I am broken - Marriage Decision Must be Made

Joined
Feb 19, 2019
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#81
As of right now I am planning to propose to her soon. I think the security she provides outweighs the superficial issues I have with her. But I can't help but want to try and bed other women... or even romance them... I don't know I have some kind of issue... like I feel validated when I go for a girl I like and she likes me back. There is just so much crap women out there that my girl really has a lot of good qualities.

What is my alternative? Hope to find a thinner girl who is as great? I've dated so many girls to appreciate when I have one that is quality. The cognitive dissonance is so strong though, how am I going to stop chasing other women?



I want both that's the problem....and I can't have it.... I am confused.. What is everyone saying to do dump her? Then what... deal with constant frustration from the abundance of "quality" women we have out there today lol.. I mean sometimes I think I should just focus on my business but I feel like she is the one good decision I've made in my life... I am so fvcked up please tell me more insight man.. at least you mentioned cognitive dissonance which is exactly what is messing me up right now



Again with this ethnic crap... I'm fvcking white you moron not that it should matter.

What is your SMV man? 1.5? This whole SMV crap is an excuse for you all to feel better about the fact that you are alone... it justifies it for you. How about actually connecting with someone and being vulnerable? Ohhhhh no fvck that! Go read another manosphere book you fvcking robot. Or maybe 69 with your butt buddy mr. goodstuff who likes all your posts lol
I don't think you should dump her. You're happy with her. You say she has positive qualities.

If you flirt with other women while you are in a relationship with no intent or plans to actually follow through that's par for the course.

It sounds like you've been honest. I don't know why or if others are beating you up for it. Just ignore it and do what's right for you.
 

LARaiders85

Master Don Juan
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#82
lol I'll be leaving this forum for a bit. Time interact with people who aren't delusional and actually live in the real present day world.
Try saying the same things that you said in your original post to someone in the real world and see how fast youre ostracized for life LMAO, scum of the Earth
 
Joined
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#83
Try saying the same things that you said in your original post to someone in the real world and see how fast youre ostracized for life LMAO, scum of the Earth
I think a normal, non-sociopath would be pretty sympathetic to what he's saying. It's not stuff you'd reveal to someone you just met. But to a confidante, someone with some integrity you could trust, yes, you could.

I skimmed through it: fat girl, he likes her, wants to cheat on her, crazy debt, unhappy, 40. OK, I change my mind, he does sound a bit scummy lol.
 

Reyaj

Master Don Juan
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#84
Try saying the same things that you said in your original post to someone in the real world and see how fast youre ostracized for life LMAO, scum of the Earth
LMAO you're so cool man! 5,329 likes on here I bow to your greatness.

Lol fvcking tool
 

Reyaj

Master Don Juan
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#85
I think a normal, non-sociopath would be pretty sympathetic to what he's saying. It's not stuff you'd reveal to someone you just met. But to a confidante, someone with some integrity you could trust, yes, you could.

I skimmed through it: fat girl, he likes her, wants to cheat on her, crazy debt, unhappy, 40. OK, I change my mind, he does sound a bit scummy lol.
This is mostly incorrect but I wouldn't expect most people on here to read something on here objectively. I mention she gained weight and that becomes the fixation.. I can almost guarantee she is more attractive then most of the girls anyone has here... actually I take that back most people on here are single and need to tell themselves they are by choice. Having a preponderance of "likes" justifies their existence. As far as the debt, I probably make more money than most of you too, so that is something I can conquer.

The only accurate part is the cheating... I am attracted to women, shoot me. What most of you morons don't value is that what I write on here is actually legit. You probably can learn more from it than those who just write on here for effect and "likes" to substantiate their purpose. If you ever notice I don't post on here regularly, I have a life which supersedes a forum where a bunch of people struggling with women come to.
 
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Reyaj

Master Don Juan
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#87
Have fun humiliating yourself with your fat wife
Wow, the comeback of the year! lol I'd rather have fun humiliating myself banging your wvhore mother, I can't think of doing too many things lower than that :)
 
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#88
So, marry the fat fvck. If she was actually hot, you wouldn't be whining like a suicidal b1tch on this forum.

The reality is, you're a loser. Mountains of debt, about to marry a fattie, middle aged, throwing wild tantrums on this forum whenever anyone replies to you even though you're begging for advice (more like whimpering for sympathy like a beat dog). Walk away from this forum or keep trolling it, you'll still be the same loser either way.
 

Reyaj

Master Don Juan
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#90
So, marry the fat fvck. If she was actually hot, you wouldn't be whining like a suicidal b1tch on this forum.

The reality is, you're a loser. Mountains of debt, about to marry a fattie, middle aged, throwing wild tantrums on this forum whenever anyone replies to you even though you're begging for advice (more like whimpering for sympathy like a beat dog). Walk away from this forum or keep trolling it, you'll still be the same loser either way.
You don't have to use your 2nd account to respond to help support your reply dude, this forum is filled with other delusional losers who will do that for you. At least be smart enough to use an account that doesn't also have an "LA" reference in it. I can tell you graduated at the top of your class ;)

But Yes I sure am a loser... I'm about to marry a pretty girl 10 years younger than me that has a successful career and good family values. Some delusional loser with multiple accounts having "LA" in it on a internet forum thinks she's a "fat fvck" because I said she gained weight in our relationship. I freely admit I have debt, and I equally admit I have a good job that will allow me to rectify it. I am sorry I can't be as successful as you are on here with all those 'likes' man. You must get more ass than a toilet seat, I'm very jealous!

Lol now stfu and stop interrupting me and your mom
 
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Joined
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#91
You don't have to use your 2nd account to respond to help support your reply dude, this forum is filled with other delusional losers who will do that for you. At least be smart enough to use an account that doesn't also have an "LA" reference in it. I can tell you graduated at the top of your class ;)

But Yes I sure am a loser... I'm about to marry a pretty girl 10 years younger than me that has a successful career and good family values. Some delusional loser with multiple accounts having "LA" in it on a internet forum thinks she's a "fat fvck" because I said she gained weight in our relationship. I freely admit I have debt, and I equally admit I have a good job that will allow me to rectify it. I am sorry I can't be as successful as you are on here with all those 'likes' man. You must get more ass than a toilet seat, I'm very jealous!

Lol now stfu and stop interrupting me and your mom
Enjoy your debt, fat tub of goo you call a girlfriend and worthless life.
 

BeExcellent

Master Don Juan
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#92
@Reyaj, life is about choices. With any choice you give up other choices, those are opportunity costs.

You are until recently on the fence, weighing choices and opportunity costs.

About the weight issue. Consider this. Does she eat the same things & same portions as you? Chances are she can’t or she will indeed gain weight. My BF likes me to eat with him whenever he gets hungry and enjoy the meal same as he does. Like your girl I’m a good cook. He outweighs me by 100lbs (he’s 218, I’m 118), and I can’t intake the same amount of food or weight starts to gain. He understands this but doesn’t always like it. But he loves that I make staying fit/hot a priority. And I’m 50, and had 3 children.

Here are some suggestions about the weight so you guys can tackle that together. It seems to me if she takes care of the weight issue your desire for her would rebound and your desire for “thinner” would mitigate to a degree.

1. Have a chat about the weight. You owe it to both of you & need to be honest WITH HER that it’s an issue.
2. Understand it may be *what* she is eating alongside how much. I eat a keto/paleo diet and have for years. I rarely eat bread, grain, pasta, or soda. I don’t eat dairy except heavy cream & cheese (fat is OK). Carbs are the enemy and if you eat carbs they need to come with fiber (e.g. fruit rather than cereal).
3. If she has your children encourage her to watch her weight closely during pregnancy and strongly encourage her to breastfeed. Breastfeeding creates a caloric deficit and will help reduce her body weight after delivery. I went from 120lbs to 155lbs with each pregnancy and was back down to pre pregnancy weight within months because I breastfed and I was disciplined in my own food consumption.
4. Both of you should weigh daily. Nude, first thing in the morning after you pee and before you eat or drink anything. Weight can’t just jump on you unawares if you guys make this a habit.

Discipline is a theme here. If she wants to look good for you & be fit, it is a lifelong discipline.

Same goes for you. You must exercise discipline where sex/lust is concerned. Quit cheating. Commitment is a choice. If you make that choice have the integrity to yourself and to her to honor it.

My boyfriend was chatting with a wise old widow not long ago. The elderly woman said something that resonates deeply with him. She said:

“Whenever the grass on the other side of the fence looks greener it’s time to cut your own lawn.”

Think on those things and best wishes.

Cheers -BE
 
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