post about, then don't post.
You have to train your mind. This is what you lack. Mental discipline. And nobody can do it for you but you. You have to learn to control your mind. It's hard work because you've never done it before.
How do I know this? Because I used to be you. Depressed, suicidal, feeling left behind. Feeling outcast. Feeling weird on the inside. I've moved past that. You can to. If you want to and your willing to do the work. Nothing worth having is easy, not even control over your own mind.
Good luck.
btw. this is the last time I will reply to your post unless you do pledge to change your posting habits. You can only keep feeding these negative post for so long. Part of training your mind is knowing when to let people come to the truth on their own and stop trying to help them. So this is the last time I will offer you any help unless you start making moves in the right direction. I suggest that others do the same as well.
Stop comparing your life to everyone else. Nobody else has your same viewpoint on the universe. Nobody! That's whats special about you. Nobody will ever have the exact same experiences and thoughts that you have. They may have areas that overlap but they will never be you. You can't compare yourself to other people because you are not them, and they are not you. The only race is with yourself.
You have to make a pledge to do the following.
1. No more post about your past.
2. No more post about what you are lacking.
3. No more post about what other people have and you don't.
Until you can pledge to do that, you don't deserve anymore help. This is step one.
All of your post from now on must only be about what you are actually doing. Post about your meditations, post about going to the gym, post about the new shirt you bought, post about the girl who smiled and you and you smiled back. If you have nothing good to post about, then don't post.
You have to train your mind. This is what you lack. Mental discipline. And nobody can do it for you but you. You have to learn to control your mind. It's hard work because you've never done it before.
How do I know this? Because I used to be you. Depressed, suicidal, feeling left behind. Feeling outcast. Feeling weird on the inside. I've moved past that. You can to. If you want to and your willing to do the work. Nothing worth having is easy, not even control over your own mind.
Good luck.
btw. this is the last time I will reply to your post unless you do pledge to change your posting habits. You can only keep feeding these negative post for so long. Part of training your mind is knowing when to let people come to the truth on their own and stop trying to help them. So this is the last time I will offer you any help unless you start making moves in the right direction. I suggest that others do the same as well.
CapedCrusader08
Banned
- Joined
- Sep 27, 2008
- Messages
- 524
- Reaction score
- 3
you're right. I have trained myself so much to this, that this all I know how to feel. I get these anxiety attacks as a result of it. I can't help it though. Everyday I am surrounded by people and feel utterly isolated. I see people with that someone they care about who have been with them for x amount of time. I can't help but feel totally empty and alone. I see it everywhere I go. My mood tends to shift. I am really concerned that somewhere during youth or puberty, I like developed wrong or something.
I know I need to let go, but something is holding me back. I don't know, but it's a lack of something. Some sort of purpose or activity even. I mean, I feel I lack, I know I am going on here, in field experience with women. The signs, the body language, the ioi's, I just wouldn't know them. Maybe it is some vibe I give off. like I come off a little desperate. That's what I want to avoid.
It is hard trying to control the mind. I realize that. I really feel like I need to talk with someone, lay everything out to them, and have them go, here's the solution. I will try to do as you said.
I know I need to let go, but something is holding me back. I don't know, but it's a lack of something. Some sort of purpose or activity even. I mean, I feel I lack, I know I am going on here, in field experience with women. The signs, the body language, the ioi's, I just wouldn't know them. Maybe it is some vibe I give off. like I come off a little desperate. That's what I want to avoid.
It is hard trying to control the mind. I realize that. I really feel like I need to talk with someone, lay everything out to them, and have them go, here's the solution. I will try to do as you said.
Action fixes it. Talk does nothing. You can talk to a shrink for years and years....but if you take no action you are just mentally masturbating over your problem. Let's see if you can force yourself to change your tone. Think before you write. In fact, sleep on a post before you make it. Don't just spew out a diatribe on "woe is me" think first. Don't even reply to this. Just do what I told you.CapedCrusader08 said:you're right. I have trained myself so much to this, that this all I know how to feel. I get these anxiety attacks as a result of it. I can't help it though. Everyday I am surrounded by people and feel utterly isolated. I see people with that someone they care about who have been with them for x amount of time. I can't help but feel totally empty and alone. I see it everywhere I go. My mood tends to shift. I am really concerned that somewhere during youth or puberty, I like developed wrong or something.
I know I need to let go, but something is holding me back. I don't know, but it's a lack of something. Some sort of purpose or activity even. I mean, I feel I lack, I know I am going on here, in field experience with women. The signs, the body language, the ioi's, I just wouldn't know them. Maybe it is some vibe I give off. like I come off a little desperate. That's what I want to avoid.
It is hard trying to control the mind. I realize that. I really feel like I need to talk with someone, lay everything out to them, and have them go, here's the solution. I will try to do as you said.
loving
Senior Don Juan
listen to eckhart tolle
fucxk sosuave. he will talk to yyou
l-i-s-t-e-n t-o e-c-k-h-a-r-t o-r c-o-n-t-i-n-u-e t-o s-u-f-f-e-r
fucxk sosuave. he will talk to yyou
l-i-s-t-e-n t-o e-c-k-h-a-r-t o-r c-o-n-t-i-n-u-e t-o s-u-f-f-e-r
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.